Cat steals Christmas Ham

[pinkhalf]

I have just come home and found a fresh ham, studded with cloves on the hall runner. One pleased looking tom cat sitting nearby.

Previous gifts have included a bottle of bicycle oil, a twig, and some frightened looking rodents. But the ham probably belongs to a nearby lunch! I'm imagining a party of disappointed faces!

Anyone else have a magpie cat? And can you do anything about it, its going to get embarrassing if he breaks into houses and starts rifling around their kitchens on a regular basis...

Oh I bet he was dead proud of himself getting that ham!!!

Train him to steal money

I would howl about that. We only get live creatures, no food yet, maybe give him a shopping list and direct him to the naice houses.

Am thinking someone's going to be in trouble for snuffling a whole ham though when thy genuinely haven't nicked it, coud you check with a couple of neighbours see if they are missing their tea :)

Check with the neighbours to see if they are missing their main meal.

Is it cooked?

So do we wait now for a thread titled "where did my ham go" ? :o

Is it ham in Cola?

Yes, its cooked in a honey glaze with quite a lot of ham having been eaten by the thief. So I am not sure its true owner will be wanting it back in a hurry.

I did knock next door, they laughed and said no, I knew they had guests for lunch today. I live in a terraced road so there are 47 others to go...

The thief is lying asleep with his four legs in the air. He is soo pleased with himself.

Laughing fit to bust here. I've had some odd 'presents' but never anything like that!

Not sure that there's a darned thing you can do about it when you have a serious thief opportunistic cat in the house - particularly when he knows that he can acquire such tasty goodies.

I'm assuming you have no cat flap at the moment?

That's hilarious!
My cat came home with a spoon attached to the magnet on his collar once, bless

Pah, give it a quick rinse under the tap and then ham egg and chips for you tonight

I'd be mortified. Your poor neighbours - those hams cost a fortune. I'd be knocking doors until I found out who it was and offering to buy them a replacement. The cat can't have carried it far.

It's not funny imo, can you imagine if it was you who'd lost it? You wouldn't be laughing.

This has made my day!

My mum's late and much lamented cat presented her with half a leg of lamb one Easter Sunday afternoon. It was a little muddy and adorned with bits of grass and assorted leaves alongside the sprigs of rosemary and cloves of garlic. He had clearly liberated it from someone's window sill or kitchen counter, and he had to have lugged it over walls that are over five feet high just to get it into her garden. He was ever so pleased with himself and though he hadn't eaten a bite out of it mum felt it would be too much to try to return it to whatever neighbour was its rightful owner, given the mud and slobber and everything.

Cut off the meat and freeze it in containers or plastic bags. If you have to replace it, then at least you've got some offsetting savings on cat food. (And by the time he's finished the darned thing he'll never nick another ham.)

(Sadly, that won't necessarily stop him from nicking a turkey next time!)

I want to train my cat to steal good food.
Not much use really though since she's an indoor cat, and all the food she steals I bought anyway!
She particularly likes mushrooms and parsnips
I'm not so keen on her games of 'throw and catch the mushroom on Netto's bed at 3am'.

I am weeping with laughter reading this!!

Naughty pussy!!

haha wonder how it got it out the house though, would it have pulled it though an open window? an intrigued by this now

Yes,definitely thread of the year so far - cat steals naice glazed ham

I think I would have paid good money to watch him dragging the thing along the ground as fast as his little legs would carry him!

Ha! I've heard a story of a cat that regularly liberated freshly cooked turkeys, still in foil, from the local pub kitchens. He'd bring them home without so much as a nibble missing, but would loudly demand the foil be removed once home.

When I lived with my parents my cat came home with 3 large Koi carp over a few days. I'm surprised he didn't get shot as I think they are quite expensive! No idea where he got them from though.

It's not mine

Fab thread

Put Malinki on his nametag?