My old girl pts today

[Shoegal0305]

So it's Sunday morning, early. My old beautiful girl is 19! She's been frail for a while, very unsteady, but eating and drinking. Last night she appeared to be off her legs. I've had a sleepless night, she now is struggling to stand. She isn't interested in food but if I take her to her water she will drink. She looks a mess bless her as she's had an ongoing eye infection so all round her eye the fur is matter with pus. She's pure white and of course it looks awful. But she's had antibiotic drops and I clean her with water wipes. All around her snout is a mess too as she's been unable yo clean herself after eating. Again I've been cleaning her myself. This morning she's struggling to stand and when she tries to walk she is falling to one side. The time I've been dreading has come. Rang the vets and they were lovely they've asked me to bring her down at 9, which is two and a half hours off. I'm on my own with my son (single parent) he's 16 and is really upset obviously he's known her since he was born!!! Please reassure me I'm
Doing the right thing I feel like I'm 'condemning' her to death! I can't see her struggle tho. Also feeling so much guilt as I feel almost 'relieved' as she has been incontinent around the house for a while And it's been hard work. Someone please help........

So sorry for your loss, hav had to part with a few cats in the last few years,the youngest being 6 from a heart attack, then 7 to kidney failure and 8 with heart attack to 3 more at 13,15, and 18, all are buried in my garden in one area, with markers and flowers,i just couldnt bear to leave them at the vets, but couldnt afford cremation
I held them all at the point of injection,and shed so many tears, some were very close together,as i had them all from babies
I know how you must be feeling now op, and its hard, but think of the happy times you had with her,and take comfort in the fact she had a good and happy life
I have 3 now all aged 9-10, and a little rescue dog aged 10,,and i am dreading when those days will come for you

Thank you. I had to get rid of her bed, my sister did it for me, I just couldn't torture myself by (very probably) crying into it later! X

Princess I'm sorry to hear of all your losses it must've been heartbreaking xxx

We've just been in your shoes - it's heartbreaking but it was absolutely the right thing to do to stop my DCat's suffering, as it is with your decision

She will always have her footprints right across your heart ❤️

Those footprints are heavy tonight 😞😞😞

Crying with you.

Dcat 😞😞. I am feeling very odd. No litter trays to clean, no food or drink to leave out, it's bloody awful x

So it's the first morning of getting up without her. Woke up and for a split second forgot! Then it hit me. I'm lying in bed and I actually feel like I have to get up ..... like I did when she was here, I had to get up to feed her etc. Am kind of dreading going downstairs. My son is still in bed and it's early. I'd often go down early and make a coffee and have cuddles. It's so strange. The fact that she's not where she has been for years, that there's no litter to clean, no food to serve........ 💔💔

My old boy was pts 10 years ago. I can honestly still remember every little detail of his face. When I think of him now I feel no sadness, just happy that I had him and he was mine. Lots of little steps OP. Get up, have your coffee and be kind to yourself ❤️

It's really difficult- I know. That split second when you wake and haven't remembered... I did find that in the days following the loss of our old cat, I realised how much I had been having to monitor their health, doing quite a bit in the way of extra care (which of course i didn't mind one bit) and generally been worried about the decline. It did help me to come to terms with the fact it was the right thing to do. Try to take it easy x

Thank you. I remember some morning I started work at 6am and it was a pain having to come didn't and empty litter trays and clean poo off the floor. Then I'd do all that and she'd go in the litter tray again!! Bless her. What I wouldn't give right now to have to clean a million different litter trays!!! X

A pain having to come DOWN! Not didn't!

Is anyone about??? I've got up and dressed and even put make up on which was stupid as most of it has ended up down my face!! I am an emotional rollercoaster. On the moments I feel peace and calm I also feel guilt. I keep thinking of my beautiful girl just lying in a fridge somewhere waiting to go for cremation. It's a beautiful morning she should be cuddled up with me. Then my sensible side kicks in and I realise that at 19 1/2 she can't live forever! I know death is inevitable with pet ownership. I always said I wouldn't get another cat and I certainly wouldn't yet but I'm already looking at rescue centres. Christ I'm all over the place 💔💔

Your beautiful girl is in your heart now. Don't mess with your head by thinking of the biological stuff.
Please look at getting some counselling from someone who understands. I can't recall it but I remember seeing something offered by cats protection or similar.
You will get to a more accepting place.

Thank you I'll look on their website x

I'm so sorry. It was the most awful feeling when we had our old girl PTS last year.
It is hard as even though you've done the right and kindest thing yes it does hurt. They do leave a huge hole and the first days are definitely the hardest.
Blue Cross and Cats Protection have bereavement helplines if you want to talk to someone? The vet we saw said not to underestimate the grief from losing a pet which is very true.
I volunteer at CP and my first shift afterwards was hard I ended up crying over a litter tray whilst cleaning a pen out but the cat gave me some therapeutic cuddles.
We adopted a young adult cat early this year which I'm pleased we did we or has helped-completely different character.
Look after yourself

Thank you. I've managed a morning with friends, not cried for about 4 hours! X

You made the most difficult, bravest and kindest decision for your cat. Take time and look after yourself x

Well done, op. Just for all of it.

I dare say I have lots of tears still to come xx

I've volunteered to cat cuddle at the local shelter today I sure do have a lot of cat love to give xx

Nice idea

So sorry op. We had our beautiful girl pts a year ago and I know how devastating it is. She was 14, had always been very healthy, so her short illness was a shock. Her decline in the last 48hrs was awful to see, you absolutely did the right thing, but I completely empathise with the guilt and agony the decision causes. Remember her often and be glad she was yours. Myself and my dds still weep over our girl 12 months on now and then, and likely will for years to come, the comfort we have though is our girl was loved for her whole life and treated like the queen she was!
for you.

Thank you she was indeed treat like a queen. And my boy was too. I don't think you deserve a pet if you don't treat them like royalty haha. Sounds like your fluffy friend was very much loved (and missed) too. I am trying to get out the house when I'm not working as I still feel I'm needed but then the harsh reality hits and of course I'm not. The house is so empty xx

I hope the cat cuddling is therapeutic.