Do you get annoyed if someone misgenders your dog?!

[DrMeredithGrey2023]

I was talking to a woman at a village family event the other day, and called her dog 'she'

Her facial expression instantly changed, and she quite curtly said 'um, he' and then the vibe changed.

Can't say it offends me in the slightest if someone calls my dog a girl, to the point that I'm even sure I'd bother to correct them in the situation we were in - chances are I'll never see her again 🤣

Does it bother you?

My teen DCs tell me it becoming common to refer to a dog as "they" so as not to misgender the dog. A bit strange when it is the dog's owner doing it who presumably knows the dog's sex.

Never mind, @DrMeredithGrey2023 we use ‘misgendered’ as a joke when it happens. As in “omg, did that man just misgender you, LITERAL VIOLENCE” when they’ve gone

I used to say “she’s a bitch” about our previous Lab, in answer to “is it a boy or a girl?” but I got over myself and copy the terminology used by the asker now.

I know a few people who prefer blue/pink leads, collars and harnesses etc. I prefer leather with a proper buckle and a double ended lead but hey, everyone’s different 🤷‍♀️

@Coffeethrowtrampbitch Bella cocks her leg as well!

Yep. Same. She's a black lab though so I think everyone assumes large ish black dog = boy. 😆

Interesting thread! I don't have a dog, but love them and have often wondered if people get offended if call their female dog "he". I always default to he, I think it's because my grandparents had a male dog when I was growing up - and he was my absolute world!! (RIP ❤️)
My DH always defaults to "she" when he sees a dog, I assume because he had a female dog growing up.

I wouldn't assume a pink leader meant female dog. I have pink leash and matching pink whistle but she also has blue, black and an avengers leash too.

I wouldn't assume the leash is linked to gender or sex of the owner either, dh prefers the pink one because its a rope texture and easy to get on and off, so that's basically his leash of choice when he walks her.

Other dog walkers usually ask what my dogs name is called and then use she, or they look at her back end and see she's a bitch but sometimes people say "he's well behaved isn't he?" Or "you're a good boy" and I don't correct them.

Dogs don't have a gender.

People have called my old boy a girl even when he was flat out on his back with his goods on display 😂I don't get upset by it, but know some do, so my go to phrases are 'Hello, aren't you a cutie/poppet/sweetie', I use the same tack when addressing unknown babies too.

My husband walk the dogs with our girl in pink collar and lead and pink equifleeces too.

I correct but it doesn't bother me. It does seem that black lab = boy to the majority of the population

LOL what a wet wipe!

No, happens all the time with mine. I've got a very pretty, doe eyed black greyhound who is a male but gets "she" all the time because he's so pretty, and an incredibly scruffy, beardy, burly Scottish Deerhound cross who is a female but gets "he" a lot. Funnily enough it's never bothered them!

Interestingly it never happens with our third dog, she must just look like a girl.

It annoys me when people call pets 'it' & I hear people doing this often (working in an animal environment). Pisses me right off.
Objectifies pets & animals & grates on me

People always used to mistake our dog for a boy. Not sure why, but I think it may have been because she was a staffy mix and very playful? I always think all bulldogs look like boys! And all those little fluffy type dogs seem girly. Of course it isn’t true, but I think it’s just a weird looks pretty means girl, looks strong means boy.

I doubt the dogs care either way, I doubt my dog was using her tail to wipe her tears away that she was seen as masculine looking.

Although my youngest DD was also mistaken for a boy quite often, so maybe that’s why we didn’t care 😂 she was basically bald until she was about three and has a very boyish energy. But even in a pink top with leggings and sparkly wellies it would be ooh he’s full of beans/isn’t he a good climber.

No,I think this is quite interesting.

Sex, and gender used to be used interchangeably by most people. Now with all the gender nonsense we need to remember to be very specific and use the word sex instead.

But getting back to the thread. Small children like to put things/people into categories, so mummies/daddies, cats/dogs. I would suggest that 99% of the people writing on mumsnet grew up at a time when sex was unambiguous, we weren’t taught to be inclusive all the time.

I also have an unconscious bias that dogs are male and cats female. I owned a big dog for many years and although a she, people would think she was male if they couldn’t see her undercarriage clearly.

I think we all have inbuilt associations about the sex of the dog depending on its looks/breed.

So to me a stocky bulldog would instinctively be male, and a miniature poodle would be female. This is the millisecond thought that flashes in my mind, before I correct myself and notice things like a pink lead.

I wonder if we wrote a list of all breeds and had to assign a sex to them on just the feeling they arouse, I personally think social conditioning would make our replies similar.

Its along the same lines as what is your automatic reaction to the sex of say a nurse, surgeon, engineer?

Border Collie anyone?

No. My dog has a gender neutral name so people often get it wrong.

As a trainer though I tend to say ‘good dog’ as it’s easier 😂

Definitely hate 'it'! I do have to grit my teeth a little when people call my girl cat he, but only if they've met before and have been introduced, because that just feels rude 😆

It used to happen all the time (he's no longer with us ). He was a 'toy' breed and castrated, which I think was why people assumed he was female - but those with knowledge of the breed always got his sex right, because males are larger than females and he was on the large side even for a male.

No, it didn't bother me in the slightest. If the conversation was long enough to warrant it, I simply corrected the person in a friendly way.

I once had a vet mis-sex my dog. When I pointed out that the dog was, in fact, male, she said "oh, but he looks so pretty". It didn't really inspire confidence.

Wow people really need to get a life if this offneds them!

Misgenders your dog - I've heard it all now! 😂

Not at all. All our dogs have been transdogs.

My dog gets called 'he' all the time as she has a turquoise collar and blue harness. I like blue. Doesn't bother me, but I do say "good girl" a lot so sometimes I think it's just people not listening. Dh got shouted at in the park by some madwoman for the dog, Sausage, having a boy's name and not wearing pink. (Dog was named by my DD)

Imagine thinking you are superior because someone said gender rather than sex, and then went on to acknowledge the choice of word.

My DDog has a sex-neutral name, but she's often called 'he' by onlookers because she's such an utter shit and dislikes all other animals and most people. For some reason, those behaviours are seen as indicative of her being male, rather than it being typical of her breed. And yes, I do get a wee bit sniffy when she's called 'he', but then I also get sniffy when people call her a Jack Russell (she's a Patterdale).

My dogs don't have a gender. They have a sex.
I think owners presume all dogs are the same sex as their own, but people calling my male dogs 'she' doesn't bother me in the slightest as I know I do the reverse.