Massive regrets about adopting our dog...

[Mindfulraisin]

I know a lot of you will judge me for this, but I am hoping at least some will have some advice... Sorry it's a long story.
We adopted a rescue dog from abroad - a local family was giving her up, they said it was because they had sudden sickness in the family and couldn't give her the attention, the rescue organisation that brought her to the UK said it was they were unwilling to put in the time to train her. They said she just had normal "puppy" issues and just needs training.
Her story is - she was found at about 3 months old on her own, brought to the UK to a foster and adopted by that family. Stayed with them for a month then we took her about 10 days ago. We visited her and loved her - she is a beautiful pup, friendly and sweet, and unfortunately any concerns I had when I met her I ignored - I just wanted another dog after I lost my old one few months ago.
Unfortunately as soon as we brought her home we realised we cannot manage her. She has masses of energy, she is not aggressive but extremely nippy. You can't put a lead on her, or a harness, or lift her paws to wipe etc. She is also getting quite big, I swear she grew since we took her in! We have a 5 year old, and it's just not a suitable dog for us - my daughter got bitten on the bum once - it was in play and not out of aggression, and it didn't pierce her skin just left two indentations.
The rescue place has advertised her for rehoming, but are calling us irresponsible, and telling us to "just grow up", that she's just a puppy that needs work. They have not seen this dog in 6 weeks, so not sure how can they know the issues. They still say on the ad that she is small in size! Whilst we appreciate we made a stupid decision, we feel she really needs to go, for everyone's sanity. I feel like the rescue place should be held responsible here too, as she should not have been rehomed with us - the young child and we also both work, albeit my other half from home. Which is another issue, as she howls when left alone and until we started using a crate she was thrashing the place. We can't bond with a dog that is either nipping us or howling...
She would suit somebody who is at home most of the time to play and train her. There is a local man who wanted to adopt her from us, but the rescue place turned him down and said they didn't feel he was the right match. He is about 70, retired and lives alone. They offered him a different dog, very similar to ours just a little older so not sure what the issue is. How can they say he was not right but decided that we are?
Trouble is the contract I signed says if we don't want or can't keep the dog we have to offer it back to the organisation to be rehomed, or to the kennels where they would wait to be rehomed (we would have to pay for that). I would hate to do that as I think kennels would be an awful place for her, but not sure what else we can do?! My partner wants to contact the Blue Cross...

OP, please do not get another dog. You knew this was a puppy, you must have known puppies are hard work, you are out at work all day and your DH hasn't got the time or inclination to engage to that extent. Sorry but this makes me angry.

By the way, this sounds just like normal puppy behaviour to me.

You're putting a lot of the blame on a rescue but as you've said yourself you aren't novices you've had a puppy before - so you are equally if not more to blame. Seems clear you can't be bothered to put the work in that a puppy needs. You shouldn't get another dog.

Sigh. Another overseas dog over here, when we already have SO MANY here of our own. (I know it wasn't OP that brought her here; my point still stands)

I agree with you, although every stray dog given a home is a bonus.

More's to the point we have yet another owner who inexplicably had no idea of the amount of time, energy and love required to look after a dog. Crikey, who knew! Maybe someone should make this common knowledge or something.

Puppy blues OP. Stick with it. 12.5 years ago we brought home a 12 week old pup who I wanted to rehome after a week. Even went so far as someone coming and offering to take her but my mum stopped me and said "just give it time, and training".

We've just said good bye to our fur baby and I can't imagine how our lives would have been without her.

(We also have a 14 month old pup who I want to throw in the bin some days so I get it, but they are always worth it)

A british rescue would have hammered home the time and energy required to look after a dog and very probably have turned down the OP.

Then the rescue bashing threads would appear "why dont they rehome to us, why are there no dogs suitable for us with children"

Foreign rescue did not hammer home any facts.........but let an unsuitable homing take place

You can't blame the rescue for not predicting that you were unaware a 4 month old puppy nips.

As for her not wanting to be alone, also in the realms of normal. Rescue centers get a real kicking on here for insisting someone is at home, but here's a great example of why. You're basically returning her because of her not coping with being alone. That's what all the rescue centers are trying to avoid. Being passed back and forth is damaging for the poor dog.

So much this. U.K. based centres are so fussy to avoid this exact situation.

I agree with you. British rescue centres are thankfully exemplary. I apologise for my cynicism about the owner but I've just been reading another similar thread although I don't think this was a "foreign" dog. The owner now has 2 children and was imho looking for validation to have the poor dog put to sleep. After 5 years she's decided she can't cope. It just makes me angry.

Tbh nothing you have described sounds like an issue for someone actually willing to put in the hours and work to train a puppy.

What breed is she??

I do agree with PPs you shouldn’t get another dog again. If you can’t cope with a normal puppy then you have no business owning a dog. And you should never (IMO) get a dog if you can’t be home with it 90% of the time.

All puppies are twats. The only reason we stick with it is because we know what sweethearts they turn into. You’ve had her ten days. Get a grip.

Sounds like normal puppy to me. It is hard work at the beginning but you persevere for the dog. We adopted a four month old springer cross who had had three homes. She needed stability and patience and three years later we still have her and she’s very much part of the family.

If I’m completely honest you don’t sound particularly cut out for dog ownership.

