What my stupid dog ate next

[Roodog]

I was just congratulating myself on managing not to have to visit the vet because of something our scavenger / opportunist thief greyhound has eaten, for a whole year, when my husband shouted up the stairs to me that the hound had torn into a box of bonemeal fertiliser and obviously eaten some, though not masses.

That was yesterday afternoon. After a sleepless night mopping up sick and repeatedly checking the data sheet that states bonemeal is not toxic to dogs, I took him to the vet this morning. He's still there, and will remain on IV fluids overnight. Apparently he's now really comfy and chilled, and everyone loves him.

Honestly, he is a nightmare and not only does he not learn not to eat anything not in his food bowl, apparently we humans have not learned to expect him to eat ANYTHING even things totally unexpected.

And he's only been away for the day but I'm missing him!

What unexpected things have your dogs eaten, just to keep you on your toes? I know labradors are renowned scavengers, but I reckon greyhounds can give them a run for their money!

Ah hugs op, hope your doggie is home soon.

I’ve a friend who bought loads of croissants for family coming for brunch. The dog ate all of them.
Must have been about 14?!

My sons 1st birthday chocolate cake
Sunflower seeds (shells still on) poo was interesting
My sisters Christmas cake - poo was gross
Full of poo nappies from the bin
Human poo- mouth was gross
Rancid dead deer
Manure
Cat food
Expensive ham
Tubs of butter
Bag of dried fruit
Sheep's wool slug deterrent - vomit was copious and ghastly and stank

Luckily husband is a vet 😅

Half a bag of chilli heatwave Doritos
bag choc coins
unpeeled himself a banana
my then boyfriend’s vomit (sun lunch!)

One of those giant dairy milk that comes in a cardboard box 🤦‍♀️ Had to get emergency vet appointment so cost it's a fortune

My border terrier broke into a briefly unmanned bin bag, and ate:

The remains of a leg of lamb
A large (elderly) cooked chicken breast
9 chipolatas
Some buttered toast and a fried egg
(the reason for the abandoned breakfast going in the bin is another story)

He is supposedly violently intolerant of all meat and poultry proteins (I did actually call the vet to prepare a bed and a drip for him!) but whilst he resembled an inflated rugby ball for a few hours and did a GIANT chalky poo in the morning, he was remarkably unscathed.

I do know a dog who often broke into cupboards and ate whole loaves of bread, a bag of flour etc, but one of his worst was eating a kilo tub of margarine. Twice.

The one that nearly killed him though, was when he managed to get a hold of an empty dog food tin. He actually ripped chunks from the tin and swallowed them. He survived, but it was a very painful and expensive week in hospital.

I've read this whole thread thinking 'who was worse, DCs or young DDog' I think it may be a tie.
Luckily the breeders had warned us that despite being lovely mature dogs her parents had turned a leather sofa into arm chairs and raided the entire dog food bin (large vet bill).
I'm not going to mention the things the DC ate, someone would call SS, DDog used to specialise in shoe insoles.

My new blackcurrant bush and ran around the garden with it looking very proud.

Dalmatians in this house so anything goes 😩
Full strip of Costco cookies
Pack of hot cross buns
A candle
A pie off my plate
Toast out of the toaster
Nerf bullets
Lego
Pancake mixture
13 eggs
Any hot drink you leave lying around
Box of treats he ate the box
That's all I can think of at the mo 🤣🤣

Some friends of mine got a staffie
They'd had her a week,when they noticed her straining and trying to poo something bright orange
He managed to get to her and pulled
It was a sainsburys carrier bag

My parents used to have a heinz 57
Dad would make 3 sandwiches,cut them in half (so 6 half sandwiches) and then hed nip to the loo
There would be 5 half sandwiches on his return
This went on for weeks-with him having a go at my mother for playing a prank on him and she would always protest that she hadn't
Anyway,one afternoon he'd made them and wandered off just as my mother walked in
Just in time to see the dog snatch one and scoff it
She had the worst taste in sandwich fillings-it was seafood sauce

My sons dog ate half the sofa,a throw and 3 cushions

And another friends dog-half staffie,half whippet scoffed a very expensive easter egg (fortum & mason) that granny had bought for their dd-box and all
That Christmas he ate her selection box and advent calendar-they'd left him for about 10 minutes while they nipped to the shop (they put all these goodies where they thought he couldnt reach)
I don't think his human sister has ever forgiven him-she still brings it up when she's mad at him!

