Altercation on walk that made me cry

[fruitstick]

Have taken dog for lovely walk. Met lots of lovely people and dogs, lovely chats, very much the perfect walk.

Dog is a spaniel so a friendly sort but very gentle, plays nicely etc.

Walking back along the road (most of our walk is off lead) on the lead and there is a woman behind us when I cross the road with a small dog. Chihuahua/Pomeranian type. She walks quicker than me so after about 100 yards catches us up.

Dog is being a pain and desperately trying to go backwards to say hello. I stop and tell her to go ahead but she says no. Carry on another 100 yards, my dog still trying to turn round again so I say 'no, honestly, you go ahead' but she says no, she doesn't like people walking behind her.

I figure fair enough, who I am to question it. So I carry on but she is very close behind me and I realise I don't really like people walking behind me either!

Then we come across a lorry parked on the pavement, so I go round it one way and she goes the other, so by the time we get round the lorry she is in front. She stops to let me go in front of her again and my dog, who by this time is excited, goes to say hello to her dog (sniff noses) and SHE KICKS HIM OUT OF THE WAY

I tell her not to kick my dog and then she says 'well why is he behaving like that'

I say because he wants to say hello to your dog. I tell her to go in front of me and she refuses again, so I tell her to stay where she is until we are around the corner because she is not walking 2m behind me and kicking my dog.

I march off.

I'm so upset.

He's a friendly sort but I don't let him say hello to every dog, but normally the dog who doesn't want to be said hello to quickly moves past or, if it's a reactive dog, they keep their distance and my dog gets over it fairly quickly.

I'm not sure how anyone who has read your post properly could possibly think you are in anyway to blame. My dog hates to be followed (not reactive, just is very uncomfortable with it) so there's no way I'd be so stupid as to follow close behind another dog walker. She should have held back.

And unless her dog was actually under attack (rather than a friendly spaniel saying hello) there is no possible excuse for her to kick. She sounds unhinged. If her dog is reactive she should have made that clear and not contrived to be so close to you and your dog.

That doesn't mean the dogs had to interact or that OP couldn't have just carried on walking though.

I agree with that.

Why not just walk on by?

How horrible! That would have really upset me too op; I'm indignant for you! You did nothing wrong. But, in your position, I would definitely have double backed to avoid putting my dog in an overwhelming situation where he would behave badly through no fault of his own. (And I'm contrary so being ordered about by an entitled random would ensure I did the exact opposite of what they had "instructed"! 😁). At the moment she told me to go ahead, I would have walked straight past her in the opposite direction, without acknowledging her existence. Who the hell does she think she is??!

Kicking is out of line. My small dog met an off lead "friendly" collie the other day. This creature had appalling recall and wanted to make friends with everyone. My dog didn't take kindly to the intrusion but it would never have crossed my mind to kick it. I lifted my dog and moved away.

OP Do not allow something like this make you cry. Its my guess you cried out of frustration more than upset.
The situation was mishandled by you because you had no idea she was going to be so horrid and awkward.
Don't let it happen again !

Yours sincerely a fellow dog walker🤗

A better option would have been to have said "Well, you can either go in front of me or you can wait until I reach [that lamppost/parked car/other landmark] before starting to follow me. Which would you prefer?" Work on your assertiveness.

Or you could have just walked a little way in the opposite direction and then turned round again so she was by default in front of you.

But I'm sorry she kicked your dog. What a witch!

If she walked that fast that she caught up with you, there was absolutely no reason why she shouldn’t have accepted your offer to let her pass and marched on. It seems to me like she was trying to intimidate you and spoiling for a fight. Did she literally kick your dog or was it more her using her foot to push it away? If the former I would’ve kicked the bitch back.

What a horrible experience. Some people on this thread don't seem to understand the situation (although your description was perfectly clear). In hindsight it is easy for others to say that you should have behaved differently, but I don't think you did anything wrong at all. Kicking your dog was a terrible thing for that deranged person to do. I hope your poor pup is O.K.

