I’m frustrated with the dog

[Berrytea]

She is elderly. She has expensive health issues so she can’t be sold or given away. she does have a basic enough understanding of a number of commands, but she only listens when she wants to and is very defiant! I’m not rich and don’t have the money for a professional.

My problem is she has relatively recently started going to the toilet on the carpets in various places. I’ve been using a dog cleaning spray but she has done it so much that it’s unsanitary stinks and it’s making me ill, what’s worse I can’t replace the flooring for about 4 months at best. I have issues with my memory and ability to pay attention because of tiredness so sometimes forget to shut the door and that’s when she goes in! She has a mat in her “place” that was she using as a toilet before but for some reason has chosen other places to go. When this issue started I was keeping her in a pen and not giving her roam of the house and I was told that it was cruel. But I think it’s crueler to make me unwell. I wish she would understand what I am telling her.

Your poor dog. I lost my dog a week ago and would give anything for him to be here. He wasn't even that old but more than be inconvenienced by his ill health I was worried sick about him.

You appear to have zero compassion OP.

Don't get any more pets after this one OP, let alone a partner or children who may also cause you inconvenience in time- such is life! Have you actually tried to responsibly rehome her? There is a charity called oldies who try to find homes for older dogs https://www.oldies.org.uk/
There are some lovely compassionate people out there thankfully

You sound delightful! I feel sorry for the dog! Poor thing

Pets get senile and dementia too.

My friends mum was stood in front of the kettle crying because she forgot what to do with it to make tea.

Your dog has probably forgotten how to ask to go to the loo.

These things happen.

Are you walking her less or not as far, you might want to walk her a bit further until she’s done all her business. Although sometimes it doesn’t work and they hold on until they get home as they are senile.

Mt friend used puppy pads to try and give her places to pee but I don’t know if that’s a good thing or not.

You do need to take her to the vet and get her treated, perhaps tested for uti or bowel issues. She could just need medicine. They couod test her hearing too.

It’s not cheap but we buy pets for life and vets fees are part and parcel.

If she can’t be helped by medicine it could be best to out to sleep. There’s no point in getting angry. She’s not trying to deliberately piss you off. She’s just old and perhaps has medical issues.

We used nappies on our dog for the last 10 months of his life, as long as you wash (I used wet wipes) regularly and allow some periods without to air, it works well.
He had multiple health issues as well. Miss him like crazy.

How is it making you unwell exactly? And if she wasn't omd you'd simply sell her on? wow.

She's an old lady, have some compassion.

Take her to the vet to check her over.

Sounds like you're drumming up the 'making me unwell' excuse to justify something.

God you make me feel sick. Tough, Suck it up !
Don't have another dog.

wow. You disgust me. My last dog had dementia and peed all night. I slept (or rather didnt sleep)with her on the uncomfortable sofa, for six months before her back end went and she had to be put to sleep. That’s just what you do for a sentient being you love.

This is the reality of having a dog, it’s tough, but you signed up for it. She’s elderly and has health issues, it’s not defiance, it’s her body failing her. Keeping her in a pen isn’t the solution; she needs freedom to move, especially at her age. She might even be deaf, so cut her some slack.

There are plenty of products you can use to clean the mess, stop making excuses. She needs you now more than ever so step up or you might regret it OP.

Everyone and everything changes as they get older. People do, and so do our dogs.

My girl is nearly 15. For the past 2 years, she gets up in the morning and has a wee in the garden... comes back in the house and has a poo. She sometimes poos when she is eating her dinner. I just clean it up with no fuss. It is not deliberate and she is not in trouble. It is just part of them getting old. We sign up to this when we first get them.

I don’t think the OP is coming back.

Hopefully she will act on these comments and show some compassion and love to her poor elderly dog.

You’re doing your best in a tough situation, and it’s not cruel to set boundaries that protect your health. Managing an elderly dog with health issues and incontinence is exhausting, especially without resources. Limiting her space isn’t unkind—it’s compassionate for both of you. You deserve support and rest too.