Anything we can do to help our cat be less of a bastard?

[SharingMichelle]

He bites and scratches if anyone goes too near him. All kids have scratches, scars and scabs all down their legs / backs.

He lies in wait and pounces, and draws blood.

He pretends that all that is behind him and comes for a cuddle, and then turns into a razor-wire bear-trap when your guard is down.

He attacks and bullies nice cat constantly and I'm genuinely worried she might leave home.

He provokes unstable dog who then attacks him.

He charges around the house at night, smashing things and savaging toes.

He swipes the back of the cleaner's legs.

He smells.

He has questionable toilet habits and often walks poo around the house.

He wails and howls if you put him outside. If you shut a bedroom door he leans on it and yowls until you open it. He can keep it up for over an hour.

He gets stuck up trees. I have to use oven gloves to get him down because obviously he tries to savage me as I rescue him.

He costs a fortune at the vet because they have to sedate him to do anything.

He refuses to use the balcony to come in and out of the house (I think he might be afraid of heights).

He steals food. If I do fish or chicken we just have to accept that we have to shout over him yowling at the back door throughout the meal. If we let him in he crashes onto the table and makes off with food from our plates.

He refuses to give up his litter tray and go outside like nice cat.

I am horribly allergic to him and sneeze and snot my way through every day, taking antihistamines every day.

He is a weird combination of desperately needy, he refuses to be alone, but then is vile and violent to everyone around him.

But we do love him. We have to, because he is our cat. We can't get rid of him. We're stuck with him. Genuinely looking for serious suggestions as to how to make him slightly less awful to live with.

He's 1 year old. He's been snipped. He's got very dodgy eyesight.

It's recommended that you have litter boxes for each cat and a spare... I have never done this but some people seem to say it works.

Felliaway is great, expensive but really good - could you order in from the UK?

LEM and Polter - thank you so much for saying he sounds brilliant. He IS brilliant. We love him very much. He is so very alive and fabulous and 100%, and he makes us laugh a lot. Nothing dull about him. He is technically the cat of my eldest daughter (no one actually owns a cat like this) and his attitude to life helps her with her anxiety.

That's interesting Kittens. Is it said to help with anxiety, or territory or... hygene? Wondering how it works. Does it apply to cats who have access to outside?

I loath litterboxes, nasty smelly things. Happy to add another if it would help though.

What's interesting with Jackson Galaxy is that he often goes to homes and the vicious cat isn't actually the problem, quite often the other cat is very aggressive but not in an obvious way so the other cat reacts.

I've watched so many of his programmes now and they all follow the same pattern-

Each cat must have its own litter box
Each cat must have its own high safe space like a tree or shelf
You must play with your cat every day for at least 20 mins
You must rule out medical issues- a lot seem to need anti anxiety meds.

Within a couple of weeks nasty, vicious cats turn into gorgeous chilled lap cats , he's amazing.

I said I'd add a pic today. Not sure this pic shows quite how enormous he is.

"Every cat must have its own little box" - how do you police that? If I put out three, he would claim all three. Nice Cat never goes in his box.

And another

He's lovely :)

And Jackson is awesome!!

I had some issues with big girl cat getting the hump when little cat arrived and vet suggested that an extra box might help if she was anxious jealous or intimidated jealous I just gave her chicken and let her know she was still PFC (precious first cat) and used felliaway

Big boy cat (who is a massive lump) wasn't bothered by new cat at all, looked up as much to say "oh hello" and went back to sleep... He knows his place I think

Now very harmonious here, but it was a pain as she would wait for me to go near the boxes follow me, and sit and look at me as she peed on the carpet...

Just a few thoughts, sorry if others have said already. Does cat have a space in the home he can actually call his own? I'm just wondering if a cage (big and spacy enough for bed and food, maybe even litter tray) would help? Not to shut him in it but to offer as an open-door base-camp where he can always be secure and comforted by food. It could be located in your bedroom, as an example, as he seems to need company. Your sleep vibes might help calm him.

