Puppy Survival Thread for New and Old Pups - here comes winter 2024

[Bupster]

I thought I might as well be the one to start the new thread! Nothing to report but a sleepy puppy over here.

A boy, and yes, will definitely share pics. I've lurked for so long on these threads admiring all the beautiful pioches, it's time to repay 😊

Aw I totally get that.

My boy puppy is only 5 months but I’ll be proud when he wees like a grown up dog too.

@Bupster ha I would feel the same! Well done Bill!

@locketrocket every cockapoo I have ever met has been a joy. They are lovely dogs!

We have been to our first puppy class today. The lady who runs it is a gun dog trainer and she was so lovely. We did responding to name and starting to learn heel, both of which we've done lots of already, but she did give some good advice on teaching a release word which is something we need to do. I'm away next weekend so going to miss a week but looking forward to the next one!

Does anyone have any collar recommendations? The one he has currently isn't very wide and I think he needs something a bit more substantial but there's too much choice!

@YorkshireFelix Hooray for your first session – sounds fab! I use 'ok' as a release, but if I got a second dog I'd definitely teach the pair of them to release by name, as they would be if out working.

I love a leather collar! They soften up and look gorgeous very quickly if you look after them. We have a Le Chameau half leather/half waxed cotton one as we also have their leads and it's very smart, and a polo belt one too from Pioneros, but I appreciate that not everyone can be bothered with leather. We've also got a more practical Ruffwear one too for when it is continuously wet or when we are going specifically to do water retrieves which is also excellent.

We swear by the Ezydog Double D ring collars - they're really soft but very strong and come in loads of colours and sizes. They also give you good peace of mind if you lead walk in areas where there's heavy traffic.

Muddy undercarriage season begins around now- A wash and dry after every walk.

Last winter was the worst for mud locally that I can remember.

Liquid mud as heavy clay soil.
Cracked pad from constant mud
Had to use paw balm to ease it.

Bridle leather collars- My saddler made two in 1993 and the smaller is still in use.

Quality English leather, looked after, lasts.

Thanks everyone for the recommendations! I do like the idea of a leather one.

@PyreneanAubrie funnily enough I was just looking at these so good to know you recommend 😃

@oakleaffy 1993!!! That is probably the best value for money ever. I was born in 1990 🤣

My 1yo male lab only started raising his leg 'to go' after his 1st birthday. A few weeks later, he still only uses his new 'skill' in areas frequented by lots of dogs. He started scent marking his territory outdoors at same time though (e.g. he now always goes twice on his early morning outing in different spots wheras before it was only ever once).
First time I saw him 'go' differently I felt a certain pride/nostalia/something that doesn't translate so well into words. But it went something like: 'My pup's a doggo now! Look at him! I raised him! Where's my puppy tho!? Anyone?? My pup's a doggo!' 🙃

I hear you @Bupster It's a definate rite of passage for little cute pup and doggo Bill!

Just looking for some advice/support. We have a beautiful golden lab puppy, who as puppy's go is pretty good. I should be over the moon as we had planned and prepped for nearly two years. I had dogs growing up and was heavily involved so knew how challenging pups can be.
I was okay initially, overwhelmed like before but the last week I've really lost the plot. I thought it was the puppy blues but I've been having panic attacks, nausea, anxiety attacks, and I've not eaten for 5 days as I have no appetite, just picking here and there . I feel so awful that I'm upsetting the family with how I'm feeling and that puppy is picking up on it. I'm trying to bond with pup but I'm also going through the menopause so I think everything is greatly heightened. My husband has been fantastic and can clearly see I'm struggling. I've got the drs tomorrow to see if there's anything they can help with. I had a meltdown today out the blue, couldn't breathe, stressing about the responsibility of having her and couldn't settle, I was pacing the floor, my poor husband was pacing the floor next to me. Sorry for the long post but I'm feeling a bit lost and completely surprised by how I'm feeling.

@Sparkler77 menopause can drive you completely round the bend in all kinds of unexpected ways. My perimenopause was a slow slope then falling off a cliff - I was sleeping about five hours a night on a dog-cooling mat (I didn't have a dog), I was so stupid I couldn't understand emails I had written the previous week, and I was verging on suicidal. My new doctor (I'd recently moved) was wonderful and gave me HRT and three days after starting the fog started to lift. Anything awful you're feeling might be stemming directly from menopause or exacerbated by it - especially if it's affecting your sleep. Are you on HRT?

Having said all of that, the early puppy days are utterly demented anyway. Puppy blues is a real thing. I'm on my own with mine, who I absolutely adore, but the responsibility can be completely overwhelming even now and I regularly come here to post about how I'm struggling with anxiety and yet am not an anxious person (hmmm). You are welcome here and you've definitely found your people x

@Sparkler77 you're not alone in how you feel. No matter how well prepared we are for our pups the responsibility
and how much they need is overwhelming. You're also likely in peak anxiety phase of wanting to do everything right to raise a well balanced pup, feeling immense pressure to do it now (24-7) but being utterly overwhelmed by the relentless enormity of it all and (despite your prepardeness) not even knowing what to do alot of time. Books tend not to feature reality of puppies! The blood, sweat and tears. And unless you've done it 24-7 yourself before its impossible to convey the relentless exhaustion of it all. We can feel so alone with our puppies. I felt a lot like you do with mine but, for better or worse, didn't have someone with me witnessing my every meltdown. I truly believe your experiences and reactions are normal reactions to new puppy parent. Love isn't instant either. It takes time to grow (or else it wouldnt mean everything like it does). So you're likely doing all this while still falling in love with pup (as a process) rather than being all the way there yet. I know I don't know you but from your post and my experience I'd say there's nothing at all wrong with you. Puppies are soooo hard work. It's the hardest work I've ever done and sooo incredibly stressful trying to get it all right too. Not sure if that helps at all but just wanted to let you know you're not alone in how you feel. When I'd had LemonDog as long as you'd had your pup I just wanted a time machine to enable me to undo it all. I was miserable that I couldn't. Everyone knew I had him and how much I'd wanted him. I couldn't admit how I felt. I don't feel that way at all anymore. (It gets easier) You likely wanted a dog you raised from puppy, not a puppy per say (if so, same here). They're like a different species!

