How to approach a reactive/timid dog?

[Dreamwhisper]

Hi! We have had rescue dogs all our lives and some of them have had behavioural issues that we have managed to settle really well. However we are going to view a rescue dog that we have fallen in love with on Friday. She is a very large dog and is apparently very sweet but reactive to people she doesn't know. I'd really appreciate any tips from anyone who is experienced or has also adopted a dog like this. I really want to give this the best chance of working out as our family setup and lifestyle matches really well to the dog and we would love to home her, but we need to make sure we are comfortable and confident handling her and I feel like a good first meeting would go miles towards this

Obviously usual caveat of all dogs being different etc applying...

But hopefully the meet up is planned on neutral ground outdoors/walk where dog can destress or be distracted by current owners?

I always found that, as much as needed, largely ignoring dog initially (no direct approaches, no voice stimulation etc unless they initiate) and letting them just be around us, sniff us where needed, soft positive voice if they are calm and seem interested/initiating, but basically putting zero pressure on dog for anything... treats sometimes helped if food- motivated dog too but again only if dog showing interest in me already... if not and they just wanted to walk away or spend their time metres away from me thats fine, they will still get used to your presence and voice from a distance even if it takes multiple "meets" like that before they choose to approach..

Its so hard as persons natural urge is to initiate contact, reassure, engage... whereas all the dogs natural urges may be to run/growl/cower etc...

Sorry if none of that is helpful 😅😅

My last hugely reactive foster dog only took 24hrs to come round and after full day and night of me leaving him to his own devices, he woke up and just decided I was his new human... but others take weeks to do that and even then can struggle so patience i guess ❤️❤️❤️

Iin your title you say how to approach a timid dog - dont!

No eye contact be side on if possible stand still and be quiet. Ignore the dog and let the dog approach you.

IF and a big if you are using treats ( a timid dog probably will not eat them) do not lure the dog to you but drop treats behind the dog or yoyu then move away from the treat so they can move away from you to eat them and they can make the choice to move nearer to you to get next treat which should always be dropped away from you until they are ready to approach.

Dropping food may in itself be too much for some timid dogs so on all of these take advice from the carers with the dog at the moment

Thank you both! That's helpful advice regarding the treats as the shelter have recommended bringing treats. They use the Open Paw system so that the dogs should hopefully be used to approaching the door for treats!

Don't approach the dog, let it approach you. Let it sniff you, and don't even try to touch the dog at first. Indeed, don't make eye contact.

You need to be as non threatening as possible and let the dog sort things out in its own time.

Don't force the dog into an interaction with you - if you have treats then toss them on the ground near the dog.

I know someone (very experienced dog owners) who had a rescue dog that wouldn't come in the house when the husband was in. For six months. The dog slept outside (it had always been in kennels beforehand so not a huge difference for the dog). The same dog came around in the end and was asking for belly rubs from my partner within 10 minutes of meeting him!

A bit like the hare and the tortoise, the slower you go initially the faster you'll get there in the end.

Like all of the above, take your time and treats. Chicken is a good one.
I'm sure you'll be ok having had rescues before, you'll have an instinct so follow that. Oh and don't go above her head to pet her when she does come to you.

Well done on the rescues 💐 Hoping to see pics on your good work

Definitely let her approach you, and don't expect too much on the first meeting. We met our extremely reactive GSD at the rescue. She went for a walk with us, then DH took her a bit further alone. When she saw me waiting she went mad, barking, lunging, snarling etc. I got a fright, but we reasoned that it was because I was up on a height, dressed all in black, and she was scared.

It took time, but she's friendly and laid back now.

@Dreamwhisper also dont be worried about walking away if the dog is not the right fit for your family.

Very human reactive dogs can be very very hard to live with and may need you to make major changes to your life. Equally yourl life style and location may need this is the best thing for both of you. However do be honest and you are not failing or giving up on the dog if it is not something you can deal with.

It is fine to not want to have to or not feel able to deal with some dog.

Really hope the meeting goes well for you all.

Thank you

Yes you are right. I have a strange feeling that it's either going to go very well or very badly and be more of a say thank you for your time and turn the car around situation

The size will definitely be a factor. We would have to be very confident in the dog and our relationship with them to risk that as she is humongous!

