Our new addition!

[Melon2312]

We picked up our new rescue cat Ella yesterday! She’s 2 years old but tiny as she had kittens when she was very young which caused her growth to be stunted 😢.

She’s a super friendly girl and has settled in with ease, but she’s confined to the spare room at the moment as we have to slowly introduce her to our other cat Jasmine, who is 12. So far Jasmine has hissed and growled a little through the door when she realised someone was in there, but I gave her plenty of affection and treats and she’s not done it again since. Will probably let them see each other through a mesh stair gate tomorrow, fingers crossed all goes well but I’ll keep you posted as I know some of you were interested in the knowing how it went.

Pics of Ella (ginger) and Jasmine (brown)

That’s what I’m worried about. I have been letting her have free roam at least once if not twice a day, for an hour or so, but usually put her back when jasmine starts scratching at the door of whichever room she’s been shut in, as I figure pissing her off isn’t going to help anything!

Do you think it’s more likely to be psychological than something to do with the vaccine then? I don’t want her to be depressed, this is why I was worried about taking things so slowly.

Also to clarify, I’m not saying out at work every day, I have to go in to the office two days a week, so on those days she is on her own for longer than usual, although my son goes in to see her when he gets home from school and plays with her.

when I’m at home I obviously go in and see her regularly throughout the day.

If her vaccine was Monday and she's been fine ever since I wouldn't think it's a reaction to that. I'm not a vet though so you could always ring in the morning if you're worried.

Does she only have company for an hour twice a day?

X-post!

Some cats really don't like being shut away - our middle boy gets really stressed if he's accidentally shut somewhere - to the point that it gives him cystitis and he pees blood. Obviously that's quite extreme but it's not unusual for cats to hate being shut away on their own.

No, see my additional post - it’s normally more but difficult on days I’m in the office.

I do still worry if she’s getting enough company though, it’s so hard with her being in one room.

should I leave jasmine to scratch when she’s the one shut away so Ella can have longer out, or will that be counter productive?

This is so hard. I don’t want it to get to the point of having to medicate either cat because they’re depressed, that doesn’t seem right and I feel like she’d be better off going back to the rescue than going down that road

I really couldn't say - I guess it depends if Jasmine is "just" attention seeking or whether she's genuinely distressed?

Ultimately some cats will just never get along, and two females is apparently the most difficult combination unfortunately. We've had girls before but I personally find neutered boys to be the most chilled out.

Thanks for all your support @fieldsofbutterflies.

it doesn’t help that I’m going away this weekend, so leaving my husband and son in charge, and although they’ll try their best, they’re not the big cat lovers, I am, so I can’t really ask them to try any introductions or anything.

I think when I get back I might just have to try letting them meet again and see how it goes, and if jasmine really goes for her again we’ll have to think about returning her? 😭

No problem!

I really, really wouldn't recommend letting them meet again though - especially when Jasmine was clearly so distressed last time - it's not fair on Ella and she could get badly hurt if you don't manage to intervene on time.

I would think about maybe giving them a certain amount of time with feeding in front of closed doors and if by a certain date, nothing has improved then I would maybe look at returning Ella. She sounds friendly so I'm sure she'll be absolutely fine in home with a more accepting cat (or as an only).

I know you’re right, I’m just clutching at straws

If it doesn't work, it may be worth trying again in the future with a male cat.

There's quite a bit of research out there about how two females isn't a great combination.

https://www.petprofessionalguild.com/pet-owners/pets-and-their-people/pets-and-their-people-blog/ideal-pairings-to-consider-when-getting-a-new-cat/

I have introduced quite a few cars over the years. Usually, as I have several cats, I just let them get on with it and don't separate them. The only times I have taken it very slowly have been when I've been introducing an older cat (1yr - 18 mths) to the rest.

Vixen in particular was terrible. We kept her in a separate room but she still growled at the other cats and started growling at my friend and me too. He made a mesh door thing, like from a rabbit hutch but full size and fitted that in the doorway so that they could see each other without being able to fight.

The hissing, growling, and general anger went on for a good 3 months. I kept messaging the rescue to let them know and to ask advice but they said to just keep going with what I was doing. I honestly thought I'd have to give Vixen up. She was so affectionate in the rescue, grabbing you with her paw until you gave sufficient attention to her, but she just became an angry ball of hate.

Anyway, sorry for the essay, after about 3-4 months she just calmed down and the others accepted her. She'll now cuddle with Toad and is fine being around the others. I just wanted to show that it can work out but can take a long time.

Oh FFS. The first sentence was obviously meant to say cats not cars!

My dad has very kindly offered to make a mesh door like you describe @RumNotRun but if Ella’s showing signs of depression I’m not sure that’s going to help her as she’ll still be effectively shut away. I can’t let her be depressed for months on end, it’s not fair

I've never done the thing of keeping cats shut in separate rooms tbh. Despite initial hissing, growling etc, I've successfully introduced a few newbies. Distraction with treats and toys has helped, but otherwise I've taken an approach of letting them get on with it (but with close supervision in case things get out of hand). It might not work with yours, but it has with mine.

The gabapentin is working wonders for Penelope, she's almost back to her old self. And she's beginning to assert her dominance over Paddington. She growls at him, he practically shrugs his shoulders and walks away. Might be worth a try as a last resort.

@Toddlerteaplease that’s good news, although is there a chance things could revert once you stop the gabapentin?

Thankfully Ella seems a bit perkier today, I realised last night that the windows in her room had been shut all day yesterday, normally I leave them open a crack so she has air but I’d shut them when I was in with her the night before as it was chilly. So maybe she just needed aid after being shut in a stuffy room all day!

@coastergirl it’s really tempting to try your method but it seems to go against all the advice given so I don’t feel like I can risk it!

I am worried about that, yes. But I'm hoping that by that point, she'll have established her self as the boss. She seems to be doing it already.

The thing is these cats have already had a bit of a fight - putting them together again could be really dangerous.

How’s it going?

@learieonthewildmoor no change really, jasmine is still growling/hissing when eating on the other side of a closed door; to be honest at the moment I can’t really see that changing, I feel like we need to move on somehow.

My dad is hopefully brining round the new mesh door he’s made later today, I feel like we need to let them see each other again so hopefully this will help with that.

I know you're really keen to make this work but if Jasmine is still growling through a closed door then I don't see how moving to the next step is going to help

Jasmine could be an only child at heart.

The mesh door is a great idea. Jasmine may very well be cranky for a while - and something to keep them separated will really help. Have you been able to keep swapping them around so Ella can roam around?
It was very stressful introducing Cat Three and I was very disheartened when there was still hostility towards him, but once he was free range they settled down really quickly. Cat Two was still giving him bops on the head up to a year in, but by then it was funny. Keeping our paws crossed for you.

Hope there's good progress@Melon2312 , such lovely cats and your new little one is trying so hard to be a friend to Jasmine! Like a previous poster I do wonder whether Jasmine wants to be an only child......so hard, only time will tell x