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Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

Original poster

My kitten died and I'm struggling

32 replies

mykittenisgone · 24/12/2021 05:29

My little 8 month old girl was run over on Wednesday and I feel so bereft.
She was the sweetest loveliest little cat I'd ever met and everyone loved her.
I'm not in a good place anyway at the moment but she was a little light in my life she made me smile so much. And now she's gone Sad . I saw her on the road and had to carry her away. Only minutes before she was happily playing with us. She's left behind her little brother who is missing her,. My young son is also heartbroken.
I'm trying to hold it together for his sake, and to try and enjoy Christmas. But I'm really struggling to come to terms with this I keep crying and miss her so much. I think struggle with depression anyway and now i think it's got quite bad as I'm struggling to function properly. I know it all sounds quite extreme I'm not sure if it's normal to feel this way. Does anyone know if this ever get any better and how can I move on? Sad x

OP posts:
MrsWobble3 · 24/12/2021 06:06

I’m so sorry. Not sure I have any advice but wanted to send sympathy. Try and focus on your son and remaining kitten - make their lives as happy as you can. In time you’ll feel better I’m sure.

Mollymalone123 · 24/12/2021 06:09

Oh bless you- that must have been so upsetting for you all.As other poster said,try and concentrate on the other kitten and your son-it’s ok to have a good cry too.

BlurpBlorp · 24/12/2021 06:23

So sorry OP that must've been so upsetting, and also traumatic for you. It's still so recent, no wonder you're still upset you must still be processing it. It doesn't sound extreme; you loved your kitten and if you're already dealing with depression it's going to be hard. It's okay to be upset, allow yourself to cry but perhaps save the big sobs for when your DS is asleep. Share happy memories of your kitten and snuggle her brother xx

DinkyDaisy · 24/12/2021 06:24

I am so sorry...
Not extreme at all.
Sitting here with my 3 month kitten doing the zoomies and I have such a fear about the front door and busy road. [Googling a lot around it].
He is indoors at the moment as not 'done' and considering a catio at the back.
But the front door is an obsession!
Be kind to yourself.

DinkyDaisy · 24/12/2021 06:34

Actually mine 4 months... [can't count!]
Hold little kitten brother tight and think of his future and keeping him safe. So hard as they are into everything.
What has happened is traumatic and anyone would be very upset.
Let yourself grieve whilst looking forward if you can.

Fluffycloudland77 · 24/12/2021 06:40

It’s normal, a lot of us on here have been blindsided by losing them.

You learn to live with it. I still blame myself for ours going.

Catios and cat proof gardens are the way to go. Anything to prevent this.

Shehasadiamondinthesky · 24/12/2021 06:45

Oh God Op I'm so devastated for you. Xmas would be over for me.

OhLookMoreShit · 24/12/2021 06:48

This is absolutely heartbreaking 💔 I feel like crying reading this I'm so sorry OP x

anotherbrewplease · 24/12/2021 06:49
Flowers

Sorry OP - that is very recent and sounds really upsetting. I don't think it sounds extreme either. I cried buckets when our cat was injured and had to have an operation.

Suzi888 · 24/12/2021 06:50

Flowers I’m sorry, how awful and traumatic.

You have to let yourself grieve, it will get better but will take time.

DinkyDaisy · 24/12/2021 06:50

Concentrate on your son and brother kitten and, by doing that, you can hopefully get through Christmas.
Plan for the future of the remaining kitten.
Be gentle with yourself.

hartof · 24/12/2021 07:03

I'm so sorry, my cat was run over in March and it devastated us. It does get easier but even now I have sad moments. I know how you feel right now, take it easy and focus on Xmas and your DS

Noseylittlemoo · 24/12/2021 07:06

I said goodbye to my cat 2 weeks ago. I was in pieces.He was older than your kitten but only 2.5 years old so still v young and unexpected. I still cried a lot over him but it's gradually getting less.
I had some of his photos made into a calendar . I saw other memorial type items you could buy and some of them had the quote "if love could have saved you, you would have lived forever". It sounds really corny but that really helped me. He was loved so much in his short life as I'm sure your kitten was too. X

TheCreamCaker · 24/12/2021 07:09

Oh, that's so sad. Sorry for your loss of such a young cat Flowers.

Igmum · 24/12/2021 07:16

So so sorry for your loss OP. Sending love to you and the Dkittens ❤️Thanks

Livebythecoast · 24/12/2021 07:37

Oh OP, how heartbreaking for you all 💔

I'm so very sorry for your loss. In time it will get easier but for now, you are grieving and that's okay, perfectly understandable.

Flowers
Caveofthewinds · 24/12/2021 07:41

How awful, so sorry to hear that. Allow yourself to grieve Thanks

BackBackBack · 24/12/2021 07:44

OP I am so sorry.

I had to have one of my lovely dogs PTS a week ago. Very upsetting and I miss her very much. But what I can say - from many years of having dogs - is that the grief you feel when you have to let them go and it's planned and managed, is nothing compared to the devastation you feel if you lose them unexpectedly.

It's normal to struggle and feel intense grief. I lost one dog very suddenly a few years ago. One morning he was fine, two hours later he'd gone. It took two years before I could talk about him without crying.

Be kind to yourself. When you can face it, find some nice photos of your girl and put them in a frame so that you have a lovely reminder of her. It will pass and lessen, I promise you, but it takes time.

GodspeedJune · 24/12/2021 07:45

I’m really sorry. I have a tiny kitten too and the thought of losing him is unbearable. I hope you don’t find this insensitive, but would it be possible to cat proof your garden or build a catio to protect your other little one?

I have adult cats as well as the kitten. They’re all house cats (with a catio) and they’re all living wonderful lives. It’s a myth that cats need to go free roaming outdoors at all.

Mumdiva99 · 24/12/2021 08:56

I'm so sorry fir you. Of course you are upset - that sounds perfectly normal. Look after you.

DinkyDaisy · 24/12/2021 10:26

I am looking into a catio from our back door. Will need to be narrow.
Strategies needed for front door obsession.
Have put tall stairgate on door to hall. Still issue though.
Planning for future, with remaining kitten may help.

Original poster
mykittenisgone · 24/12/2021 16:44

Thank you for all your kind comments x and sending hugs to others that have been through the same Thanksjust thinking of coping strategies now and getting through Christmas. I might put some photos together in the new year and we are going to arrange to pick up her ashes. Also going to try and celebrate that we had her even though it was for a very short time.
Feels like my world has been turned upside down and trying to hold back the tears (not very successfully at times), but hopefully in time we'll feel better x

OP posts:
Want2beme · 24/12/2021 17:08

So, so sorry. It's an awful thing and the loss is huge, no mistake about it. Over time it'll get easier to bear, promise. Take care of yourself over Christmas and give big loves to her little brother. He'll be a big help Flowers

Original poster
mykittenisgone · 24/12/2021 17:35

@Want2beme thank you x

OP posts:
lilly7221w · 24/12/2021 17:40

So sorry for your loss, pets are members of the family it's OK to cry. I lost my dog on Xmas eve a few years back it's heartbreaking.

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