@Dreamwhisper You sound like you have realistic approach and are totally aware of the size factor so are already ahead of many who take on rescues/reactive dogs :)

Ive only had large rescues/reactive ones and the fact is you do have to be even more disciplined (with yourself and them lol) and consistent as the consequences of a big dog causing harm can be so major and even smaller incidents feel and are viewed as more major by others too. (Small dogs bark and growl at mine and noone bats an eyelid but if mine ever did same to their little dogs they would be horrified!!)

Trust your gut on the day and see how the dog is - if youre unsure then arrange a second meet and see if that helps clarify things for both you and dog, and good luck!

Agree with PPs about no eye contact and ignoring dog.
It took me a year to stop my my rescue GSD from barking whenever someone he didn't know came to the house. They'd try to make friends with him, offer treats etc which made him worse.
One day I had a lightbulb moment and told people to completely ignore dog, and avoid eye contact and it worked brilliantly. Dog just potters about doing his usual thing, even when I had workmen replacing all the windows and doors for 3 days.

"Human reactivity" is a huge red flag to me. It's generally a nice way of saying "this dog has a bite history and is aggressive to humans".

I know you have a lot of experience and are willing to walk away, but please be very careful meeting this dog, especially as you say it's a large breed/mix.

Personally I would not use any food with an unknown reactive dog unless it's securely muzzled as you don't know what could trigger it to snap at you. In fact, if it's not muzzled I would walk away completely.

PP's are describing how to entice a timid dog - but timid is not the same as being reactive. They're two very different kettles of fish. The former can be worked with - gain their trust and they're normally absolutely fine, but reactive is very different and you'll need to be on full alert for their whole lives to keep them under control - so walking them on a lead with a muzzle - no off-lead walks or runs in case they approach a stranger.

It's a huge huge commitment and not one I would take on personally. You will also struggle when it comes to finding holiday care or a dog walker if that's something you'll need going forward. As a dog walker myself I don't take on dogs that are people reactive as it's too much of a risk to my own safety and that of the public.

It may take a few meets- I’ve recently started dog walking and some are aloof. You don’t see their personality for a few weeks. Trust takes time, treats help.
Let the dog come to you.

Let us know how it goes.

Thank you all these responses are so helpful!

I am very concerned though about someone mentioning that "reactive" means aggressive to humans as the reason we are considering her is because on her profile they have absolutely gushed about how good and gentle with children she is and how much she loves them. @Bizzyone you sound like you've had a lot of similar dogs, is this a red flag do you think?

We are definitely already convinced that this will take more than one meeting, I'm really excited about tomorrow though!

@Dreamwhisper its hard to know what someone means sometimes when they say "reactive" so get as much specific detail from current placement as possible - eg where, when, whom, what are the triggers as dogs are often reactive to specific things (unless like a previous poster said its aggression towards all or most humans in which case they are usually spending lots of time in residential rehab or should only be rehomed with specific people, however I disagree with certain points made as have known even one of those dogs to have a successfully albeit specific rehoming but that took a while and rehabbing him waa most stressful experience of my life!!...)

If a dog is reactive to strangers in the home, new people on the street, and by reactive they mean growling lunging and barking then you will know after a few meets how manageable that is for you... (eg if ir doesnt improve once dog knows you and with all the strategies above then it may not be viable) for some dogs food is a trigger, loud noises, open spaces, men is a common one (sorry men!!), hiviz jackets send some dogs loopy too!

Even with the children thing - my current dog loves children age about 7+ but is nervous around toddlers if they move too fast or start grabbing/trying to stroke too soon after meeting etc.. if you have kids or visiting children you would still have to train the kids and supervise at all time even with a dog thats good withkids but am sure you know that!

Do you know why they are rehoming the dog if they are so gushing about it?? How specific and honest are the reactivity details you have about them?? Also how does the dogs current set up differ from yours?? (Eg is it in busy house whereas yours is quiet, are you going to be around more than current owners ans have they done any consistent training to address issues?)

There is no way on this earth I would rehome a dog that's reactive to humans if I had children in my house.