Zylkene is great stuff, you can get it from amazon. Some cats respond well to feliway too. Mine never seemed to notice it in the air. Catnip is brilliant too. You can get it in spray, bits to sprinkle everywhere and in toys.

Anti-depressants can surely be injected rather than having to wrestle with him? He must spend a lot of his time in fear due to his eyesight. Is there no hope of rectifying this surgically?

Thank you for loving this cat and sticking by him. And wow, I'd say Cat has some very distinguished heritage going on there! If it helps I have a naughty tortie who was vile for years. Time and constant loving has mellowed her.

I found Feliway useless. Give the Zylkene a good go before ordering anything else.

I am surprised that their are people on this board who will just say 'get rid' when it comes to challenging pets. I foster and have seen a huge range of difficult behaviour, but there are very few issues that can't be improved.

Wow emotions you sound like a fabulous pet owner. If it doesn't behave how you want it to get it put down. What a great solution that is!

Also referring to the ops children as fodder is pretty fucking low.

Op, I have experience of having an abandoned kitten as a pet. She wasn't nervous as such but a little wary of strangers and if she didn't want to be touched she would swipe at you etc. we found that in time she mellowed and we gained her trust, however she did like her own space and liked being left to do her own thing. But then again if she wanted a cuddle she would literally climb up you and try and sit on your head to get one. Weird but lovely she was.

We found that catnip helped weirdly. Maybe it just spaced her out a bit, who knows but she loved it and it did seem to calm her.

Would agree maybe try feliway but as they say time is a great healer so he might mellow as he gets older, start to trust more etc.

I cannot comprehend why anyone would consider putting the poor thing down, he's beautiful!

Yes littlerabbitface I am a fabulous pet owner, my pets are safe, fear free, happy and comfortable in their environment, they are not dodging out of the way of unprovoked surprise attacks, or looking to leave.

I would put an animal down that appears to be as disturbed as this cat is, if the OP's first post was completely true and not exaggerated for effect. I actually think it's unfair on the other animals to be tormented by this one, must be great for the 'unstable' dog to be made even more unstable, and the 'nice' cat to be constantly attacked and bullied to the point it looks as if it may well leave home, great animal love and care there.

I'm also a fabulous parent because I would never, and have never, allowed a set of circumstances to continue that would leave my children scarred, dripping with blood or crying on my knee purely for doing a simple thing like going into a room in their own home.

Clearly for the OP and several other posters on this thread the only thing that matters is this cat, it is the one that is most important and most worthy.

Ninja Cat looks sort of Oriental, Sharing.

When I first met DH, he always had scars on the backs of his legs, and he was amazed when MCat let me stroke him, he'd never allowed anyone to do that before. Now he's a clingy little being. but I am a tad wary when he sits on my lap

I think you're bloody brilliant for having patience with him, and not having him killed for scratching. It's not like he's a tiger.

Do try the Feliway and Zylene, if that doesn't work, some happy pills from the vet?

And like a pp said, a Flying Frenzy work-out a couple of times a day, with a food reward at the end of the session will help him to fulfill that stalk, kill, eat drive.

Re. the smelliness, have you asked the vet to check out his anal glands - like if they need emptying. Cats will also get a smelly bum when nervous, mine does at the vet.

He looks massive op. He reminds me of the cats you see painted on the inside of the pyramids.

...Oh, and maybe look at his diet if he's treading poo about the house, something cereal free. (cereals/grains can make them a bit "loose".) I'd recommend Applaws dry and Butchers Classic wet. You can also buy mats that his tray sits on, designed to collect anything of a poo-ish nature.

And the trays - they will share, but sometimes one wants to have a piss in one and crap in another. That's why it's best to have 3.

This is our bastard cat being love bombed. Note the firm grip on his front claws, or we'd have very shredded skin. The half closed eyes look is only because he was getting bored of glaring at us.

Love bombing is easiest when they are sleepy.

emotions this cat needs help not killing.

