How to say goodbye

[FluffyMcFlufferson]

Trigger warning pet euthanasia

Hi I could really do with advice /experience on dealing with how to let DS6 know our dog will be going to heaven and also how to help him say goodbye on the day.

it’s a few weeks away yet but getting stressed on how do deal with this, he absolutely will not be coming to the vets but do we tell him the morning of the day so he has most of the day with her or would a few hours warning be better?
if anyone has experienced this recently could share their experience on what they did I would be very grateful.

Sadly it happened while she was at school. I picked her up from school and told her after we drove home, so we could talk about it.

Maisey went peacefully over rainbow bridge last night. Thank you all for your words of advise x

I’m so sorry for your loss OP 💔 Maisey is beautiful and so, so loved, I’m sure all she knew was your love ❤️

Sending so much sympathy on the loss of your beloved Maisey. She looks like the best dog in the land and you will always love and miss her. At rest now Maisey ❤️

@mummytoonetryingfortwo @thecatdiditthank you for your kind words.
Her dementia made her pace around almost constantly, her little legs must have been so tired she can finally rest them.
The tippy tappy sound of her pacing around used to drive me up the wall but the house is very quiet without it.

Oh @FluffyMcFlufferson wee Maisey is beautiful. I'm sorry that you've had that final journey with her in this life. Thinking of you all.

She looked such a gentle soul op.

So sorry for your loss...

I’m sure this is meant well but not sure it’s the best advice as it WILL be a huge deal for them as it’s a member of their family who they have lived with all their lives, and to minimise it won’t help. I would tell them it’s fine to feel sad and show emotions.

We chose to have our dog buried and said some nice things around the grave, like a little ceremony.. the children were older than yours though.

@Justkeepingplatesspinningthank you very much x

@ParsnipPuree thank you, we told him this morning, it was and is a huge deal to him and us. We took her to the crematorium last night and will pick her ashes up on Wednesday and scatter them in her favourite spot

@Eggsboxedandmeltingthank you. she was the kindest dog in the world, not a bad bone in her body she loved every human. Other dogs not so much

@FluffyMcFlufferson oh what a beautiful girl! I am so sorry for your loss💔

It's so hard when they've gone isn't it. I'm 3 weeks down the line but I am still being hit by her loss in waves that come out of nowhere. Today it was the empty tray from the lamb shoulder that I was dicing for a curry and she would usually clean out.
But to be able to do the kindest thing for our pets is a privilege. They give us so much and really don't ask for much in return.
I hope you are all doing as well as you can do after something like this 💐

@longtompoti’m so sorry for your loss, I had prepared myself for the ‘event’ and telling my son but I just hadn’t thought about doing life without her and the constant little daily reminders, currently crying my eyes out because my son didn’t finish his chicken for dinner and there isn’t a little shadow waiting by her bowl for me to put it in. The constant little moments of her not being there are hurting a lot. Have you any tips on how to make it easier? Thank you for your kind words x

@FluffyMcFlufferson I wish I did. I told my dd (27) that she just needed to cry if she felt like it as she was holding it in a lot. I just let myself cry a lot, and if it comes now I just let it happen.

I wasn't prepared for life after either.

But it is those little things that you catch yourself thinking oh doggo would love that...the amount of times in the first week I was about to say you coming to help me? as I went to the kitchen, or hang out the washing. It feels wrong not to shut the inside living room door when answering the door, there is no barking making sure I am not being hurt by the supermarket delivery driver. I miss walking her as this weather has been perfect, I miss her dreaming, just sleeping next to my side of the bed. I even miss her nighttime wandering around our bedroom, pushing through the curtains as she went past the foot of our bed. Her epic drinks from her bowl.

We got her ashes back a couple of days ago and I was not prepared for how that would make me feel. I am so glad we went for an individual cremation as I feel I have her home but it feels just so very final.

Someone said to me on the cocker spaniel group I am part of on Facebook that it's the fact we love them so much is why it hurts so much. It really does hurt my heart which I've never experienced before. I've lost cats and family members, but not close close ones, which I've been upset about, but I think because she was mine and my shadow I feel I have lost a part of myself.

I hear it gets easier, but with time. I would say just take it easy on yourself. If your ds wants to talk about Maisie then let him, and if you get upset he will see it's a natural thing to do 💐

@longtompotyes that all sounds very familiar sadly, in a way it shows how truly loved they were and so integrated into family life and whilst they are still here it’s perfect but it hurts so much more when they are no longer there to protect us from the bad supermarket delivery driver, or warn us of the black cat innocently walking on next door’s driveway.

Coming home has been one of the worst things so far, despite her being pretty senile she always waited for us at the bay window and then would be by the front door wagging her tail as we came in. Not seeing her in the window when I pull up is so so hard.

We said similar earlier, if we didn’t love her as much as we did we wouldn’t be crying at food bowls or empty sofas. I lost my grandad in October and this feels so much worse, I loved my grandad dearly but this is a whole new level of grief.
I would do anything for just one last lick
on the back of my hand and one last snuggle on the sofa.
Maisey is also being individually cremated, should get her ashes back late next week. I have ordered a frame for her collar that has space for a picture of her and a pillow with her picture on for my son.

Thank you for your kind words and advise i really appreciate it. I hope things get easier for you very soon. Gone but never forgotten xx