Absolutely no way. It's not worth the risk. If it reacts to a visiting child that's game over.

Hm. I’d be wondering what they mean by ‘reactive’.
How old are your children? How big is the dog?

Is the rescue a decent one? We looked at so many dogs where they said ‘no children’, just because they weren’t totally sure about how they were with children, so the idea that a rescue is willing to home a reactive to human dog with children seems really surprising. I would be really, really careful.

I think with the children thing too (and apologies if you are on top of this!) Many people underestimate just how much work it is to constantly supervise children and dogs in the home.. kids like to move around a lot after all and we all need toilet breaks etc - unless a house has plenty of break out areas and rooms that can be separated with gates etc it can be a challenge having eyes on kids and dogs 24/7 🙈😳

I’m on my second in a row reactive to strange humans dog (for 2 different reasons, promise it’s not because they’re mine 😂)

Neither have/had ever bitten anyone, last dog I had from 7 weeks old, current one from 5 months but he didn’t display any reactive behaviours in rescue (almost wish he had because I’d not have adopted him tbh)

Both have been completely fine, happy, relaxed and affectionate with people once they’ve got to know them, but that’s been very different with both.

previous dog two or three decent length visits of being crated, then ignored and he was their best friend...current dog is much trickier and very very slow to accept new people, as in there are a couple of people he’s known for neatly 18 months that we still have to very heavily manage him around and only one or two he’s ok with.

so it’s very different with different dogs.

I will add, though, it’s not as tricky as that if you just always keep the dog near you tbh, if you’re find with a dog in the bathroom with you it’s pretty easy really, lol.

As long as you’re only having to watch for normal stuff I mean, not a dog that’s got issues with children.

I know what you mean I guess I just meant the nature of house full of children can be unpredictable - doors opening suddenly on landings, kids rushing between rooms and playfighting etc.. and layout of the house eg where dogs bed/safe space is etc. Not impossible but how easy it is can be variable depending on the dog and children 😅

I would avoid a Rescue that offers a dog that is reactive to humans to a home with children in.
Reactive to humans suggests potentially dangerous

Absolutely, realistically though if it’s a dog that wouldn’t be happy round children it’s just not the right dog.

But my last dog was completely normal with us and absolutely fine with people he’d been introduced to nice and slowly, so inside the house it was just normal dog stuff, no different to the problem free dog I’d had when the DC were very little. Just run interference from hassly poky children and take him with me when I left the room.

Current dog would need heavy management to live with children so if I had any child age ones now - he would have had to go back to the rescue.

So it’s fair to mention it could be an issue, just if the dog is more like my last one than my current one it would only be settling in that’s trickier and that’s true of any dog anyway.

Exactly.

It's different if you're an adult-only household with experience and lots of time and space to segregate the dog, but children (especially young children) are unpredictable and don't listen to instructions.

I've also seen numerous threads on here where older children and teenagers have ignored instructions and bothered a normally placid dog while it was asleep/taken a chew away/accidentally tripped over the dog in it's bed and been bitten as a result.

A human reactive dog in a household with children is a disaster waiting to happen.

@Dreamwhisper Reactive and Timid are two entirely different things.
Personally you need to find as much information as possible on the background of this dog. Reactivity has a trigger what triggers the Reactivity?. Also reactivity can turn into aggression. Notice I say " Can".
How large is the dog what breed has the reactivity ever involved aggression towards people.
Never approach a reactive dog. The best thing in my experience is to avoid eye contact and ignore them giving distance. If you have no experience with reactivity don't take the dog. You need to find the background out. Reactive dogs are a lot of hard work. It's strange that a rescue would offer a reactive dog unless you have a lot of experience with these type of dogs?

We have a nervous reactive rescue and, shock horror, kids.
She was used in a puppy farm so had no idea about the outside world when we got her so she used to and will still react if something scares her.
When we first met her and when she meets new people now it's all about ignoring her. She very quickly comes around but her go to status is react. This just looks like a big bark now but used to involve a bit of foot stamping too.
She is getting better and absolutely adores her people. I couldn't wish for a better dog with the kids.
She will always be a work in progress.
They need experience, confidence and time. And lots and lots of patience.