Ohh I forgot the most recent a tub of sudocrem!

It was hot cross buns that caused last year's vet trip

Just remembered when we were kids, the dog went to nick some cheese from the worktop. Mum shouted no, so dog swallowed the block whole, must have been 300g. He didn't choke. But did spend the whole night lying on the floor looking very sorry for himself.

Lots of poo, occasional balloons, chocolate but the real worries were mince pies (that cost us!) & plums (thankfully the stones that contain cyanide passed through her intact).

Previous DLabrador. Yep all kinds of shit. Cat and human her favourite 🤢 she found a used condom in a field once. I pulled it out of her mouth. Without gloves. 🤢🤢

Lurcher here with in built springs and can jump and climb .

Cost me a fortune in vet bills.

My DSis had a border terrier that got into a 10kg bag of kibble once. Literally ate until he couldn't swallow any more. Looked like he'd swallowed a football. He must have eaten his own body weight.

There was a news story a few years ago about a border collie that ate the fibreglass wheel arch off the owner's Aston Martin

Rotten dead duck . Rank when it went down . Even more rank when it came back up again an hour later.
An Asda carrier bag ( came out the other end after an evening of lots of gurgling and a very sad dog. )

The cockerpoo has had:
Few loaves of granary
Steak that was wrangled out of his mouth and cooked!
Ugg slippers
Dog bed
Uncooked pizza
Coal
Uncooked bread dough-trip to vet for that one

Lurcher here:

Broke into the box of kibble and ate himself silly. Vomited all night when dh who is normally in charge of vomit was away.

5 mince pies. We didn't even realise for days as we thought the other person had packed them away. Nope.

Shoes

Crisp packets left unattended

All kinds of poo

I hooked a battery out of his mouth this morning

Leftover satay pork

Every dog toy ever produced.

And Dm's lurcher ate an entire beef fillet that was defrosting for Christmas dinner.

All the Christmas chocolate for the teachers and PAs and decorations for the tree and chocolates for the stockings. She climbed up on furniture to get it from where it was stored higher than we thought she could ever reach.

The only thing left was the little bells from the chocolate reindeer.

This was between the afternoon and evening nativity plays.

She was violently sick for some hours and absolutely fine after. The replacement carpets were pricy. When I rang him the vet told me she would be ok and that she’d probably do the same thing all over again the very next week if she had the chance.

1 candle - unharmed though poo was vile next day
1 box of children's vitamins - trip to vets re. Vit D toxicity
30 choc raisins - he found them at a park - fast track to vets
1 pack of butter - gross poo
1/2 sertraline tablet - vet said not to worry might just be a bit chilled for a day.

Thank god for pet insurance!! Mad vizsla!!

Old collie carefully nibbled away the leg of a Chesterfield sofa - discovered when somebody sat on it and it collapsed.

Terrier ate a chocolate Santa, dead deer, dead seagull, dead crabs, seaweed, cow, horse and cat poo... never a bother on him.

Previous dog (staffie x whippet):

A bag of raw oatmeal
Macarons
Chocolate off the top of the high bookshelf (launched himself off the back of the sofa to get it)
The net off a roast of beef (vomited everywhere until it came back up)
A selection of those little Green and Blacks chocolates out of a Christmas present
A whole duck carcass
Used nappies
Carrots directly out of the veg patch - pulled them up himself

Current dog (border collie):

A blue cleaning cloth
Raw potatoes
A raw lamb chop off the worktop
Lots of socks
Used sanitary towels
Obligatory vet trip for raisins - cinnamon and raisin bagel
Cotton buds

Dlurcher1 once ate a giant tray of flapjack that was cooling in the kitchen. He was sick for days, but apart from his one other occasion of letting himself down (post christmas lunch the remains of the beef was cooling in the kitchen and MIL left the back kitchen door open not being used to dogs, and half a rib of beef went) he is a complete snowflake about food.
DLurcher2 is much more of a dustbin and once scooped up and ate in one snap a very elderly and squashed doner kebab from a pile of leaves the area of which has therefore been inspected carefully for the 6 years since.