Nervous new puppy not eating or drinking and scared of lead

[BlueBoy2]

I have just brought home a 16 week old cavachon and hes really nervous. I thought he was 14 weeks but when we worked out date of birth it was 16 weeks.
We tried to ut a lead on him and he freaked out. He won't eat, take a treat or drink.
Im worried he has t been socialised at all even though breeder said he was.
What do I do? How do I introduce him to anything I can't even get him on a lead?

You return him to the puppy farm breeder you bought him from - and I don't say that to be horrible or harsh but just to be honest. 16 weeks and that scared of basic things (and not eating or drinking) is going to be a nightmare to manage even for someone experienced.

Someone will come along and say 'he'll eat or drink when he wants to.' And that's just wrong. All healthy and happy puppies want to do is to eat. If he's struggling with that, you've only just touched the tip of the iceburg - I predict horrible health conditions in his future as well as well.

The breeder absolutely has not socialised him in any way, shape, or form. I can guarantee that. Sorry OP, but you've been had.

A lead will take time. You have to gently introduce it over a matter of weeks. Let him sniff it, sit next to it, keep it in the bed with him. Keep it out on the floor so he gets used to seeing it around and not as a threat. When he's comfortable being around it, put it on him, treat him then immediately take it off. Do it three times a day until it becomes comfortable. If he gets weird about it, take it back a step. Dogs do not innately know what a lead is or how it should be used.

Not eating or drinking is typical for new puppies. They have just been removed from their siblings, their parents and the only environment they knew since birth. Mine actually was so nervous he developed colitis, due to this and teething, but is fine now.

If you have a puppy gate, put it where he can see you through it but not necessarily in the same room so he can have time to process. Give him a bed, toys, water and whatever else and talk to him through the gate. Pet him, etc.

All sounds perfectly normal.

It is normal for a 16-week-old puppy to be scared, as this age coincides with their first major fear period (typically 8–11 weeks) and the critical socialization window closing. At this age, puppies are often overwhelmed by the sudden change in environment, separation from littermates, and new sensory inputs.
To help your puppy adjust:

• Follow the Rule of 3s: Spend the first 3 days ignoring the puppy (aside from feeding/potty breaks), the next 3 weeks building trust through routine, and the following 3 months for them to fully settle in.
• Provide a Safe Space: Create a quiet, comfortable area like a crate or pen where the puppy can retreat without disturbance.
• Use Positive Reinforcement: Reward calm behavior and any approach with high-value treats (e.g., cheese, hot dogs) or gentle praise; avoid forcing interaction.
• Avoid Overstimulation: Limit visits, loud noises, and new experiences initially; introduce new sounds like vacuums gradually from a distance.
• Modify Body Language: Approach sideways, avoid direct eye contact, and do not reach over the puppy’s head to appear less threatening.

If the puppy shows no improvement after two weeks, or exhibits signs of illness (lethargy, refusal to eat/drink for >24–48 hours), consult a veterinarian or a certified dog trainer to rule out medical issues and address behavioral concerns.

He is hiding in a crate he won't come out for food or drinks. I can't get him to take a treat and I can't get him to go outside for a wee. When my husband picked him up he yelped

I agree with first poster and would return and spend some time researching a decent breeder. You didn’t even know the puppies true age. You have also missed a crucial period of socialisation as you have got him late on.

@LuvMyPuppers that doesn't apply to puppies that have been re-homed way past their fear period. At four months, a puppy has exited it's first fear period and is over two months away from their second one.

I think Chat GPT did you the dirty on that quote as it's just so fundamentally wrong on healthy/happy puppy raising I don't know where to begin. It's horribly out-dated, factually incorrect and clearly AI generated.

@BlueBoy2 your puppy needs to be returned. Please do that now. And report the breeder to the local council for animal abuse. Because this is not normal.

Well, he sounds scared. The "breed" suggests that you bought him from a backyard breeder/puppy farm and I'm sorry about that. The behaviour is typical for a scared dog. I'm pretty sure, as @TheHungryHungryLandsharks has already stated, that the baby hasn't been socialised beyond the immediate environment.

It will take time to help it out. It's not insurmountable but it does require patience and dedication.

Have you had it checked over by the vet? Do you have puppy insurance?

Hey there @TheHungryHungryLandsharks I disagree. I used AI because it aligned with my real world experience. My dog was 5 months old when he was brought home and was having similar issues. There are variables. However, I do agree that this dog was not purchased from an ethical breeder. If the option to return is there, I would take it, but I also wouldn't seek to get another puppy using the same route that was taken to acquire this one. Education is a must. Come back here, OP, before purchasing another puppy. We will all help you avoid avoidable mistakes.

