Ageing Cat. Support.

[TabbyTatCat]

Hello.

I didn't realise there was a cat section. My lovely boy is nearly 18 & seems to be ageing rapidly the past few months. He's losing his hearing & has also stopped grooming himself.

Is that normal? He currently has a matted section on his back so I need to get that sorted (it's only small, I noticed it today)

He's very noisy, he's always meowing, this hasn't changed, although he used to hear us coming behind him, hear us opening the bedroom window if we were upstairs & he was at the back of the garden, not facing us, & he'd turn & start meowing... Now he won't notice at all or if we are calling him then he will occasionally start looking around, but he can't locate the sound.

He still follows us down the road to the shops but he just kind of sits there gazing into the distance as he can't hear us coming back now, whereas before, he'd hear us from halfway down the road & come charging, meowing.

He has 3 legs but has always been independent & loves being outside. He gets lots of attention from the neighbours/strangers, because of his meowing & then the 3 legs. He runs in like a zig-zag pattern. I joke that he lays on his side across the path, to show everybody that he only has 3 legs, so that they will give him attention!

I'm not sure what I want with this thread really, just to know that there are others out there maybe, to chat about fellow cat-related issues with! I feel really sad that he seems to be getting old so fast, & can't imagine him ever not being here. I got him when he was 2.

@TabbyTatCat I am glad you are having some lovely precious time with your boy. I will be thinking of you tomorrow. I am feeling a little better now but isn’t easy. Today my son and I had our favourite pictures of our girl printed and have put them on one of those frames that hold several pictures to have up in the living room. We also bought a new smaller bed for her sister to keep downstairs to see if she will stay down with us so she isn’t lonely and so far she seems ok. Take care x

There's no 'have to' here. It sounds to me like he's rallied a bit this weekend, and that's not to say you won't end up making the call in a few days time, or a few weeks time, but the vets assessment on Friday was based on how he presented then.

If you're unsure because he seemed brighter, then no better is going to criticise you for pushing the appointment back by 24 hours to see what direction he's going in.

Just because Christmas is imminent, don't feel pushed into making a decision. If you're not comfortable, it's the right one for your kitty. And it might be that despite him rallying, you feel it's the right decision at the right time, and that's fine, but don't feel like the decision has been made already or that you have no choice.

marypoppinsreturns I'm glad that things are a little easier, sounds like you are all being there for each other & I'm glad to read this. The pictures sound lovely.

I ordered some keepsakes for the kids on Friday, & a sun catcher with all 3 of our cats on. They will take a while to arrive.

I know, Babyboomtastic This is torturing me really, I just don't know what to do.

Part of me thinks 'Well his legs are much better so maybe he will be fine, maybe they are wrong', but then I think 'But he hasn't been to the toilet, & he has a funny smell about him, & he's very sleep which isn't normal for him'.

The vet said that it's highly unlikely that if I keep him at home with me then he will just lay down & pass away, she said it's likely to be extremely distressing & traumatising for us all, so this is where I come back to 'I have to have him put to sleep'.

I don't really understand the thing with the kidneys but when I'm under stress I kind of shut down & the vet tried to explain things a few times but I still didn't really 'get it'.

I think that, in simple terms, the fact that he isn't producing waste means that it's all staying inside his body & causing him damage, even though it's not 'Clear to see' this from the outside.

I don't feel like it's 'time' but maybe I'm just a terrible person & can't see how much he's suffering. Because I don't want to let him go

I feel like somebody else has to make this decision for me as I just can't.

Does the vet have any idea why he isn’t weeing @TabbyTatCat? It does sound so worrying and yes, very serious. And they are right that cats don’t pass away peacefully in their sleep sadly. But if you’re not ready you’re not ready - you matter too 😟 Could the vet do a home visit? I am so glad we were able to do that for our girl. Thinking of you so much, it’s just so difficult and heartbreaking.

HarryPotterandtheClimateofFear My first cat had seemed a little off one day & then the next morning I found her just gone, so I wondered if this could happen in this case (when I took her to the vet after, she found a tumour but there had been no signs)

He has only had one small poo & no wees since Wednesday.
The vet said that it's extremely unlikely to be anything other than kidneys shutting down, said that they can put him on a drip to rehydrate him & do blood tests but she's as certain as she can be that they would just tell us that the kidneys are shutting down.

She did say that he wasn't in any obvious distress, isn't crying out in pain or anything ('Just his usual grumbling at the vets) & that's why she let me take him home.

I don't think they offer to do it at home. She told me to book the appointment for Monday there & then but I couldn't bring myself to say the words to reception so I just left.

Have a look at https://www.felinecrf.org

My cat also has ckd (currently stage 2). The woman behind this blog has brought many cats back from the brink when they are in crisis with CKD, though obviously that's not always possible or the right thing.

Thank you Babyboomtastic I'll have a look. All of the vets have said to me that we never got his Thyroid under control & this is why he still has such a good appetite (generally)

From having a brief look into it, surely they should be catheter using to see if there is wee to come out, or it's just not being produced, and the impact of IV fluids. Those will help give the answer of whether it's actually his kidneys shutting down.

