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The litter tray

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

Original poster

CPL home check tomorrow

632 replies

MrsMoggy · 08/01/2016 18:52

Hi all,

This subject has probably been done lots of times so apologies in advance. Got a home check tomorrow for an indoor cat who we haven't actually met yet. What should I expect to be looked at and what questions may I be asked?

So far I have answers to where the cat would eat and use litter tray, where it could have privacy in first few weeks, what vets I may sign up to, feeding schedule, what I'm going to buy etc. can anybody think of anything else?

Thank you

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Thread gallery
16
FinestGrundyTurkey · 06/02/2016 20:30

You are very much not a crap cat owner! You're patient and kind and you're doing the best anybody could for her. Flowers

Sparklingbrook · 06/02/2016 20:30

You are not a crap owner. On that day you could just as likely have come back with a family friendly confident lap cat if the shelter knew anything about matching the correct cat to the correct owner. Angry They knew your circumstances. I feel really frustrated for you.

Fluffycloudland77 · 06/02/2016 20:43

I don't think the shelter had her long enough to assess her personality, plus she was ill.

My theory is kitten farm cat got ill, got handed in rather than drowned/abandoned & is now with you.

Unless she's spayed, then that's all bollocks.

If she's safe with her tray now I'd put your son back in his room, the cat downstairs in the kitchen overnight with her bed etc.

That way you relax more & she will hopefully follow suit. Their good at sensing owners moods.

If you want to talk crap ownership I can reel off my list of tails trapped in doors, windows, heads nearly severed by opening a drawer he was trapped in, the poisoned berries he ate, the time he fell off the conservatory roof, the time dh dropped him 6ft as a kitten, the night he fell out of a tree, the accidental face punches he got being too close to opening parcels.

SunsetDream · 06/02/2016 21:16

You've nursed her back to health. As I said before, there's nothing wrong with you being (in hindsight) a temporary fosterer. You and whichever cat you end up with owe it to each other to be rig for each other.

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 06/02/2016 21:50

You're not a crap owner! Different cats suit different owners and there's no shame if it doesn't work out. When DM got her cat I always said I would take him on if she couldn't look after him for any reason. Sadly I now know it wouldn't work as he cant stand the sight of me. I felt guilty at first but I've come to realise that him and I just don't get on.

Regarding taking the cat back to the shelter, if you do decide to rehome her (and I for one wouldn't blame you if you did, you've done so much for her) I wouldn't take her back to the shelter she came from. They sound incompetent at best, possibly negligent.

Good luck with whatever you decide Flowers

timtam23 · 06/02/2016 21:54

Hi MrsM, sorry things are still tough. You are doing really well with her but like Fluffycloudland I'm wondering if it might be better to have your son back in his own room and give the cat somewhere in the rest of the house? It can't be easy with all 3 of you sharing a room. And if you do keep Callie she would need to come out of your son's room at some point. I guess if she's not the right cat for your family then she may have to go back to the rescue but you are definitely not a "crap owner".

MiddleClassProblem · 07/02/2016 01:32

You are not a crap owner. She may have hissed as that room is currently her private space and he was coming into it. It won't last forever for multiple reasons: her confidence will grow, she will learn to read and predict his actions much easier, he will grow and become more and more responsible. It could take a while, it could take weeks, there is no predicting it. I think of you can figure out how to trust her with the sofa and get to leaving the door open soon that will help. If there is anyway to block it off or just the ways behind/over it or something like a throw you can put over it to get the worst if it happens again which it might not.

You really are doing so well and your son is lovely.

I would try to wait until the vet appointment to make a decision but if one day before then you think it's really not going to happen then take her back. You have done really well with her and given her a better time than at the rescue (she round probably still be on dry food there!) and you have learnt a lot.

Original poster
MrsMoggy · 07/02/2016 09:12

Sorry for the quick response am tying to get everyone ready for my nieces christening today.

I can't really wait til the vet appointment to make a decision as the main purpose of the appt is for her to be microchipped, so I can't get her microchipped to us if we don't intend to keep her at that time.

I appreciate all the advice and will do more about it tomorrow x

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RoastChickenDinner · 07/02/2016 10:01

Definitely not a crap owner! You have done so well by her, but it hasn't been an easy ride for you.

Given the circumstances the rescue may well agree to an exchange. I discovered there were undisclosed potential issues with PPG after we got her and that is exactly what we were offered.

Olinguito · 07/02/2016 13:51

When I wasn't sure whether I could trust a new kitten on the sofa I put a waterproof mattress protector underneath a throw just in case. Also I have placed a litter tray in the corner where a cat peed on the carpet in case she returned to the same spot. Perhaps if you did similar for a while you'd feel safer leaving Callie downstairs and could reclaim your son's bedroom?

Original poster
MrsMoggy · 08/02/2016 11:12

In the process of moving Callie into the front hall downstairs today so my son can have his room back. Got her bed in the washing machine, when she got out of it earlier I discovered she's been pooing in it there were lots of old pellets. Disgusting.