What do I say when I call them?

This is very worrying. I’ve raised several puppies and none of them have been scared like this - they’ve wanted to explore and sniff, and been generally starving. If he’s yelping when picked up there could be something medically wrong with him, poor thing.

Probably a stupid question, but did you not meet the puppy before buying him?

So many questions..

Did you meet his mum and littermates?

Why was he still available for sale at 16 weeks, had someone else returned him?

Where did you see him advertised?

How long has the puppy been with you? And importantly, how long has he been without water? A young puppy refusing food and water warrants a veterinary discussion in the first instance- things can go south quickly and you have no idea if it’s ‘just’ nerves or an underlying medical issue

longer term, I strongly join the chorus saying return the puppy to the breeder

So i called the breeder who said dog was 100% nothing wrong with him give it a few days. I thought she was quite defensive. Dog still hasn't drank so at least 7 hours. Wouldn't answer when I said can i bring back

I feel so stupid I didnt see the parents, I just feel like an idiot. What can I do now?

Yelping when picked up is a huge red flag
He's either hurt or really very scared
I would try and get an emergency vet to come out instead of taking him in to save some stress and check him over.
Assuming he has insurance from the breeder coming home?
If he won't pee or poo he could have alot of pain from holding on and it could cause a lot of damage if he's not drinking its still very warm

Turn the lights down, have some music playing low and sit near the crate but not looming over the entrance, make sure food and water are available make it as a calm as you can and prepare for a long wait.

My youngest dog had almost zero socialisation before coming home but he was not anywhere near as bad as you are describing
he had a very sheltered start being born on a farm in the middle of nowhere, never saw another human other than the couple but was loved and cared for and it shows as while he was timid he was exploring as soon as we got home and doing all the normal puppy behaviours, he's a bit clingy with me still but all my males have been clingy. His mum was a loved and healthy member of the family.

What you are describing is not in any way normal for the pup

You need to think now whether you return the pup, find a rescue or if you want to deal with a dog that's not been socialized and could be reactive or have health issues growing up from bad breeding for the rest of its life
While the best thing to do would be to return the pup let's be honest how many people could actually take a puppy back to a bad situation and leave them there?
It's one thing to say do it, it's another to have this tiny creature and pass it back to someone who you know will not have its best interests at heart.

What was the puppy like when you collected him? How did he interact with the breeder? Was he excited and friendly or quiet and trembling?

How far away is the breeder? Close enough to just turn up on her doorstep with the puppy? Although I doubt they will give you your money back.

You didn't see the parents - WOW !!!

I really hope puppy came with 6 weeks free pet insurance as you may need it.
read it's small print and check it covers you from day 1

then take it to the Vet tomorrow for a check up and to register it with your Vet.

Why oh why didn't you ask for advice here before you went out and bought a puppy...

Was about an hour away, I dont think she will give me money back.
Im not experienced at all with puppies and I just feel like an absolute fool. Is there anyway I could save this? He's up on the sofa now being rubbed but he hasn't eaten or drank which is a real worry for me.
No insurance

No insurance - WOW

You need to report her to the local council for animal abuse as a first step in the morning

Sounds like you have no puppy contract and no way to return the puppy. So, you need to take it to the out of hours vet right now. Seven hours is a horrifically long time for a puppy not to eat or drink. It’s already dehydrated (6hours is usually the max). If you wait until morning it could very well be dead.

Everyone else on this thread - be quiet. OP has cocked up massively but criticising her is not going to help the puppy or her I’m usually the first to stick the knife in (so to speak). But now isn’t the time.

@TheHungryHungryLandsharks - Shan't. 😝

@BlueBoy2 He's 16 weeks, not 8 weeks so I don't think it's as urgent as HHL says. But you could phone the OOH vet for advice if you are already registered with one.

What are you trying to feed him? My puppy wouldn't eat the food provided by the breeder and barely eat for the first three days. She was fine once I switched to a different brand. You could try some scrambled egg or white fish if you have it.

I would advise to just take things very slowly and at the puppy's pace. As tempting as it is, don't overwhelm him. Give him space and let him come to you. And don't worry about the lead for a week or so. He needs time to get used to the house and garden before he ventures into the wider world.

Are you sure he has been vaccinated? Did the breeder give you his vaccination card?

@SpanielsGalore obviously not you 😀just the unhelpful questioning posters (time to berate OP is later, not now).

First step would be to see a vet ASAP. It's unlikely he's been fully vaccinated and his reluctance to eat and drink could be a symptom of something else going on.

He's ate some wet food rather than dry. Drank a few sips and seems to be ok running around outside with daughter but not weeing yet.