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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

Original poster

How do you know it's time?

29 replies

NantsIngonyamaBagithiBaba · 29/12/2022 17:44

My boy has been unwell for some time, and has been slowly declining.

We've made the decision to let him go, and the vet is coming to us next week, as we want him to be at home.

The trouble is, now I've made all those arrangements, it's like he has perked up, and I'm second guessing myself. What if he is lively on the day? I just love him so much, I don't know what to do.

How did you know it was time?

OP posts:
catsnthat · 29/12/2022 17:50

My dog loved a trip in the car, and wagged her tail like crazy when I put her in to go to the vets on the last day. The thing is, for months she had been declining, spending most of her time sleeping, weak on her back legs, going off her food etc. Dogs are good at masking their pain. If you've made the decision you've made it for good reason, it's not fair to keep them going for your own benefit 💐

Paythosebitchesnomind269 · 29/12/2022 17:55

Better a week too early than a day too late x

Blistory · 29/12/2022 18:19

If he's lively on the day, then that gives him a good last day instead of a rushed emergency or another day of pain. There's nothing wrong with saying goodbye to a dog that is happy, comfortable and at home and at the end of his life.

BiteyShark · 29/12/2022 18:26

Better to say goodbye even on a 'good day' than have to rush him in as an emergency.

As others have said dogs mask pain so well so even a good day will just mean it's better than his worst when he can't even pretend he is fine Flowers

Original poster
NantsIngonyamaBagithiBaba · 29/12/2022 19:04

Thank you for the responses, it's given me a much needed kick up the backside.

I truly hadn't thought him having a good day on the day, would be much better.

He's definitely an expert at hiding his pain.

OP posts:
Polkadotties · 29/12/2022 19:15

If you are asking this question, then it’s time Flowers

threeowlsonashelf · 29/12/2022 19:47

I agree it can happen on a good day when there are mostly bad days. I look at mine and it breaks my heart to think I will need to make the decision one day. But I think it is a privilege of being a pet owner and also our responsibility. That unfailing belief they have that we will look after then includes making the right decision to give them a peaceful end rather than some extra time where the bad outweighs the good. You are looking after them by doing this for them even when it breaks your heart.

CMOTDibbler · 29/12/2022 19:54

I think that when you think the time will be soon, the time is today tbh. Much better to be able to give them a lovely last day with chicken nuggets, cuddles, sun and whatever your dog loves most than waiting for things to get really bad

milkymeg · 29/12/2022 19:56

Hugs OP. Everyone says you know when it's time. You made the call because you know. As PPs have said, better now than on a day when he's suffering. Wouldn't we all rather go after our best day ever than in pain and sad? ❤️

theparkisrising · 29/12/2022 20:07

You know it's time. I walked my old boy down to the vets for his last ever visit. He had a lovely sniff on the way and walked into the vets so happy. It broke my heart. But it was right

Unforgettablefire · 29/12/2022 21:03

theparkisrising · 29/12/2022 20:07

You know it's time. I walked my old boy down to the vets for his last ever visit. He had a lovely sniff on the way and walked into the vets so happy. It broke my heart. But it was right

This has made me fill up.

I'm sorry op and to anyone else that's been through this 💐

Daysoffarethebest · 29/12/2022 21:11

We have just gone through this with our beloved dog recently, finally decided to make the appointment and it was as if she knew as she seemed to perk up, I saw it as her way of letting me know she was happy with the decision.
When the time came, she slipped away peacefully rather than have to risk the possibility of being in pain or having to be taken in for some kind of emergency.
I think you know, it’s just never pleasant but it’ll be the last kind thing you can do for him 😔

Original poster
NantsIngonyamaBagithiBaba · 29/12/2022 22:25

Daysoffarethebest · 29/12/2022 21:11

We have just gone through this with our beloved dog recently, finally decided to make the appointment and it was as if she knew as she seemed to perk up, I saw it as her way of letting me know she was happy with the decision.
When the time came, she slipped away peacefully rather than have to risk the possibility of being in pain or having to be taken in for some kind of emergency.
I think you know, it’s just never pleasant but it’ll be the last kind thing you can do for him 😔

I would dearly love it, if this little perk up, is his way of saying thanks mum

Everything I've done for him, for all 14 years of his time here, has been to give him the best life with his best interests fueling those decisions. This is the time I needed to make the most important decision of all. It is breaking my heart, but it isn't about me.

