Outdoorsy Shite Top Trumps: March

[Slubberdegullion]

Flora or Fauna.

Extra points for a photo.

Handicap will apply to those in Forrin. Monthly win will not automatically go to, for example, a Cougar spot. The Cougar will need to be doing something awesome, like fighting a bear or doing sudoku.

Don't mock the sparrows!

I've really enjoyed the soffits and the grykes. Thanks for those.

They do sound like they should be very exotic nature spots. I think a soffit would be some kind of a dormouse, and a gryke would be a wading bird.

I wish there was a roaring with laughter emoticon because you have just made me do that!

Definitely a wader which spends its summers in the High Arctic (I adore that phrase)

I think it would be a smiley face, but in sad blue rather than happy yellow, and wearing a scout hat (for the outdoorsy aspect).

Will it have a woggle?

Good thinking. Yes, a woggle, and possibly a scout pole.

Oh ffs with yer grykes. I know what them are. But PUFFINS. Oh lord (weeps a bit) they are my favourite, favourite, favourites. And I speak as someone whose other favourites are elephants and tortoises,the former of which I have seen trillions in the wild, and the latter a couple.

But puffins. I did Skomer a few years ago and saw puffins galore, but one can never have too many.

I am totally top trumped.

Now if only I could see a penguin surfing through a Cornish wave, my life would be complete. That WOULD be a trump worth having.

As it were.

Lets get our topic past MNHQ before we start demanding special emoticons, shall we? And anyway, Northey can paint the picture with words too well to need one.

Quite right not to mock sparrows - they're a red-listed species. They may be common but they're less than half as common as they were 25 years ago.

One more word on grykes - Ariels link put them at about .5m wide. Mostly I'd have said narrower. A typical gryke is roughly the size of a standard dachshund - which makes walking a somewhat clumsy standard dachshund across a limestone pavement a little worrying for fear of it falling and becoming wedged.

And finally...yes of course I'm of the puffin too. Only ever seen one once (off Anglesey)

Can I join in this late into the month?

Red Kites today, a small grouping of maybe five, all swooping on one another and shrieking their heads off. You get some very dramatic displays of swooping and shrieking at this time of year.

best not point out that in fairness, Red Kites are dead common round here, in case I get disqualified

I'm sure any time in the month is fine - the more the merrier. Though how the hell anyone is going to judge this I don't know (or did I already win with my Ice Cream Van Man?). Where's the kite-rich 'here'?

I may have seen a puffin today, but I have never in my life seen a red kite. I've heard their wings look as big as barn doors.

I guess one person's rarity is another person's everyday occurrence.

'Here' is edge of the Chilterns, Grimma. The blinking things were reintroduced from Spain (apparently Wales clung onto their aboriginal Kites and wouldn't let us have any ) and have done indecently well. They're now seen further south than Reading, a long way up the M40, and are alleged to follow the rail lines west. At any given time, I can look up and see at least one Kite, but probably more like half a dozen. Tis fab.

Speaking of our new topic, when can we next politely ask MNHQ for an update without being annoying?

I mean, it needn't be brand new. They could just change the name of this one if they liked. Though then it might be in the wrong folder I suppose. Oh I don't know.

I had to defend our honour the other day as someone was discussing a cull of redundant topics, and specificaly mentioned World Cup 2010. I suggested they popped over for a look at our sit-in. I think they were quite impressed.

I started the Fellwalkers4Justice one last Tuesday I think so this Tuesday we should ask again.

Or we could just kidnap JustineMumsnet and send them a ransom note.

I've placed an ad in The Independent about Mumsnet's anti-externalist/outdoorsy prejudice and calling on the manufacturers of technical footwear to withhold advertising, so we're sure to triumph now.

It just shows a picture of a sad-faced walker with words like "squirrel-botherer" and "get indoors you fresh-faced freak" scribbled on it.

Having a dreadful morning here, so I am going to go and cheer myself up with lambs.

Not a lamb to be seen yet, here in the Pennines. Those that have been born are still indoors I believe.

Must get out more.

Lololol @ the ad in The Independent and squirrel-botherer. We should focus our ire at Aldi who do adverse on here and are well know for lovely Thursday Specials of gaiters and fleece apparel.

First wild primroses of the spring spotted today. Obv these are rubbish up against a bloody puffin or even a gryke but I care not.
They are so very lovely and spring-like I was fully spiritually uplifted by them.

Lots and lots of fluffy lambs today, lambing is over for the year down by the beach. Umm apart from that good nature spots a bit thin on the ground, one jelly fish, dead, one starfish, dead, lots of seagulls and two ponies. I think my best was a very fat bumble bee on a catkin, made me feel all spring like and happy