Altercation on walk that made me cry

[fruitstick]

Have taken dog for lovely walk. Met lots of lovely people and dogs, lovely chats, very much the perfect walk.

Dog is a spaniel so a friendly sort but very gentle, plays nicely etc.

Walking back along the road (most of our walk is off lead) on the lead and there is a woman behind us when I cross the road with a small dog. Chihuahua/Pomeranian type. She walks quicker than me so after about 100 yards catches us up.

Dog is being a pain and desperately trying to go backwards to say hello. I stop and tell her to go ahead but she says no. Carry on another 100 yards, my dog still trying to turn round again so I say 'no, honestly, you go ahead' but she says no, she doesn't like people walking behind her.

I figure fair enough, who I am to question it. So I carry on but she is very close behind me and I realise I don't really like people walking behind me either!

Then we come across a lorry parked on the pavement, so I go round it one way and she goes the other, so by the time we get round the lorry she is in front. She stops to let me go in front of her again and my dog, who by this time is excited, goes to say hello to her dog (sniff noses) and SHE KICKS HIM OUT OF THE WAY

I tell her not to kick my dog and then she says 'well why is he behaving like that'

I say because he wants to say hello to your dog. I tell her to go in front of me and she refuses again, so I tell her to stay where she is until we are around the corner because she is not walking 2m behind me and kicking my dog.

I march off.

I'm so upset.

He's a friendly sort but I don't let him say hello to every dog, but normally the dog who doesn't want to be said hello to quickly moves past or, if it's a reactive dog, they keep their distance and my dog gets over it fairly quickly.

If it happens again just “change your mind” about which direction you are going in until she is out of sight. That is the only thing you could’ve done to avoid the situation which wasn’t of your making.

She sounds mad, my dog would have hated having another dog walking straight behind him and I would have stopped to let them pass.

If she refused to go in front I think there'd have been a stand off!!

Anyone kicking my dog would get a mouthful, disgusting way to behave and completely unnecessary.

My dog would have done the same as yours. He would keep turning around to look. I would too if someone was walking fast behind me but not going past. It would freak me out. I think she was spoiling for a fight. Nasty piece of work.

She wouldn't be kicking anything else if she'd kicked my dog.

Absolutely ridiculous. She'd be picking her teeth up off the floor if she'd kicked my dog. Bitch!

If it's any consolation OP I had a really horrible confrontation yesterday too. I had my two dogs on the lead in the park and were constantly harassed by a young puppy. Completely out of the owners control. She stood in the middle of the park shouting for it to come back but never made a move to come get it. Fortunately my reactive dog handled it ok initially. On my way out of the park it once again made a beeline for us. I asked her to put it on the lead so we could get past and I got a huge amount of abuse! Nor did she put her dog on the lead. I pulled out my phone and recorded the whole incident and have sent it to the dog warden.
She then continued to allow her dog to run riot around the car park too. Accused me of trying to run her over when I turned my car engine on and was generally vile.

There's a reason I rarely walk my dogs in public anymore.

Sorry you're upset.
She seems an odd bugger and not worthy of your tears.
I'm surprised though you haven't met more as some dog walkers behave like drivers who turn into the rudest a holes once they get behind the wheel.

Some very bizarre responses here. I don't see what else the OP could have done. I find the "not wanting to walk in front" thing a bit odd, especially in a village where there will quite often be people walking their dogs and someone's got to be in front. Ours used to look round if there were dogs behind but he grew out of the habit.

And in similar circumstances I would've been hugely tempted to kick the other owner but I hope I'd just come out with some very robust words.

I would kick her up the hole if she kicked my dog 😏 on a more serious note, she had no right to do that and you're right to be upset.

Try and put it behind you and lots of cuddles with the dog!

She would have regretted kicking my dog.

