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Original poster

My darling cat died

69 replies

DearRussell · 22/09/2024 12:23

My beautiful boy died on Friday. He was almost 15 and I took him to the vet because of drastic weight loss. He was the heart of our family. The vet examined him and said it’s very bad news. He has cancer and needs to be put to sleep.
im still reeling. She let me take him home for a few hours so my children said goodbye. I even took my little boy out of school for a bit to say goodbye.
when the awful time came I held him in my arms and took his last breaths with him.
i am broken. Overwhelmed with sadness

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Original poster
DearRussell · 27/09/2024 16:56

Deadhouseplant · 27/09/2024 13:38

We said goodbye to our dearly loved boy this week and it’s just devastated the family. I honestly didn’t think it would hit us all as hard as it has. Probably wishful thinking.
Condolences to all of you who are going through this as well. It’s so hard, I’m not sure I can do this again.

I am so sorry. And I feel the same, I don't think I can go through this again

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Pudmyboy · 28/09/2024 21:54

So sorry to read about your loss, it is indeed heartbreaking, perhaps an over-used phrase but it is absolutely true. Please be kind to yourself. What helped me was not thinking 'I loved my cat' but 'I still love my cat, even though he isn't here', I don't know why it helped but it did. I hope you find what helps you and your family 💐

Original poster
DearRussell · 29/09/2024 03:23

Thank you. I love him so much. I’m not sleeping and not managing much at all. His cremation is on Monday and I’m traveling to be with him

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Pudmyboy · 29/09/2024 10:07

Maybe later, when you are ready, Blue Cross offer a bereavement counselling service xx

Original poster
DearRussell · 29/09/2024 13:33

Pudmyboy · 29/09/2024 10:07

Maybe later, when you are ready, Blue Cross offer a bereavement counselling service xx

Thank you. I’ve been given the card for this service but I don’t feel able to call I didn’t go to sleep last night at all. I’m not managing well. Tomorrow I’m traveling to the pet cemetery for his cremation and I’m taking the whole day to myself and Russell.

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caringcarer · 29/09/2024 14:30

You never get over losing a beloved kitty. I have a large photo frame with a photo of all of the cats I've ever had. One with the different shaped cut outs in. It's by the front door on the wall and it's the first thing I see when I come home. ☕🍰

CatChant · 29/09/2024 15:35

DearRussell · 27/09/2024 16:56

I am so sorry. And I feel the same, I don't think I can go through this again

Show quote history

It’s early days and your grief for your dear boy is still very raw and painful. Give yourself time and be kind to yourself.

Time is the best healer and your memories will come to be a comfort. As will the knowledge that you gave him a wonderful life.

When our last lovely girl was PTS after suffering a catastrophic stroke I wept buckets and I remember saying I was glad we (humans) didn’t live any longer because it was too hard to say goodbye to our much-loved cats over and over again.

But I would not have been without any of them. They all brought so much happiness in their lifetimes that they were all worth every single tear.

As the late queen said: “Grief is the price we pay for love.”

Two years on we have two endearing, funny, charming little minxes as well as two now sedate old gentleman cats who are slightly bemused by their antics.

I still miss all their predecessors, and I know we are storing up more heartbreak for the future but they are so very worth it.

Take care.

Birchwoods · 29/09/2024 20:19

I'm so terribly sorry for the loss of your dear Russell.
We lost our beloved Amber on Friday. She'd been diabetic for three years but went downhill quite rapidly last week and it was time to say goodbye on Friday. The vet came out to us and we were with her. I am bereft, and overcome with grief. She was my soulmate, we had such a deep bond and I feel completely lost without her. She was 16.
She will be cremated on Monday or Tuesday and we're going to have her ashes. We wrapped her in her favourite blanket, with a teddy from each of my daughters and a book (Peppa Pig the best pet) that my 2yo used to 'read' to her. I'm regretting sending that blanket with her though as I feel like it would've helped up feel close to her to still have it and use it.

CinnyQ · 30/09/2024 07:27

I am so sorry @DearRussell and everyone who is grieving their beloved cats.

Our beloved 13 year old cat became suddenly very ill last Wednesday. We had her put to sleep on Saturday as there was nothing more that could be done without it being invasive and distressing for her. Vet thinks may have been cancer, but we haven't had the test results back.

It has absolutely floored me and DH, and we have been through losing parents and siblings. It is just terrible.

DH and I buried her in the back garden. I find it comforting that she is there and keep going out to talk to her.