I hope you never have a difficult pet. You don't sound like a good owner at all. If something's not right get rid. No, you work on it.

Op has stated she's had many difficult pets and her kids know the score.

Dripping in blood is a bit of an exaggeration. The cat scratched the kid not mauled their hand off.

I'd explore all the options including re homing before I even considered getting an animal put down.

Even the most 'disturbed' animals deserve a chance.

littlerabbitface, I have had difficult pets, I have worked on animals, I would never just 'get rid' but I would also look at the bigger picture - the impact on other animals, and behaviour this extreme is impacting on other animals negatively. I would always try to re-home first but wouldn't attempt to re-home an animal as damaged as this one.

Yes 'disturbed' animals deserve a chance, but how far do you take that? Wait until the other cat has been forced out of the home because it can no longer stand being bullied and attacked? Wait until there is an almighty scrap between the dog and cat which ends in serious injury to one or the other? Are these other animals little more than bit players in the whole 'save this cat' story or do they deserve equal help and consideration?

Do you not think the OP's children should feel comfortable enough in their own home to go into the kitchen without wondering if the cat is in there and, if it is, is it going to launch at them?

Should the needs of all other animals and humans in this house come a distant second to this cat?

The OP said her youngest had been scratched and bitten and blood was drawn in four places.

OP seems to imply that the cat was abandoned by its' mother, sometimes mother cats abandon their young for very good reason and human intervention is counter productive.

Are you implying the mother left it because it knew it was disturbed and deserved to die? Dear god.

A lot of cats that act 'disturbed' I'm one household can be extremely content in another.

You don't know op may eventually (though she loves this cat so prob won't! And I don't blame her) re home this cat and he may settle in really well, become a loving cat and calm right down. He could be a companion for someone etc but you'd rather put him down than try and settle him elsewhere. Disgusting attitude.

Also please can you explain how you know how her children feel? I had many pets as a child and have been bitten scratched and pounced on more times than I've had hot dinners, and I never felt uneasy in my own home.

This cat probably isn't maliciously attacking children as you are imagining. Lots of cats see pouncing as a game for one thing.

This poor thing got abandoned and hand reared of course he's not going to be a model cat.

He's beautiful. Love black cats, we have two. A shorthair and a longhair.
We have 13 cats and they all have their own personalities. Adore them.

Ha - i have one of these - he was a feral rescue at 4 months old, but decided he wanted to be an indoor cat - however he just isn't cut out for it, he starts off all loving and won't leave you alone but quickly he bites and scratches, tries to trip you up and bullies any other cat around.

So he has his own space (util room) but isn't allowed in the rest of the house (OH allergic anyway) and I strongly encourage him to go outside during the day, he also gets squirted with a plant spray if he's getting rough with my little ones. It's a kind of compromise.

I agree you should try and get some calming stuff online, e.g.:

Vets4Pets Stress Relief (valerian-based)
Zyklene
Feliway

They have all worked for me.

One of my cats gets very stressed and weird if she even the sniff of a flea, btw. So we are somewhat obsessive about flea and parasite control to keep her relaxed, and keep her well fed and watered with various safe spaces to sleep in.

She's even had eye problems caused by her flea allergy.

They have all worked for me, on my cat

Wow, he's stunning! Reminds me of the classic Egyptian cats. Well done for standing by him, in a world where so many feckless owners dump their pets without a second thought.

Have to admit your OP did make me smile, apart from the attacking, obviously

Can't add any more to the great advice you've already had without repeating others but to give you hope we've had brilliant results from Zylkene. Also found automatic laser toys and flying frenzy type toys great for exhausting our naughty cat.

If all else fails, our cats have always mellowed with age! Usually becoming real cuddle monsters.

I know that you will, but please ignore posters suggesting he should join a feral colony. The fact he wails for you and makes an attempt to cuddle up, even if he gets over exuberant, means he is very dependent on his family and it would be cruel to drop him into such an unknown and unfamiliar environment.