I think some people are just looking for confrontation, I can't see that you've done anything wrong, so try not to agonise on what you may or may not have done.
I remember years ago we had a dog that loved swimming.
Me and DH were sat on picnic tables near a local lake, throwing a ball in the water for dog. It was clear what we were doing and we had a wet dog with us. Some stupid cow decided to come and sit next to us, there was no shortage of other tables she could have picked, then started moaning loudly how she was going to smash my face in, if she got wet ?
There are plenty of arseholes in this world looking to start a fight, the trick is to recognise it's their problem, not yours and don't let them spoil every other positive experience you've with your dog.

OP, I agree with you and I think you are getting some unfair responses here.

She sounds fucking unhinged. If she ever came anywhere near my dog I'd kick her back!!

I can't understand why she'd walk so closely up to you, invade your personal space, refuse to pass and then kick your poor dog when she essentially encroached on your space. She sounds like an entitled twat.

I think in future if you meet paths with her again just just turn around in the opposite direction and let her walk far enough in front of you.

she sounds like a prize idiot, what a horrid selfish person!!! I’m definitely one to say “I would have done xyz” but in truth I hate confrontation and would have just been glad to get home … and sometimes the best way to de-escalate things is just to walk away! Especially from a weirdo like her

It actually reminds me of something from a few years ago… was once in a shopping centre when it was closing, a woman was fairly rude to me (very sharp in asking questions about the car park, told me to couldn’t I be quicker when i tried to help Google info for her), wanted me to walk her to her car (and then me to mine alone!), was rude when I made small talk, walked her to her car and she told me meanly not to take her car details!!

basically… very dependent on others, but VERY mean about it!!! A bit like having a very random boss, bossing you around in a public place. Weird entitled people everywhere!

(And I went home and cried a bit)

There’s a growing trend on tiktok of people with reactive dogs thinking that any dog that comes close to theirs can be kicked.

I’ve yet to see a video where the approaching dog appears to be a threat.

Some of this dog reactivity is actually caused by owners who refuse to allow their dog to sort out its differences with another dog. Preferring to scoop them up and rush them away. It’s getting quite ridiculous.

It doesn’t matter if the other dog is a threat or not, dogs should not be approaching on lead dogs at all.

I'd have given her a good kick to see how she liked it.

You lost me at ‘Dog is a spaniel so a friendly sort’. No breed is ‘a friendly sort’ it depends solely on their personality and if we are being picky cocker spaniels are actually prone to sudden range syndrome.

also @LolaButt the dogs approaching may not be a threat but the dog they are approaching may be, they may not like other dogs approaching and people should respect that. My dog is reactive to men, I’ve met men just like you that think they know better and think I’m being over the top who have nearly lost their hand when they’ve shoved it in my dogs face.

if I had been walking my dog and someone asked me to pass and go in front id have said no as well, my dog would probably have reacted to yours ( especially if they are over friendly trying to get in her face ) and then she’d have been looking back the whole time. I don’t know why you couldn’t just keep walking or walk somewhere else, turn around I don’t know but it’s not down to people to just move when you say.

You’ve never owned a reactive dog, have you?

Many a time I’ve wished I could just scoop one up, unfortunately they’ve always been too big.

This.

My childhood dog was reactive. If we met other dogs we turned around, altered our route sometime multiple times or waited (facing hedge) until they passed.

If you have a dog that doesn't like mixing (and plenty don't) you can't afford to faff around saying you don't like people walking behind you. Put the dog first.

I didn't let my dog approach. That was the problem.

And you wouldn't go in front because your dog would be looking behind, and yet someone it's fine that someone walks up close behind me and then objects to my dog turning round to try to get to hers.

That makes no sense.

I did keep walking, until she got in front of me and stopped so I had no choice but to pass her on a narrow pavement.

Thank you for all your replies.

I think I can safely say I'm over it now, and luckily haven't encountered her again.

I didn't let my dog approach

But surely you did?

my dog, who by this time is excited, goes to say hello to her dog

When did every thread begin to generate AIBU-style responses?

So many posters have loftily laid into the OP for no reason. I bet those posters, if they even have dogs, are not the perfect, no-nonsense, gruff, tweed-dressed owner bullshit they’re trying to suggest in their responses.