Pudmyboy · 30/09/2024 11:24

Sending a handhold for today @DearRussell 💐💐💐

Original poster
DearRussell · 01/10/2024 07:27

Thank you so much everyone and I’m so desperately sorry for the other cat parents going through this loss.

yesterday was gruelling and traumatic. I traveled to Northampton from London to be with Russell for his cremation. I spent time with him in the chapel and kissed him and talked to him. I was distraught.

I got home late last night and I’ll probably stay in bed today. Fortunately I have help because my oldest can take little one to school for me. I need more time on my own and just lying down

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TheShellBeach · 01/10/2024 09:21

This is one of the saddest threads.

OP I'm glad you were able to go to Russell's cremation yesterday. It's clear that you loved him devotedly.

Do take care of yourself. You'll gradually start to feel better, but it takes lots of time.

TheShellBeach · 01/10/2024 09:22

@CinnyQ I am so sorry that your dear cat has also just died.

Also @Birchwoods you have just lost yours as well. I am very sorry.

I've never known such pain - when a beloved cat dies, it's unbearable.

CinnyQ · 01/10/2024 10:27

TheShellBeach · 01/10/2024 09:22

@CinnyQ I am so sorry that your dear cat has also just died.

Also @Birchwoods you have just lost yours as well. I am very sorry.

I've never known such pain - when a beloved cat dies, it's unbearable.

Edited

Thanks. The pain is just horrible, isn't it?

Pudmyboy · 01/10/2024 18:24

I hope you had a good rest today @DearRussell

LifeOfBriony · 01/10/2024 18:35

So sorry to hear this. I had similar a few years go and I still miss him.

Hugs to all going through this awful loss.

💔

Original poster
DearRussell · 01/10/2024 19:36

Thank you so much everyone. I feel so low. I feel unwell because of the grief. I’ve asked my daughter to cook for the younger children this evening and I’m back in bed. She will also take her little brother to school in the morning if I can’t manage it. I’m not able at the moment but I know I’ll pull through. I’ll never be the same though. The loss is too great. I’m sorry if I’m making other people sad and reminding them of their losses. I’m so bereft I feel sick. But I know others have been through this and understand the pain

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CatChant · 01/10/2024 22:43

I wish I could say something to help. I think he was your once in a lifetime cat. I had to say goodbye to mine nineteen years ago and it felt as though the sky had fallen in.

Only time heals but it will heal. You’ll never not miss him but the pain will lessen.

When I look back I think what a privilege it was to have had my dear girl in my life.

Be kind to yourself.

Original poster
DearRussell · 01/10/2024 22:50

Thank you. He was everything to me. So was his twin brother who died 5 years ago. I have never got over losing him and I was in fear of losing Russell for the past 5 years because of the anguish and the hole that his brother left behind. We love them both so much. They did so much for us all. They were the heart of the family and my heart will never be mended. I feel crushed and lost.

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Original poster
DearRussell · 01/10/2024 22:51

But yes what an enormous privilege it’s been. I’m honoured but also devastated

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CookiePookie · 01/10/2024 22:55

So sorry for your loss, OP. Do you know you can have pet ashes made into gems/jewellery? It might help your heart to have a little bit of Russell close to you always. I imagine it's expensive but something to consider.

Original poster
DearRussell · 01/10/2024 22:59

CookiePookie · 01/10/2024 22:55

So sorry for your loss, OP. Do you know you can have pet ashes made into gems/jewellery? It might help your heart to have a little bit of Russell close to you always. I imagine it's expensive but something to consider.

Thank you yes I was thinking about that. I have his ashes here. I spent time with him in the chapel at the crematorium then he was cremated and then I came home with his ashes and a little bag they put his fur and whiskers in. I haven’t been able to look. It’s all too shocking. I took the heart that his brothers ashes are in. And they have put Russell’s ashes in there. I haven’t opened it yet.

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Menopausalsourpuss · 01/10/2024 23:03

Our boy was pts after getting ill suddenly about a month ago. So upsetting . We buried him in the garden, not cremated, and planted a rosebush so am constantly seeing it when out there. So upsetting, have lost other pets before but this has hit harder I think because not so busy as I was previously and at home more. Commiserations op. X

Original poster
DearRussell · 01/10/2024 23:03

I am thinking maybe little tattoos of paw prints

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Original poster
DearRussell · 01/10/2024 23:04

Menopausalsourpuss · 01/10/2024 23:03

Our boy was pts after getting ill suddenly about a month ago. So upsetting . We buried him in the garden, not cremated, and planted a rosebush so am constantly seeing it when out there. So upsetting, have lost other pets before but this has hit harder I think because not so busy as I was previously and at home more. Commiserations op. X

Thank you. I’m in a rental so can’t bury him so ashes was the best i could do. So sorry about your loss too. That would be heartbreaking to see the rose bush even though it’s a lovely thing to do

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