Just an FYI, from a legal side, the clause in their contract about giving the dog back to them wouldn’t actually stand up in court. The dog is what’s classed as a possession in law and once you give that possession away, by selling it or gifting it (which is what rehoming is), you can’t then ask for it back. Most rescues don’t realise this so put it in a contract, but it actually wouldn’t stand up in court. If you gave the dog to the 70yr-old man or another rescue, they may threaten all sorts but it’s not legally binding.

For simplicity, change ‘dog’ to ‘vase’. You can’t sell or give away a vase with the condition it gets returned to you if the buyers don’t want it anymore. You sold it. It isn’t your property anymore.

I have to agree, I don't entirely understand why there are so many rescues bringing foreign dogs here when we already have so many needing homes.

The rescue is at fault. There is a reason most rescues don't rehome to homes with young children.

There are many reasons - all in the best interests of the dog but this is a great example of one good reason why not.

Where you home checked? Did you really understand what you were getting. Aka a puppy. That grows and is a handful and puppy bites. And probably has serration anxiety caused by.... loads of reasons. It had a tough start ti life and it's life just got tougher because your lack of research and heart over head means it's going to be rehomed again.

Where the rescue are correct is that they offer full rescue back up - that is if it doesn't work out they rehome the dog - and thank goodness because what would you do otherwise???

You have entirely the wrong set up for a dog. Young child, someone reliable not at home, the wrong expectations of the huge work involved in a puppy and just annoy working, give it back rather tha.Lan fox it attitude.

Please don't get another dog.

You bought a puppy and now you’re surprised it is acting like a puppy in need of training?

JFC, poor dog. It’s gonna be on its third home because no-one will put the work in.

I don't know why everyone keeps talking about normal puppy behaviour

This is not a normal puppy. It's a feral street dog who was shipped overseas during its' vital socialisation period only to end up passed around two unsuitable homes before the age of five months.

The poor thing is probably completely traumatised and doesn't even know whether she's coming or going.

OP, I understand your reservations with the rescue but no reputable organisation will take her while you still have a contract elsewhere. If you can't cope (which is totally understandable, they lied to you!) then hand her back. Don't try and put yourself in the position of being this dogs' saviour.

This poor dog. The rehoming charity sound horrific and should be reported. You were never a suitable home for a dog. All the humans at fault and dog suffering for it. Dont get another pet ever....stick to a cuddly toy

‘She would suit somebody who is at home most of the time to play and train her’

I’m with the give her back and don’t ever get another dog pp’s I’m afraid. You adopted a bloody puppy ffs. And now you’re surprised she needs training and playing with, and is showing teething behaviours and howls when you lock her in a cage on her own? What on earth were you expecting from a puppy?

People who wouldn’t be accepted for a dog by a reputable rehoming centre in the U.K. bypass the scrutiny by getting a dog from abroad then complain that the overseas organisation shouldn’t have given them a dog.
it’s hard to have much sympathy for the humans in this scenario.

I agree too.
Totally normal puppy.

Omg op! That rescues behaviour is utterly despicable! Not only did they give you a puppy that plays and needs training and does stuff like makes noise, they’ve actually given you a puppy that had the absolute audacity to GROW BIGGER after you got it!! Give it back to the rescue while it still has a chance you ducking twunt 🙄🙄

Sorry I completely agree with most of the posters on here. Puppies, dogs all animals are HARD WORK. You have to put in the work to reep the rewards.

You are talking about a poor dogs life at the end of the day, he can’t be passed from pillar to post all his life , this needs to be nipped in the bud before he gets too old. You have taken the massive responsibility of taking him on and that’s amazing but why can’t you stick with him and give him a proper chance before just giving the poor love away, dogs are not toys you can refund when it doesn’t go your way.

If he’s nipping , jumping and hyper like all young dogs are , what makes you think he will be suitable for the older gentleman who is willing to have him?

Sorry for the harshness but it’s my opinion.

Just in case the OP is still reading (not sure I would be in her shoes):

Can the dog be in the same room as your husband during the day? Even in the crate? Or with a nice pupy Kong full of peanut butter to occupy her? She's been through a lot in her short life and it's no surprise she wants comfort and company. Expecting her to magically stop howling in her crate won't get you far but in the same room as him with some well-chosen treats she might calm down?

The nipping is normal while any dog is teething, and is not concerning in and of itself - also just needs to be trained out her with patience and strategy.

Since your DH is the one WFH, he's the one who is going to have to be most hands on. Can he split his lunch hour and breaks to give her 10 mins of attention every 90 mins or so, and a decent runaround with ball throwing twice a day? Is he even willing to do this? If not then I have to agree with other posters that you should not have taken the dog.

You may well be 3-6 months away from a lovely family dog who will bring you all joy for many years. But for those months you will have to put the work into training and socialising, as with any puppy. In your shoes I'd definitely invest in some training (ideally from someone with experience of foreign rescues) and make sure DH is on board with keeping her occupied during the day.

Otherwise by all means give her to the elderly gent who is keen, I can't for a second believe they'd remove her from him if the situation was working (she can stay chipped to you for now, surely? Then just get the vet to change the registration details on the chip at some point?)

I'm shocked they let you have any dog with a five year old. Did they homecheck you?

The poor dog. This is all normal puppy stuff. Puppies ate hard work and you need to put in the time. NEVER get a dog again. You are not equipped on an emotional level.