Having a panic

[bailarbailar]

Hi all,

We've been waiting to get a dog for 10 years, done a tonne of research and we're prepared for our lives to change, and are finally in a position to do so. We picked up 9-week-old puppy on Saturday and I'm having a total 'WTF have we done' panic. She wants to play all the time but gets overtired quickly but won't settle. She's biting everything, obviously i redirect her but sometimes it's because she's clearly tired but won't calm down. We have puppy classes in January, and have contacted a trainer to give us some support but I'm really panicked we've done the wrong thing. Is this a normal feeling? Does it pass? She doesn't have her second injections for another 10 days, so not sure when we can start going out for walks

Even with our 5th ddog we had the W

WTF have we done moments!!
Pic or no dpuppy op!!

Yep, normal and it will pass. Pic? What breed did you get OP?

Pic on a rare quiet moment

Perfectly normal, we were the same waiting a long time to get a puppy, for me to finish work so would be home with puppy. First few days were great, crate training went well as did toilet training, but the biting was really bad. My DH and 2 adult sons would leave the room, leaving me to deal with him. I would put him in time out and say no biting. We were putting him to bed at 8.30 to get some peace. But yes it gets better, once you know what they want and they learn to rest, the more you do with them, the more they want.

Ah the Puppy Blues!
Happens to everyone.
Puppies are little shits. It’s why they are so cute, to make up for them actually being the devil in fur coats.

It doesn’t last. Promise!

Absolutely promise you that this is normal and it will get better!
Get a puppy pen if you dont have one - no exaggeration the best money we spent. Gives you space when you get overwhelmed with biting, keeps them out of the way, plus we did enforced naptimes in ours when she was overtired and wouldnt settle with us - put her in with a cosy blanket and a chew, turned the lights/tv down low and ignored her, worked a treat when she was younger (was trickier when she found her voice to ignore her but by then she knew the drill and would give up eventually)
Yakkers are great and if you go on JR pet products they do puppy bundles of great appealing dog chews suitable for 4+ and 12+ weeks - my dog hated the plastic nylabones etc, so makes sense to make the alternative to your fingers a bit tasty!

Don't worry, it does pass. All of my dogs have been rescues and all have taken a while to settle in. There seems to, for me anyway, have been a point when things just suddenly "click", maybe around three weeks, where the dog realises that this is their home now and this is where their place in the "pack hierarchy" is.

My Staffie, Jasper, took a while to settle and it was quite challenging to begin with - I had serious thoughts about returning him. But he went on to be an outstanding companion and one of the truly best dogs I've ever known. He literally saved my life when I had an accident on Dartmoor. He passed away 10 years ago and I still miss him sometimes.

It will be alright. And your pup is a sweetheart. It's a big adjustment and can be very unsettling if it doesn't always go the way you imagined it. But with time, patience and understanding this phase will pass. It sounds like you are doing the right things; the dog is lucky to have found a home with you. It will be alright in time.

Best wishes to you. x

Hi OP, I'm in the same boat. Puppy is 9 weeks old today and we've had him a week. I am okay at the minute, but DP genuinely thinks we've ruined our life. I did a thread on here a good few months ago, asking if getting a puppy with 6yo and 3yo DC was madness, and Mumsnet have me a resounding yes. But, I didn't listen and here we are. 🤣 To be fair to my puppy, he is a very good dog (at the minute). But it can be overwhelming at times! Here is my guy

Yep, that's puppyhood for you

Oh she's tiny, sooo cute
Don't worry OP, it's perfectly normal to panic.
We often imagine that having a puppy is a sort of Disney moment, cuddles, soft play, running in the garden with a big smile...
Well it's not, it's demanding, exhausting, and a bit dull and mundane sometimes.

Three things:

1. your life has changed drastically within days. Of course you're panicking. Good news is: puppy stage doesn't last long and you'll all adjust to this new life real quick.

2. your puppy is very very very young, she's a baby, and she's been with you for just 2 days, it's nothing! I have mine for a bit over a week, and it's a different pup each day. When he arrived, he was scared of going out. Now he's cocking around in the garden like it's Lord Pup's Estate.
   What feels overwhelming for you now will feel very approachable in two days.

3. keep a puppy journal to log wees and poos, adjust a puppy schedule, plan training sessions and reflect.

4. have low expectations. It's a baby. You woudn't expect a new-born to say "Mother, I'm hungry, can you please provide substenance?", well it's the same for a puppy. Don't set her up for failure by having high expectations. Dogs do something you ask them to if:

• they know what is expected from them
• they have enough incentive to do so

Never assume your dog knows what you want.

