Cats very very nervous, have we done the right thing?

[Rockbird]

Day three here. Firstly, they're our cats now, that won't change. They both had a rotten start and from now on they'll have cuddles (if they let us), fluffy blankets, lots of food and treats and everything they could want even if they never go near us. I want to clarify that. But.

They are still cowering in the far corner of the cage. They retreat when anyone tries to go near them, even to put food out etc. They came out for a wander yesterday evening but if we breathed in their direction they ran away, they won't let us near them at all. They just look so miserable. I know it's very early days but will they ever be happy here?

Poor things. I’m sure they’ll be fine, it will just take time. Keep doing what you are doing, give them space to investigate their new territory and they’ll come to you eventually.

We have had our rescue cat for almost 10 years and she is still petrified if we shake open the bin bag when she is in the kitchen - God knows what happened to her.

They're eating pretty well, using the litter tray like champs, so clearly there is hope. The dds are desperate to cuddle them and I think are a bit crushed by the lack of response (I know it's about the cats not the dds) but I suppose it's just so different to all the pictures I see of rescue cats being brought home and claiming the armchair before they're in the door.

Of course we'll give them time and let them settle at their own pace. It's just such a sad experience at the moment, for them as well as us. Sorry, moan over!

I could have written your post myself 4 weeks ago!
It's slow but we're making progress - mine didn't leave the back of a deep cardboard box during daylight hours for at least 3 days - now she likes to be underneath the dining room table where she can keep an eye on us, but she will come out to eat and drink, she doesn't need to watch us constantly - and I did see her flick a toy about out of the corner of my eye in the week!
When she gets brave and creeps out I still tend to keep quite still and stay where I am say so as not to spook her.
My hope is we'll get to the point where she will sit on the sofas - not necessarily the same one as a human - I'd just like her to be comfy!

One of our two stayed behind the washing machine for two days and then moved to under the bed/behind the sofa for about two weeks before she emerged tentatively. Almost a year later and she can still be nervous but is also wonderfully affectionate. Sadly she is now missing and I'm devasted after all of her hard work, but that's another story.

How old are your children? As hard as it might be, I would keep children away from the cats' room for now and keep the room as quiet and calm as possible. Are they in a separate room with a door or just in a crate in another area of the home?

You could try Pet Remedy plug ins in the room, most cats respond to it better than Feliway.

I was looking after a friends cat over the summer in my house. Even a well loved, spoiled rotten from birth cat took four days before she stopped finding places to hide in my house, and boy did she find interesting places to hide, she had her travelling palace to go too but that was too easy!

Just let them take their time, you will enjoy their company for many many years I hope, a few weeks settling in is nothing really.

Take the long view.

Thanks all. I am trying to be positive, really. I'm just having a moan on here. DDs are 10 and 6. Younger one is in charge (supervised) of breakfast and first lot of biscuits and older one does evening. I do litter . They're trying to be patient too because they know what a tough start they had.

They have a cage in the living room which can be shut off. They've been pretty much left alone apart from little visits by the girls. Last night we all sat and watched a film and they were a bit more lively - trying to play with the cupboard door knobs through the bars and watching Shrek . Then we opened the cage door and they ventured out into the room for a bit.

It'll be worth it I know. I'll keep repeating that.

It sounds like they are gaining confidence already. Keep doing what you're doing and I'm sure they will become confident and happy very soon.

Have you seen the feliway plug in? Sorry, I don't know how to link, but I had a couple when I first moved my very traumatised cat in, and it made a huge difference, he seemed much calmer and less nervous very quickly after I got them. I can't remember exactly how they work now but it might be worth a look. Quite expensive iirc but very effective.

Sounds like you’re making great progress. Early days. Tried the sitting near reading quietly and no eye contact? Or dangling something for them to play with? As they get more confident try the slow blink. Sounds mad but it’s a thing!
So pleased they’ve found you.

Our cat goes a bit like this when we move house and that's with familiar things and people about. It'll wear off.

It’s such a great opportunity to teach your girls the long game - patience, resilience and quiet determination- seeing the smallest steps of progress and building trust.

I’m sure the kits will end up adoring you all.

A friend of mine had a cat who wouldn’t come out when people were around. He slept in the room with the cat and after a bit of time, woke up with the cat snuggled against him for warmth. It grew from there!

They will be fine. Cats are wary creatures, they hide or run if they're ever worried. My cats were exactly the same. It took a couple of months before they'd come downstairs (I remember thinking that they never would!). They lurked in the half converted building site side of the house. Even when they started to come up to us they wouldn't come in the living room because of the dogs, it probably took another two months! Same again when we let them outside, they were terrified at first, having always been indoors.

Nowadays you'd never know. They're happy regular cats, inside and outside, snuggled up with us and the dogs in front of the fire.

Give them lots of time. They'll come round eventually.

It's really upsetting when they're like this. You just want them to be settled and happy. Some cats do need more time than others to get used to things. I've got a really scared cat, who jumps and runs away from most things and I've had her since she was 4 weeks old. My other cat came to me at about 2 years of age and has been a complete takeover bid since she walked in the door. They're all so different. You're doing all the right things. Maybe get the DDs to gently play with them a little bit, with a cat wand - feather on a stick, and to give them a treats.

One of mine hid for 8 days. Fortunately I was pre warned that she would hide, and to make the most of her sister. As she would completely take over. And she did! Took about a year to fully settle.

As a pp has said, it’s a great way to teach your kids that animals are sentient beings, not toys, and they have their own way of doing things

It’s only day 3 or 4, maintaining calm and letting them explore in their own time is the best way, a fishing rod toy will probably help as very few cats can resist!

Encouraging play with toys to get them out into the social space is a great way to build their confidence territorially and also build a bond with the dc. Use a toy like a feather on a long string on a stick so there's plenty of distance between the human and cat, to give the cat a sense of safety when venturing out.

They'll come around, and yes whilst nervous the fact they're eating and the fact they've started to explore a little in such a short time is 100% encouraging

OP , I read that you said that you opened the door for them to come out while you were there , one thing I would do is keep the cage door open all the time, that way they decide when they come out and go back in again, you can drape a towel over the cage to keep it private , but leave the open door only half covered. You might find that one is bolder than the other and will come out and explore while the other stays inside a bit longer.

Oh ok, the CP woman said to keep it closed. I'm happy to keep it open, would prefer it. My only concern is our open fireplace but I'm getting a guard for that anyway.

We have a fishing rod toy and they have responded to that a bit. I'm glad things sound encouraging though. I know I'm being impatient

We used cardboard to stop the little roads disappearing up the chimney. Ditto under the dishwasher and in the sofa.

Toads. Not roads.
Also sods. Buggers. Evils. And nightmares.
Love the tortie terrors really.

Our second was like this! Didn't think she'd ever come out from the corner - but she did under her own steam and in her own time

They'll get there :-)

Yes block up the fireplace! traumatic memories of watching new rescue disappearing up the chimney with spay scar stitch less but recent.

Luckily she decided it wasn't for her and came back down again, a bit sooty. Call to vet, no bathing because of scar but lots of wiping clean with damp cloths.

The girl is definitely braver. She was up on the window sill last night. The boy is a big fat wimp