I also agree with everything @Bupster has said too, who's said what I would have wanted to say to you, if I'd have been able to find the right words!

Hi @Sparkler77

I'm not great with words but I am sorry you are having such a rough time. I can sympathise with regard to anxiety, panic attacks and loss of appetite, and for me it all worsened greatly during the menopause. It's good that your husband is supportive and I hope your GP can offer some help tomorrow.

As lovely Bupster and LemonPalmz have already said, we all know how overwhelming and exhausting having a new puppy is. It doesn't matter how much previous experience of dogs you have, Puppy Blues can still affect you. I didn't expect it, but it hit me really hard! It is very normal to feel panicky and scared about being responsible for a tiny puppy, it's really daunting at first. It does get easier as your pup gains a bit of independence and you get into a routine, but even so, all of us here have bad days when we need support from each other. Puppies are hard work!

Thank you for your kind words. I feel like a completely different person at the moment. Nothing feels normal or right and I'm kind of lost if I'm honest. I feel awful as I've had thoughts of wishing we had not got the pup or of handing her back to the breeder 😥

@Sparkler77 Just echoing the other lovely ladies here but wanted to add my support as I was where you are a year ago. I had a full blown breakdown in Boots one day and cried on the (baffled) pharmacist, tried to give my (genuinely very easy) pup away at every point for about two months, and didn't eat properly for weeks. And then the fog cleared and I came to an accord with both myself and her. I was 90pc on my own with her and my partner (who works away) just couldn't understand what the issue was – surely it should have been fine, what with the cute puppy and all. But I was beside myself, crying all the time, and it was horrendous.

Now she's my shadow and I wouldn't be without her. You will get through it and we're all here to help if we can x

Honestly, @Sparkler77 , so much of this is normal. I expect many people daren't admit that they've even had thoughts of what their lives would be like if the puppy had never turned up, or just being desperate for it to disappear for one night as if it had never existed. I personally haven't had a hot bath for nearly four months and oh dear God I crave one. For me the biggest thing has been how he crowds out everything else - there is just no space left. For months I was barely doing the bare minimum at work and now I'm having to crowd most of my working from home into the handful of hours he's asleep. It feels overwhelming because it is.

Everyone will tell you it'll settle into a different kind of normal but that normal is still developing for me. And my pupper is six months old. So it won't be overnight but it will (I hope) come.

But don't underestimate the effects of perimenopause. If it happened to blokes, they'd stick HRT in beer. It really does banjax vast swathes of your life in ways you don't recognise until the fog lifts.

To be truthful, nothing prepares you for how crappy the menopause is and with puppy tiredness on top of that you do lose yourself for a while. It sounds as if you are in the early days with your pup, so maybe once you form a bit more of a bond with her it will help.

I went through the "we shouldn't have got her" with my puppy too. You start to think life was so much simpler before and, as brushingboots has just said, you feel like rehoming the pup because you feel so completely overwhelmed. But my girl is 6 months old now and I cannot imagine life without her.

I so appreciate all of your messages, it's really is good to know that I'm not alone. It's been a really crappy weekend and even putting one foot in front of the other is an effort. My friends who have dogs all had instant love and connections which makes me feel even worse but it's different for everyone. My husband had said we'll take it day by day and what will be will be. Why is it always women and never men that have Tue breakdowns 🫠

@Sparkler77 Comparison is the thief of joy, as they say. I strongly believe that I wouldn't have got to where I am with my (grown up) pup if it hadn't been so appalling to start with, as now I really appreciate how good she is.

Your husband is right @Sparkler77 about taking it one day at a time.

My 5 month old puppy seems to have regressed recently into being very needy again and I find it draining mentally. I am feeling shattered at the end of this weekend.

You’re not alone, most of us have these dark moments but we wake up and do it all again the next morning & some days are easier than others.

I do remember my previous dog was easy as an adult, just chilled & placid. It’s the puppy stage I forgot!

Teething has arrived in full force. One tooth fell out on Wednesday but the two top ones are bleeding a bit, especially after a tug game. Ruairi is chewing EVERYTHING even his own paw 😭 I do have yaks but never tried microwaving them. Ruairi not a fan but I'll give them a go today 🤞🏼

@Ruairismum we are in the same boat but no sign of losing teeth yet! He seems to love chewing all my wood furniture, doors, skirting boards. I bought a big olive wood chew which he seems to like in spurts but it's not really saving my furniture at all as he likes to chew both 🤣

Thanks everyone who gave advice a couple of days about when I asked for help with our Golden Retriever puppy hating their crate. She's now happily settling in her pen and last night even slept through!

The dilemma I have now is stairs-related. We live in a house with a weird staircase that can't fit a baby gate even with an extension. Pup has already gone up and down the stairs more than once! Can anyone think of an inventive way to block the stairs where we and DC can still access them? My DH seems to think we should just accept pup climbing up and down them (they are shallow and wide and carpeted) but I know the advice is not to until they're much older because it can harm their joints.