I don't know, Babyboomtastic. He's just had problems with his mouth so that's another sign of kidney disease progressing & I suppose he could have stopped going to the toilet before, I only 'noticed' that he wasn't going, because I started to keep him in when he hurt his legs.

There's also the strange smell coming from him.

The other thing that I keep thinking about (mind is working overtime tonight & I've not slept for the past 2 nights as I'm on the sofa to be near my cat) is that the vet went & spoke to a second vet for a while, & came back saying the exact same thing, so it's 2 vets opinions & not just the 1.

I'll ring the vet as soon as they open tomorrow & see what they say.

Thank you everybody for the support.

I kind of wish that he was a more cuddly cat as I could use the comfort tonight

I’m so glad I came across this tonight. My dear little tortie is 19 and has had an abdominal mass grow for the past 2 years. The last 48 hours I’ve noticed a drastic change, and interestingly a strong smell of wee. Vet said the mass has grown a lot and she has lost weight, and due to her
not eating we could be looking at days not weeks left. It’s awful feeling rushed into a decision just because it’s Christmas. And OP I know how you feel when you say you don’t want to be the one to make the decision. Sending unmumsnetty hugs

Thank you Silverstarfishes I'm so sorry about your cat too.

I'm not sure what my cat smells of. There is a tinge of urine but something else not pleasant too. My son said that he smells of perfume but I think that's because I'd just been snuggling into him.

Is it a sweet smell on his breath?

When our girl was first diagnosed with kidney issues I noticed a smell of wee on her. It seemed to pass and she was with us for two years after that. But she was weeing way more than usual so clearly a different presentation.

@Silverstarfishes im sorry you’re going through this too. Christmas must add a whole additional layer of stress xx

HarryPotterandtheClimateofFear Babyboomtastic It's just not a very pleasant smell, almost smells like poo, I'd say.

He has had kidney disease for a while & they were trying to sort the Thyroid first, so it's probably just progressed.

He's had his meds & more cuddles from me. I cried big tears all over his head then rubbed him dry with a blanket, so he wasn't very impressed.

I said to him 'You just want to go don't you. Not go like not being here anymore, go like get down & snuggle back in your spot. I don't want you to go either, but you can go to your snuggle spot. I'm here if you need me'.

He's had some renal food (I'm just putting everything out & letting him have what he'd like) & some sausage, he's now back in his new favourite spot.

How do you get through the last night

@TabbyTatCat I hope you both got some rest. Remember this is the last kind, loving thing you can do for him. He knows he is safe and loved and the vet will make it all as gentle as can be for everyone. We are holding you in our hearts ❤️‍🩹

Thank you HarryPotterandtheClimateofFear You have been very kind, when you are going through such heartbreak yourself

Sending you much love @TabbyTatCat. I always remember an adage I was taught around the horses - better a week too early than a day too late.

Thank you CaveMum.

Slight snag as they only have 2 vets in instead of 3 so I'm waiting for them to call me.

I've just found these lovely cat teddies for the kids on eBay so have ordered those. A lot of the cat teddies looked sad & both of the kids will pick up on it that they look sad so these are perfect as they are smiling.

Unexpected update
He's been to the vets & I still have him with me. My kids are so happy, so am I but I mean they gave me the biggest smiles

It was a vet I hadn't seen before, she couldn't check his bladder properly as he was growling & hissing so she took him out the back with a second person (& they were gone for 10 minutes which felt like an eternity) she came back & said she cannot believe how well he's doing on his legs, she got him out & he charged across the room & they struggled to catch him.

He doesn't seem like a cat who is 'At the end' & he doesn't seem like he is at the end stage of kidney disease either.

She thinks that he's probably done some small wees & I've not noticed. His bladder isn't very full & it's not causing him pain.

He's already on all of the painkillers that he can have & he's lost weight again so 'You won't have him with you for long'

But that's basically it, she's not wanting to do blood tests or anything further as she thinks that everything is taking its toll but he doesn't seem unhappy, doesn't seem in pain, doesn't seem distressed, he's legs are clearly better so I could have him PTS if I wanted to or I could take him home & she's more than happy for me to do that.

So I have him back with me.
What an emotional rollercoaster.

Thank you everybody, for being there with me

Oh my goodness I am so happy for you @TabbyTatCat ! The joy and relief we felt when we decided not to go ahead the first time with our cat was off the scale so I know how you must be feeling. We had another month with her and every day was a blessing. I hope there is turkey in his future 😻

Oh that’s wonderful news @TabbyTatCat I'm so pleased for you all.

Our girl seems to be rallying too, she’s more active rather than sleeping all the time and while she’s still a bit unstable going round corners and jumping from one surface to another (she’s totally fine jumping up into her chair) she’s been pretty good the last day or so. Fingers crossed for more happy days to come, even if they are fewer.

Thank you CaveMum I'm glad to read your update too, really pleased for you.

Thank you HarryPotterandtheClimateofFear. It's been such a strange & emotional few days. I can't quite believe that he's still here with me.

@TabbyTatCat This is good news. Im
so happy to hear this.

@TabbyTatCat What lovely news. Hope you have a wonderful time with him over Christmas :)