How can I make my cats like me more?

[Obeythedancecommander]

After having the worst year of my life I brought 2 ragdoll kittens into our home 3 weeks ago, they are 23 weeks old so not teeny tiny kittens. My OH would not want any pets given the choice but I felt strongly about having pets and so, he had no choice. He vowed not to have anything to do with them what so ever and spent the first two weeks totally ignoring them. Even now he barely looks at them but will occasionally tell them to stop scratching the sofa.

Obviously the cats adore him and only look my way when I feed them. They occasionally come my way for scritches but it's him they wany really. Why don't they love me? I'm their food/poop slave and I know its early days but how can I make them like me more?

Not forgetting the rule

It’s very easy when you love cats you just want to scrummy up to them. But some cats (especially when new) just don’t want their personal space invaded.

Your OH is interesting/safe to them because he doesn’t seek interaction.

Watch or read about cat body language, and learn how to interact with them.

They are very beautiful.

This came up on No Such Thing As A Fish recently! There was a study that showed the amount a cat likes a person is directly proportional to how much that person like cats/thinks they are good with cats. But in the opposite way than you’d think ie people who love cats or say they’re good with cats aren’t liked by cats as much as people who aren’t cat people.

Cats basically like to be left alone.

One suggested way to win them over was to only give scritches when they ask for it and then only in safe zones (under the chin, no bellies or bases of tails).

I don't seek them out at all at the moment and just let them come to me but it's usually only to tell me they are hungry. I'm giving them space as much as possible but will make sure I keep the scritches under the chin (my childhood cat liked it behind his ears) when they want them

I've been watching Jackson Galaxy on you tube but will read up more.

I have a 2 year old ragdoll and she much prefers my daughter over me, much to my disgust!

She gives me attention when I feed her, take her out on her harness and give her dreamies but rarely cuddles me.

Just give it time and give them claps when they are all curled up and sleepy because they love that.

It looks as if they are bonded which means they have each other for comfort. Add in the fact that they are cats and therefore naturally aloof little buggers and you have your answer. However they may well become more friendly over time, once they're settled in and have become more used to you.
My girl cat now sits on my lap occasionally after several years of ignoring me. She's getting older and the cold weather plus blanket on my lap is appealing! (I'm under no illusions that she actually like me though)

It's the first law of catting - the adorable little bastards will do the opposite to what you want.

We have the same dynamic. I wanted cats, got cats and adore them. My husband refers to them both as "the grey one" (they are sisters but it is possible to tell them apart...) and has little interest in them but one in particular follows him round the house meowing for belly rubs. Contrary little bastards.

They look very happy with their new home & they’re gorgeous! Lying on their backs is meant to mean they trust/are content with they’re surroundings!

my Persian took ages to settle - but when she did, followed me everywhere! Give it time!

Play with them! Cats will love you for food but they will bond with you over play time.

Make sure you get some high quality play time with them each day, anywhere between 5-10 minutes (they get bored/distracted easily).

There's an interesting commentary on Netflix about cat behaviour. Giving them space, being a calm person, etc. It all helps make the cat warm up to you.

Try to sit in ways that make it cozy for the cats to come sit with you, or set up a cat bed or cat tree in the room you spend most time in.

Try not giving them attention until they ask for it.

"Your OH is interesting/safe to them because he doesn’t seek interaction"

This

Dreamies.

Haha. You love the cats. That's the rule. There's no rule saying they love you.
As the saying goes; Dogs have owners. Cats have slaves.

Ah they are beautiful. If it makes you feel any better , we rescued our cat 2 years ago ( he was found in a hedge in a box ) and as a thank you I get attacked every day , he randomly runs up behind me to claw me and bite my ankles 😩😂

Thanks everyone I'm taking note. These guys are my first cats as an adult as my childhood cat definitely belonged to my mum.

I wish I could get more involved with play time but my kids and the cats mutually wear eachother out chasing pom poms on a string. They have their morning zoomies session as soon as one of us gets up so I'll try getting up earlier to get some kid free kitten play time.

When we are home alone the cats will follow me around non stop room to room. As soon as oh is around they just stay with him and stop following me.

Can't be too liberal with the dreamies as they have very sensitive tummies.

They have done so well so far and are so tolerant of our children. The lighter grey faced cat is always sleeping on his back and they both purr very loudly often so we are definitely doing something right. I just selfishly wish they preferred me :D

But a Sherpa fleece hoodie wear it and don’t have the heating on - currently have four out of five cats fighting for space on my knee.
The other one has discovered the pile of jumpers Dh forgot to put away.

Get a heated throw. Especially a fleece one. It a teddy bear blanket. My cats adore the texture and will sit on it on my knee. Though one is a total cuddle chops anyway. I suspect your husband will soon be besotted with them.

It takes time but if you’re the one to feed them and give them attention you may just win them over! My first ever dream kitten, she wanted nothing to do with me and preferred my DP, it made me so upset at times I’m ashamed to say I’ve cried a few times!! Current cat, I’m
more relaxed and since I’m the one WFH, my rescue Ragdoll loves me the most 🥰 pic of the offender mid-yell for attention

Oh and also your kittens are lovely!

I was going to say play with them too but it looks like your children have taken on that role (good for them!).

I will say this, our cat used to spend months with me as her favourite including sleeping on my bed, then she would get bored and have DD2 as her favourite and sleep on her bed, then months later it would be DH turn. No reason why, it was as though a switched had been flicked. Either that or she was trying to share her love equally but over months instead of hours . Basically your time will come 😉

I'm super allergic to cats and literally can't look at one without having an asthma attack. My friend has two which means I can never go inside her house. That's okay! However, I only have to step on her drive and the buggers appear from nowhere, squawking and rubbing around my ankles.

Apparently they only do it to me!

So maybe your cats have the same opinion! Ignore them, casually throw food in their bowls, pretend they don't exist like your DP does and they'll love you and you'll be wearing them like scarves!! 🤗

OP "When we are home alone the cats will follow me around non stop room to room."

not an expert but doesn't affection come soon after that stage? They are adorable!

Ragdolls tend to attach themselves to one person and follow them everywhere, in my household it is my daughter.

When her favourite person is unavailable she will attach herself to me.

Those little feet! Oh my lord!

Your kittens are adorable😻

I have a r year old rescue ragdoll, I think I am her favorite person but frankly that doesn’t mean much. She likes a fuss occasionally but very much on her terms and the rest of the time, she likes us within sight but not touching distance😻🤣

DCat is awesome and we love her to bits, quirks and all. I think with cats you have to expect the unexpected and just accept whatever you get.

I’m sure your kittens adore you really😻

4 years old, not r years old!!