I bloody love that little guy.

OP posts:
userxx · 29/12/2022 22:33

It's very obvious you love him dearly.

Really hard to read this as I'm in the same boat very nearly.

Good luck.

LuckyLucyLeo · 29/12/2022 22:41

Our DDog, after the appointment was booked, he had one of his best days in a long time. I took it as a sign that he was happy and ready. Like he somehow knew & was making the most of his last day.

Original poster
NantsIngonyamaBagithiBaba · 29/12/2022 22:54

I truly am so sorry to everyone who has been through, or will be going through the same

OP posts:
WhatsTheEffingPoint · 29/12/2022 23:10

We had to do this 6mths ago, it still breaks my heart every day thinking did I do the right thing? I know we did the right thing for him but the absolute worst for us.

As you have time, take all the photos, take paw prints (or as I wish I did) the salt dough prints. Give them all their favourite foods, naughty ones included.
I'm so sorry you are going through this, I really do understand your heartache.

daffodilandtulip · 29/12/2022 23:15

My cat was like this for a while. I took her to the vets and because I wasn't sure it was time, I made the arrangements to go back in two days time. She had a seizure, went off her legs, then died the next day while we were out of the room. I wished we had done it the day we first went to the vets. She would have been spared pain and wouldn't have been alone.

MrsBobBlackadder · 29/12/2022 23:16

Polkadotties · 29/12/2022 19:15

If you are asking this question, then it’s time Flowers

Agree with this 100% ^^

We've had to make this decision numerous times now and it's the hardest thing ever. But I've never felt (afterwards) that I made it too early - you do know when the time is right.

Flowers to you

Original poster
NantsIngonyamaBagithiBaba · 30/12/2022 09:27

Thank you all for the responses.

Sadly, we've had a bad night, so it's actually reinforced my decision, and it is time. I think I feel calmer this morning? That I'm coming to terms with it.

That said, for the last 2 nights I've not slept much. Mostly laying awake, listening to him breathing and snoring away, and telling myself this time next week I won't be hearing it anymore. Then I'll get myself upset and have a little cry.

I'm definitely going to make the salt dough pawprints today, thank you for the suggestion.

OP posts:
Catttt · 30/12/2022 19:08

So sorry you are going through this.
We had to say goodbye to our little 14 year old dog today. She had been declining for a little while but not enough that we felt like she wasn’t still enjoying her life. But today we just knew it was time.
It’s heartbreaking to let them go, but I can honestly say it was so peaceful.
Her favourite vet nurse came to say goodbye when we arrived, and our little dog was given chocolates by the vet as she was now finally allowed them (apparently it’s their new tradition to do with all dogs saying goodbye at our vets , was really sweet and a lovely moment).
I know she had the best life and her final moments were being cuddled and so full of love

Original poster
NantsIngonyamaBagithiBaba · 02/01/2023 16:55

We lost him today.

My heart is broken.

OP posts:
mutleyschuckle · 02/01/2023 17:23

So so sorry x

KnottyKnitting · 02/01/2023 17:43

Oh I am so sorry for your loss.

It's just heartbreaking- I really feel for you- we went through similar a few weeks ago. Our 15 year old old lady had been declining for quite a while and needed lots of help. It was such a hard decision as she never lost interest in her food but it was time. As many say on here- better a week too early than a day too late. We gave her lots of cuddles and the vet came to our house which made such a difference as she had started to become so frightened at the vets. She was asleep in her basket at the end and it was very peaceful.

Take care x

WhatsTheEffingPoint · 02/01/2023 17:47

So sorry. X