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Original poster
MrsMoggy · 08/02/2016 11:14

Sorry should have added that she's still been pooing and weeing in the tray too

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timtam23 · 08/02/2016 11:33

MrsM Flowers for you, you are doing well with Callie but please don't feel bad if it does not work out as I think she would be a challenge even for an experienced cat owner. I still hope things can work out, but if she is not the right cat for you you have still done your very best and she has made progress since that first day.

Original poster
MrsMoggy · 08/02/2016 12:39

I've pretty much decided that she will have to be rehomed at this point. I'm not sure where/when at this stage but sadly I don't envision her staying with us it's causing too much trouble for us all. Will keep her comfortable in the mean time while
I sort out what her future holds. I feel we've given it a good try but there has to be a limit . It's not a decision I've taken lightly and I feel very bad about it

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Original poster
MrsMoggy · 08/02/2016 13:32

She's just weed and pooed under my table again. Wish hadn't moved her now. She will have to go back to the rescue soon I can't be doing with this my house stinks and it's not normal

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PinkSparklyPussyCat · 08/02/2016 14:05

Please don't feel bad MrsM. You've done far more than a lot of people would and I can understand you've reached your limit. You have to do what is best for you, your family and Callie.

My big worry is her going back to the original rescue. I know the paperwork says she should go back to them but is there another, more competant and caring rescue near you? She needs specialist care and the original rescue doesn't seem to know/care enough about her to know what she wants.

Flowers
MiddleClassProblem · 08/02/2016 18:44

Don't worry, you've done so well. Fingers crossed if and when you are ready you will find your family pet (second child) x

FinestGrundyTurkey · 08/02/2016 22:07

You have given it a very good try, & it really doesn't seem as if she's been a proper pet cat at all - it sounds as if the bloke who dropped her off was spinning them a yarn Hmm

Original poster
MrsMoggy · 09/02/2016 12:42

Hello all,

Just spoken to the rescue we had Callie from and she is going to be going back there on Saturday. There's the possibility we may be able to "exchange" cats but I won't be doing this on a whim.

I know to some this will be a controversial choice after much discussion about the failings of the rescue. However it is the only place I know that has space, they've recently had new pens installed since we were last there, and despite my experience they actually have a good reputation.

I will be passing on everything I have learnt about Callie to the rescue in the hope this will secure her a better future home. She needs to recuperate for a while in peace. None of us really know where she has come from or what she has experienced.

I feel extremely guilty and sorry over having to return Callie but she must be so miserable to be acting the way she does. We have her for the next five days so I will be doing my best to keep her comfortable and safe and spoiling her with dreamies.

Who knows if we will decide we can take on another cat. At the moment I'm focused on finding this one a happy ending. Thank you so much everyone for all your support these past few weeks, I'm sorry to have let you down with no happy ending to the tale x

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thecatneuterer · 09/02/2016 12:46

You have tried your best. She isn't the right cat for you. You have done all you can for her and with the knowledge the rescue now has about her it will help them to find her the right home.

I haven't RTFT but I doubt this is the rescue's fault. They just misjudged her personality.

I hope you find the right cat for you.

FinestGrundyTurkey · 09/02/2016 13:21

The rescue taking her back is going to be the best thing for all of you & I hope in due course you'll be able to get a cat who fits your family Smile

You haven't let anybody down! Flowers

I hope the rescue will be able to put her in a foster home where they're used to looking after sad withdrawn cats & may be able to sort out her issues.

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 09/02/2016 14:26

You haven't let anyone down and Callie going back is going to be the best for all of you.

I agree with Finest, I hope that the rescue can get her in a foster home.

I'm sorry if I sounded critical about her going back the the rescue, I didn't mean to, I just feel they behaved badly towards you and Callie and didn;t seem to offer you much in the way of support Flowers

timtam23 · 09/02/2016 16:23

You absolutely haven't let anyone down MrsM, you have done a sterling job with a rather complex cat and you should not feel bad about having to return her - doesn't sound like she is ready to be in the midst of a busy family home and she may well never be that sort of cat. There will be a cat out there for you somewhere - but maybe at least a few cat-free weeks would be a good idea first? Caring for a sick or nervous cat is really stressful (having done both, more than once!). You have gathered some very useful info for the rescue & have nursed her back to health, you have been very caring and thoughtful towards her throughout everything. Nothing to feel bad about Flowers

MiddleClassProblem · 09/02/2016 21:38

I hope you feel a bit of a weight off knowing the decision has been made and I'm sure you will be more cautious if you do take the swap. Fingers crossed they gave a suitable match there. Make sure DS meets them too. You have done a wonderful job with her so I hope you're not too hard on yourself x

Original poster
MrsMoggy · 09/02/2016 21:45

I keep tearing up at the thought of leaving her there Sad I know it's the right thing to do but I don't want her to be afraid or lonely or feel unwanted. Feel sick about it. Poor cat

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