Letting him wander - I'm finding it hard!

[YoureAllABunchOfBastards]

So, cat has been with us for about two months. He is seven months old, utterly wonderful, chipped, neutered and jabbed, so we have installed a cat flap - one of those microchip ones that only lets him in.

He had a bit of a wander yesterday and then came in. Today he went out at 8.30am and has popped back a few times, but only to see we were still here, then buggered off back out. He had a little stand off with the local Bengal and seemed to hold his own.

DH and I are on hot bricks, though - keep looking to see where he is. Our previous cat was a house cat so we are crap at this. He'll be fine, won't he?

I know, I know, I am being PFB about him. Do love him though.

I can feel your pain - I've always had cats from kittens and have gone through this three times. It doesn't get any easier.

We've just adopted a twelve year old cat, who has so far (nearly 6 weeks) shown no inclination to go outside. But when he does I'll have my heart in my mouth.

We still worry every time he goes out, but he is much happier after he's been out.

We own a bengal so if you see one in a fetching pink collar it's mine.

As said above, it doesn't get much easier. You may stop worrying quite so much when they pop over the wall and out of sight - but if they're half an hour late for their meal? Yikes.

Sorry - it goes with the territory I'm afraid.

Oh when you let them out for the first few times it's just awful. Once they disappear from the garden. I was almost hysterical the first time my old cat went out. She jumped over the back fence. then ten minutes later was at the front door. Phew.

You will get used to it in time and will be letting him out without a second thought.

Well, he seems to have taken to it. He was almost at the top of a 30ft conifer trying to catch crows. Fucking hell.

Oh no. Fearless feline.

It's so difficult, isn't it? I hate letting a 'new' cat go out for the first few times. I have 'heart in mouth' too. My precious girl is now 4 yrs old, and despite having been letting her go out since she was 7 months, I'm always happier when I know where she is.

Cats are not familiar with health and safety.

It's when you move house too. DCat1 wen out and ran off and I didn't know if she's be able to find her way home, even though this was the 5th house move she'd done and one was to move 8 houses down a terrace (when we got her pregnant off a neighbour who was moving abroad).

I fretted, grabbed a torch, called for her (she was named by a squaddie after an alcoholic beverage) and fretted some more. She came home. She's sitting on me now.

It doesn't get any better.

Oh this was me a few months ago! I have a 7 month old female kitten and she's been with us since 9 weeks old. She's very much 'my' cat - (typical tortie - nobody else is allowed to touch her!!) so I was really PFC when she got spayed and it was time to let her out into the big wide world!! After a few weeks it did honestly start to feel normal seeing her disappear over the fence and I knew she'd come back after her wandering..

He will be fine but I know how you feel

This morning he buggered off out, then DS1 let him back in through the cat flap - he can go out, but hasn't quite mastered getting in. Then he went out again, but when DH went to work he was sitting on the front step and legged it in. Cat flap then shut as they were chopping down an enormous tree down the road and he is a nosey little sod.

If he can go out through the flap, he must be able to come in, mustn't he? Is he just lazy, or dim?

Why bother going through a flap when the concierge is there to open the door?

I've lost two cats in the last 9 months, they both went out one morning and didn't come back.
I'm so nervous of letting my little girl go out now, especially on evenings like tonight when I was calling her for half an hour and she didn't appear.
We've got one of those microchip cat flaps, so I live in hope of my boys coming back, although my dh would have heart failure having three cats.

kelp I also lost 2 young cats in the space of 9 months. Two young males, who - despite us living in a quiet village - both managed to find the main road, where they both lost their lives in almost exactly the same spot. Absolutely broke my heart.

However Lady of the Manor Cat, who's clearly got more road sense (fingers crossed, touch wood etc) regularly sends my blood pressure dangerously high if she's 15 mins late home for her tea. After what happened to the two boys, it was very tempting never to let her out again, but it wouldn't have been fair, she already knew what "outside" was all about, and would have been miserable if we took away her freedom.

kelper you're right, it is stressful when they don't appear especially when it's getting dark and late.

Our kitten was on a mission today - must be a lot of birds around as she's been out most of the day and only just come back. My heart has been in my mouth all evening as its her first time out in the dark! I can't believe I've added any more extra stress to my life but now she's snuggled up she's so worth it

So sorry about your boys though kelper and Petal - must be heartbreaking

Oh yes, they're most definitely worth it. My cat means the absolute world to me. God forbid the need ever arose, but I'd take a bullet for her.

Silly little sod STILL can't get back in through the flap. How do you teach a cat?

Put a plate of warm rotisserie chicken down next time he's out and won't use his flap.

My cat pulls the "I don't like my flap" routine with other people but not me because he knows I won't fall for it.

When you say he can't get back in through the cat flap, do you mean he's not trying, or is he making unsuccessful attempts?

He shoves a paw in, but needs to butt it with his head. Going to have a practice this weekend.

He's getting you well trained, Youre.

I know. We are totally under the paw.

Have you tried propping the cat flap open slightly, in the "coming in" direction, just to give him some encouragement? I used a clothes peg.