Why do my “bonded” cats seem to hate each other?

[Catingle]

We’ve recently adopted a “bonded pair” of cats (a boy and a girl) from a rescue. They aren’t related but apparently got on very well in the rescue and were put together. We were told the used to nuzzle each other, sleep together etc. They were in the rescue for ages because they were insistent they should be homed together.

So now we’ve had them for two weeks. They’re very confident cats, have settled really well with us, love attention etc. BUT they just don’t seem to get on with each other. Particularly the girl cat attacks the boy - she tries to fight him, hisses at him, swipes at him if he comes close. The boy is a sweetie and seems completely bewildered by this behaviour.

What’s going on? And is there anything I can do to encourage them to become friends again?

Hi Allergic
In my life I've only ever had had two genuinely bonded cats. Two brothers who did everything together and always slept curled up with each other. When one died aged 17 the other one clearly really missed him and was never quite the same afterwards.
The rest of our cats have always rubbed along reasonably happily, but certainly couldn't be described as bonded.
I just tend to think that bonded cats are not that common, and rescues often label cats bonded simply because they don't actually kill each other 😹.

Totally agree Grumpy - I just got lucky I think with mine. I reckon their time as feral, with Girlcat looking after Boycat, had a lot to do with it. When they first arrived she was very protective of him, despite him being much the bigger of the 2 - checking things out first then encouraging him to follow, tending to ensure she was between me and him, guarding him while he ate and in the tray, even sharing Dreamies with him. As I've said on here before, he is very VERY thick and clumsy and we suspect he has had an injury in the past which has affected him.

As they got more comfortable here & it's become obvious that not only am I not an evil monster but their willing slave, she's stopped the protection & it's every cat for themselves when it comes to treats!

Thanks for all the advice - well at least it’s not that uncommon and it sounds like there is some hope they will come round!

I’ve had other people be cynical about whether it’s just a ploy by rescues to make out that cats are”bonded” just to try to get rid of more cats, but I think these two would have been really easy to rehome as singles but had been in the shelter for 6 months as a pair - they’re absolutely gorgeous cats but one is a youngster the other about 10, which is probably not an age gap most people would want. So I think they genuinely wanted them to stay together.

@Grumpyoldpersonwithcats Sadly I think this is often the case. It also means that folk who can’t afford two cats are denied one. My experience is that unless your life style means the cat would spend many hours alone, that they are often happier as a singleton and don’t feel the need for a feline companion.

@Grumpyoldpersonwithcats Ive just seen your last post. I have found that queens will “bond” and some of mine would bring their kittens up together but I think that hormones are a factor there. Once spayed they are less likely to welcome such close contact.
Recently a couple I know were persuaded to take a mother and daughter pair because of their close bond which, unfortunately, no ne has seen since they left the cattery. Cats don’t recognise any familiar bond once the kitten becomes independent and becomes a competitor.