I've failed as a dog owner...

[Anxiousdogowner6]

I have an almost 8 month old puppy. I got a dog because I spend a LOT of time by myself (no family or friends) and wanted a companion for in the house and walks. I don't work and have depression and anxiety and thought I had everything to give a dog.

I bought a pup recommended for first time owners, a known lapdog and calm breed.

However, he's been anything but. He's extremely energetic and has been full on from day one! He still bites and jumps up and destructs things in the house. I am still watching his every move in the house and I have become so anxious. I feel panicky all the time. I can't relax. I feel trapped. I can't do anything in the house any more - he chews books/paper and barks at the hoover etc. I feel so restricted.

Is this dog life? Will it ever get better? Should I re-home him? I worry that I'm just not suited to having a dog, he's causing me so much anxiety!!!

He needs puppy classes too. And walks with lots of sniffage, to keep his brain busy.

You haven't failed, and neither has your puppy. It's just a (tough) phase. If I were you, I'd work on recall, because off lead is a game changer when you can trust them to come back. Little and very often, with high rewards (Primula cheese is useful, just the tiniest taste squirted out as they lick the end of the tube), naps in between, puppy classes if you possibly can. Socialising isn't just meeting another puppy, but you probably know that. It's rain and wind, fallen leaves, cars passing, a sports field with kids playing, just taking in the world. It tires them out for naps when they process it all. When you are tired, read aloud to him a bit. Anything you're reading. Let him start listening to your voice. Good luck.

You shouldn’t have a dog , what an awful attitude .

He sounds bored. Try doing more walks. We were pulling our hair out with our Cockapoo. Lots of outside time was the only thing that calmed him down. Then he turned 2 and suddenly became a lot calmer

I don’t think he sounds bored. He just sounds like a challenging puppy who is probably not getting enough fast-burst energy ie running off lead. Yes joints have to be protected but running around for 20 minutes a few times a day on not-pavements will do him no end of good. Especially if he gets controlled play with other dogs. I have a different breed but was very similar as a pup of that age - really trying!

Have you tried a long training lead? My girl has had some issues meaning I sometimes use it and also let it go on flow of feeling confident in area. I really think they need a run around so keep working on it

If he's nine months old and never gets the chance to run free then I'm not surprised he's behaving the way he is.

If he has poor recall then you need to hire an enclosed field with a long line attached to a harness so he can't get himself into any trouble and can't evade "capture" at the end.

Ideally dogs should be off the lead from the minute you bring them home as they'll stick to you to like glue so you can constantly reinforce their recall.

You can also use a house line on him indoors to redirect his behaviour and stop him from digging up the floors and in the sofas, but ultimately he needs proper aerobic exercise everyday, not to be plodding about on the end of a lead.

Young dogs are massive dickheads and 8 months can be a real low point with them trying their luck and getting on your nerves. It will 100% get better (but it might get worse before it does!)

As previous posters have mentioned some puppy training classes might be a good idea, for both you and the pup.

Also, make sure he’s getting a good off lead walk to tire him out. I’m a firm believer that a tired dog is a happy dog.

I’m currently raising a puppy for Guide Dogs for the Blind and all their puppies are fed Royal Canin and they turn out very well behaved.

It’s not the food it’s more his age - puppy blues are a real thing! He does possibly need more exercise & interaction with other dogs & people at the park or in a dog class.

The puppy will calm down, it's just the way of things. Don't make any quick decisions.

I know you provide two 30 minute walks a day, but I think you need to change this if possible. Can you get out for an hour in the morning? Could you go to a field with a long line lead (not the extendable ones) and train them to fetch a ball? This was a lifesaver for my spaniel. I can spend an hour launching a ball back and forth and she's done in until mid afternoon. Then followed up with a 30 minute walk in the afternoon.

You've already said about enrichment stuff but if you haven't already, have you tried snuffle mats and the Kong treat wobbly toys?

For a period of time, I just had to keep my dog in every room I was in. She would try to rip up the kitchen floor, carpets etc if left to her own devices and not fully exercised. She's 2 and a half now and totally different!

Dogs can be variable. I had a lovely placid dog who was very cuddly and nice. His replacement is a little shit who won’t obey commands and doesn’t want to be cuddled and pisses when he gets excited. Both the same breed from the same breeder.

I wonder if you’re sticking to the largely debunked exercise guidelines of 5 mins per month - you can definitely exercise an 8 month old for much longer. Not zooming for hours but walks

I would take him out for a leisurely, sniffy hour in the mornings, and change up the locations so he sees new things and sniffs different dogs and gets to use his brain lots. Try out public footpath routes you don’t already know and just amble with him. So heel practice for a bit then just let him go at his own pace. The stimulation of different routes and new things is tiring in a really good way and it will all help your bond.

I've not read all the replies, but some things that might help:

• good quality food (I've recently moved to Millie's Wolfheart for my dogs and am very happy with it)
• reduce or remove the opportunities for it to destroy things - a puppy pen or baby gates to keep the puppy in a safe place other than when you are interacting with it
• create safe outlets for the digging and chewing. Frozen kongs are always recommended but for good reason. The Millie's Wolfheart food suppliers also supply great dried meat chews. Give the pup one of these when you put them into the puppy pen to associate it with nice things
• focus training on 'life skills' and especially settle
• spend time when you are interacting soothing and calming rather than hyping up (e.g. flirt pole). I saw a dog trainer with my very hyper dog and he recommended creating a cue with the word "steady" - introducing it first by saying it gently while the dog is calm and while you are stroking and soothing it. Once you have associated the word with calm behaviour it can be a cue to help quieting down hyper times.

It does take time, but it's worth putting the effort in. Hyper dogs are often intelligent dogs who are expressing that they are under-stimulated, so a combination of situation management, training and more targeted stimulation (safe outlets for digging and chewing rather than the same boring lead walk every day) should start to pay dividends quite quickly.

In terms of food - what suits one dog will be awful for another and vice versa.

Royal Canin is fairly high in carbs and not necessarily a great option for a lap dog who spends 23 hours a day in a house, whereas it would potentially be fine for a working dog who is constantly on the go.

I have a 18 month old Shih Tzu and I love him but he is an arsehole, I use a longline with him as his recall is shite, but he is calmer now than he was at 9 - 12 months which were hard, he still bites my husband feet but not mine as I was quite firm in not allowing that, but everyone keeps telling that at 2 years old the calm down, not sure I believe it but it's the only thing giving me hope 🤣

What a lovely reply 🙄

Google some scent games - very tiring for them.

Don't just train to do things like sit, give a treat to reward when they are doing something good - so treat when it's not jumping up, or when it's nicely settled, or sitting.

I think they are horrors so we aren't tempted to get another 🙂

I have a now 4 year old Shihtzu cross and remember crying at least twice when she was a puppy and I thought I couldn't cope. I now couldn't imagine life without her!
I also live alone and can understand. It's full on when it's just you there to entertain them and noone else to give you a break. But on the plus side, when they do calm down, they become your little side kick and it's amazing!
Things that helped me in the puppy stage:

1. Get an occasional dog walker. Helps socialise and tire the dog and also give you a break sometimes.
2. Get a pen and put a crate in it. Safe place for the pup when they need to calm down. Try covering the crate to make a den for sleeping.
3. Lick mats, dog puzzles, chews are all great for calming.
4. Do some fun training. My dog loved agility so we found a local field to hire with agility equipment and did a few classes. Could also get some equipment for the garden.
5. Train, train, train. It'll tire them out because they will be thinking about what you want. And even if you think they aren't getting it, more will be going in than you realise.
6. Use a long line if recall is bad so they can have a run and you can practice recall.