I think this post sums it up very well. I am very wary of dogs. I do not one walking behind me as I like to know where they are. I get told time and time again that someone’s dog wants to say hello or they are just being friendly . I don’t want this. You should have kept your dog away. I would have pushed the dog away with my foot.

You can’t kick her back. That would be assault. Don’t compare dogs with humans the same rules don’t apply.

Kicking a dog is also assault.

Kicking a dog is horrible;she shouldn't have done that.

At the same time you should be using a leash as your don't have complete control of your dog

He was on a lead!

Awful of her to kick your dog. Next time stop so she'll have to overtake you. Then wait for the loon to go out of sight

But why would you walk directly behind another dog and then stop and wait for it if you’re wary of other dogs?

What the woman in the op did, doesn’t make any sense... she didn’t want the ops dog near, but also wanted to walk right behind her, refused an offer to overtake and sabotaged the ops attempt of putting more distance between them.

That sounds awful OP. If I was you (and your lovely dog wasn't hurt) I would try to move on buy congratulating myself that I am not a horrible person like she is!

What a weirdo, totally with you OP you did nothing wrong, I would say most dogs would turn around if another dog was right behind!

We also have narrow pavements but luckily can cross the road and whenever our friendly neighbours with dogs who would be very happy to meat off lead in the park come across, one of us will cross the road or walk in the road as those meetings can be quite uncomfortable.

She sounds like a thoughtless, selfish idiot. You did nothing wrong (other than doing what she told you to do). I’d have told her she needed to go In front or wait until you were well ahead, or you weren’t moving. And when she kicked my dog I’d have taken a photo of her and told her I’d be plastering it over social media saying she’s a dog abuser. Then I’d have shouted at her to get away from me and been louder and louder until she realised that staying close to me and my dog was going to be more unpleasant than walking ahead!

Argh, OP I have a dog that needs space and this is my worst nightmare.

I haven't read the whole thread, but phrases I use when people are asshats and ignore our yellow lead slip cover include

"Please give us some space"
"My dog is uncomfortable with how close you are"
"Stay back please"
"Let me move out of the way"
Or if they continue determindly marching towards us, I just raise my hand in the air and say "WAIT" or "STOP"

To be honest, my non reactive, sweet as you like goldie would also not do well in this situation. Don't feel bad- you weren't in the wrong here.

Yup this! She sounds bonkers and nasty

90% of dogs would want to turn round and sniff or play if someone was following them closely with another dog. It’s common sense to leave a decent gap.

Did you even read the OP's posts or just pick an answer you liked? Her dog was with her on a lead and ahead. The other woman caught up with her from behind but refused to pass her AND refused to back off. Dogs - LIKE YOU - don't actually like another dog up their backside, and will turn to see what it is doing there.

My dog wouldn't come up to you anyway, but if you did as she did and came up behind me at close quarters, then "pushed it away with your foot" I would shove your foot down your throat. A kick is a kick, no matter what you say.

She sounds insane.

Next time if you see her/ same situation arises I simply wouldn’t move.

I wouldn’t engage. If she speaks first I’d say go around me, I’m not moving. If you feel bad, say you have a cramp!

@2bazookas it sounds to me like Pomeranian lady was walking too close. How is it OP’s fault. You have no right to tell someone where to walk!

If it's a minor consolation, I think most people who own a dog encounter a few people or situations that are upsetting, especially when their dog is young and still very interested in other dogs. I used to be very vocal about these things and argue back, but it took too long for the adrenaline to deplete so these days I prefer to bite my tongue, get my (usually very well behaved dog) to heel, and exit the situation with zero confrontation. Some people just like to be arses.

@fruitstick she's fucking crackers. Go have a massive 🍷and a good swear.

What was she going to do if you decided to stop for half an hour? What is she your bloody shadow? BONKERS