And allow me to add a 5)
You'll make mistakes. It's fine. Dog training is a lot of trial and errors. You won't break your puppy by making mistakes. As long as you provide a safe and positive environment, she'll be perfectly fine.

Thanks everyone, she's settled now after 2 hours of jumping, biting etc. Any tips to help settler her more quickly?
I'm very relieved this is normal, I feel like I just want to press fast forward though!

My now middle dog resisted all attempts at sleep. I used to pop her in a crate and sing her lullabies til she settled. She would throw tantrums, with big sleepy eyes, then lie down and glare at me refusing to give in to sleep.

sometimes the lullabies had rude words, because that’s life with a puppy.

my current youngster would self settle. I’d pop her in a crate with a chew, and she’d gum herself to sleep. I thought I’d won the puppy lottery! Then she grew into the teenager from hell.

puppies are hard.

She's just adorable OP, really beautiful.

What breed is she? Was thinking border terrier but hard to tell when she's curled up like that.

My girl (border) was a dreadful shark in the puppy days and I learned that the more bitey she was the more tired she was so when she was extra nippy I would put her in her crate for a sleep. She had two long sleeps per day in the crate and I was very regimented about it, she used to nap for a couple of hours about 10.30am and the same again about 3pm.

When I brought her home at 8 weeks I had a trainer come round to the house and we really focused on how to deal with the biting which did help. She's 2 now and an absolute delights but the first couple of months were quite challenging. Hang on it there, it does get easier and if you get the training right you will end up with a fantastic dog.

It's tough right now but it will get better!

Just hold on OP, I know it's what-have-I-done thing at first but over the month it gets easier and they calm. Focus first on the mouthing, if you can master that at least you've solved the worst bit.

Soon that little figure grows a bit they will be your unconditional best friend, it's definitely worth it.

Trying to remember some tips my trainer gave me for the biting.

when puppy goes for your hands make your hand go rigid and they will let go - this was a life saver

Do not ear anything baggy or with bits dangling off - this is red rag to a bull lol

When attacking feet when you're walking ignore and carry on walking as usual - in ideal word this does work but it's impossible to ignore a dog biting bare feet.

Don't shout, scream, leap about or anything like that when they are shark mode as they think you are playing and it makes it worse. I tried to be firm but calm, and just remove her without really saying much.

Before my pup had her second lot of jabs I used to go out with her zipped in my hoodie, another thing the trainer told me to do as it helps with socialisation

Drink wine.....lots and lots of wine.

My border terrier is now 2 1/2 but was the most crazy, hyperactive and outgoing puppy. It’s really not representative of how she turned out which is largely pretty lazy except when we’re on a walk.

It is undeniably hard work but by 6 months old we were through the worst and at 1yr she became largely sensible.

@GertrudeBell my 2.5 year old border is sensible, until she sees a squirrel and then goes remarkably deaf 😂
Apart from that she's brilliant and yes, unless she's out on a walk she's very chilled and lazy.

@Dozycuntlaters @GertrudeBell thank you so much, that makes me feel better

Totally and utterly normal OP, anyone that says any different is a liar, I can remember thinking what the hell have I done. It will get easier, it’s worth the hassle.

And yes she is a border terrier!

Your puppy needs to bite, it’s an important developmental stage - just give them suitable things to bite on.
Toys, chews etc
Get a bag or puppy sling and take puppy out to see the world. Traffic, other dogs, people, hats, umbrellas, wheelchairs, bikes, trains, cafes etc this is key - don’t wait for jabs.

Just keep pup off the ground so they don’t lick other dogs’ pee/poo.

@bailarbailar you'll be fine. Borders are fantastic dogs, I wouldn't ever be without one. I see friends with other dogs and I always thank god I've got a border. They're funny, stubborn, full of character but so chilled too. Enjoy her, despite the wtf have I done moments once the initial puppy stage passes you will be so thankful for her.

This is my girl

Very cute! Believe me, when they get older you would pray for one mad day of puppyhood. It’s generally fleeting, Labradors are probably the worst puppies ever! It can last years.

Kong toy, stuff with food and doggy peanut butter (not too much) freeze and give to dog. Probably best for summer, or if you want to leave them. I would build up leaving a dog for around 3/4 hours regardless as you may need to leave them at some point and separation anxiety is awful!

I had the same feelings. The anxiety was crippling and totally unexpected but the sleep deprived weeks passed by and even though the house was chaotic and I was using so much more energy doing everything for this little shit...I realised I was also gaining energy and he was slowly improving my life and my wellbeing. He's 15 months now and he's a high energy, dirty and silly boy but oh my god I'm in love. We do everything together and the kids adore him. He's brought a happiness into the home that's priceless. It took me a good few months to adjust OP so give yourself some time and don't panic.