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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

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Original poster

Devastated, but can't avoid it - need to PTS our dog.

38 replies

RoseyOldCrow · 22/02/2021 14:25

It's finally come to the point where our 10yo dog has to leave us, simply because of aggression.

He has a history of anxiety (triggered we believe by a violent event as a puppy) & has always been very protective & noise sensitive; unfortunately he has worsened over the last two years, with the anxiety seguing into aggression.

We have tried everything, from specialist behavioural trainers to medications, with the support of our wonderful vet practice. Believe me when I say that we have exhausted every option. The vet agrees that we have reached the point where there is no option.

Today, he attacked me twice in the vet's waiting room as I tried to soft-muzzle him before a routine appt - we even have to sedate him for that, he is so anxious. He drew blood.

I hate what we are having to do, but morally I know it's the right thing - we can't risk any more injuries. But I am heartbroken.

Does anyone understand?

OP posts:

sunflowersandbuttercups · 22/02/2021 14:29

You're doing the right thing

I know it's awful but your dog won't know what's going to happen. There are worse fates for a dog than going to sleep in the presence of their family and not waking up again.

I am so sorry for what you're going through.

LuckyLuckyWoman · 22/02/2021 14:30

I have had to say goodbye to my boy, different circumstances, but the end result is the same:(

You must be truly devastated, but try and cling on to knowing you are doing the right thing, however hard it seems.

LeaveMyDamnJam · 22/02/2021 14:38

I’m so sorry for you. You have done everything you can but your heart must be breaking. Poor you and poor dog.

Boboparadise · 22/02/2021 14:46

So sorry to hear this but you are doing the right thing for you and the dog. I can't even imagine how difficult this is...and the vet wouldn't be suggesting it if it wasn't necessary. I am sure you have given your dog lots of lovely memories and good times.

LittleBoPeep95 · 22/02/2021 14:51

Sending love to you OP

I hope you're OK

PollyRoulson · 22/02/2021 15:14

Op it is a heartbreaking position you find yourself in. Go to Losing Lula facebook page where you will get support and no judgement.

NoProblem123 · 22/02/2021 17:23

You are doing the right thing but I really feel for you

tabulahrasa · 22/02/2021 18:13

My last dog was dog and stranger aggressive - always kicked off at the vet (of which there were many many visits) and was muzzled whenever we left the house and would redirect to me in certain situations.

If I’d ever got to the point where I could no longer cope with him or be sure that he wasn’t putting anyone in danger I’d have had him PTS. As in, there were hard lines that I’d discussed and a plan for it all, not just a theoretical vague discussion.

When you’ve got a dog with complex behavioural problems IMO trying to do anything else at that point is actually really selfish.

I would add though - I muzzle trained him at home and he arrived at the vets already muzzled, it’s just easier.

noeffingwayyyy · 22/02/2021 18:25

I understand OP. We have a very anxious dog who is dog and stranger reactive, and there are so many things we don't / can't do as a result as even with behaviourists, training, classes etc there are a lot of situations she can't cope with so we just have to try to manage her, or ultimately avoid the triggers. She has a mostly happy life though as long as we stay within her comfort zone and keep the scary things away, but I've always said if it got to the point where her life was unenjoyable for her because of her issues, I'd let her go.

You're absolutely doing the right thing, it must be unimaginably hard to make the decision though

GrumpyMiddleAgedWoman · 22/02/2021 20:14

I've lived with a mildly reactive dog and that was stressful enough. It must be incredibly hard to be in your shoes.

Original poster

RoseyOldCrow · 22/02/2021 21:16

Wow. Thank you so much for your understanding & kind comments.

I can really identify with some of your experiences, our boy is definitely "stranger reactive" when at home, rarely when on a walk - although not at all bothered by other dogs.
It's been a pretty awful day; DH is just about managing although is a little moody, understandably.
We told the DCs (teens) they are sad but remarkably understanding really.
I'm still pretty devastated, currently working my way through all of the "what ifs" I can possibly imagine.
I still know that what we are doing is right, but it doesn't make it less painful.

Thank you, again.

OP posts:

tsmainsqueeze · 22/02/2021 21:40

Hi i understand and i am very sorry for your situation .
I'm a vet nurse and i visualised the description of your experience, this is no life for your dog or you and your family.
On here you will always get someone who will heap guilt on you for making this choice , most of them wouldn't know what you are going through .
I could /would not tolerate aggression i see the odd intolerable situation in my work , you know you have tried everything for your dog ,there are some problems that just can't be fixed .
Your poor dog must be so stressed i think, and i bet your vet agrees , that you are giving him a painless escape to his worries.

Snowymcsnowsony · 22/02/2021 22:08

We managed our ddogs 'bad' behaviour for 10 years.
3 episodes of heightened aggressive behaviour prompted us to make the appointment.. In fairness vet did suggest it was most likely a brain tumour - treatment wasn't an option for us. She had beaten cancer the year before. Our ddogs had become afraid of her as 2 were the victims of her aggression.. 1 small ddog being lucky to escape unscathed.
The anniversary is this week. No easier op.. Guilt. Guilt. And more guilt..
Sorry you also find yourself in this situation...

Sprig1 · 22/02/2021 22:14

How awful for you. He sounds like a very unhappy dog. This will be a release for him. You are doing the kindest thing.

Original poster

RoseyOldCrow · 28/02/2021 20:51

Wll it's nearly time - we've done our best to give him as great a week as possible. Favourite walks, favourite foods, even a couple of new squeaky that I found hidden away.
The plan tomorrow is to take him for a walk tomorrow morning & sedate him at home, as he finds the Vet visit so stressful in the base case.
Obviously I've got his absolute favourite snacks too.
DH & I will take him in after the DCs have said their goodbyes during the morning.

I'd really appreciate any hints or tips to make this sad day go as well as possible. Thanks.

OP posts:

Snowymcsnowsony · 28/02/2021 21:10

Sorry it's nearly time op... We had our first anniversary last week. Still so gutted.. Feelings of guilt will hit op. But then remember better a day too early than a day late. Especially when dealing with aggressive behaviour.. We were lucky, our ddog attacked 2 of our ddogs. Could have lost more than one ddog.. We took photos the last few days. Still hard to look at. Ours had pancakes before she went... It was Pancake Day. We had music playing as she liked us dancing daft.. She was also sedated first but at the surgery. She knew nothing after it took affect.. Putting the actual final meds in was stress free for her-. Not sure Covid rules but hopefully you will get some alone time afterwards...
You are absolutely doing the right thing. Remember your ddog won't know.

balzamico · 28/02/2021 21:24

I so feel for you and the week you've had plus the night ahead.
You are doing the right thing for your dog above all as well as for your safety.
Whatever the reason is, when it is time to pts is the hardest part of owning an animal and there are I believe many owners who keep their pets for too long.
Take his blanket with you if he has one and just remember that you did your best by him which includes what must be done tomorrow
Xxx

NoProblem123 · 28/02/2021 21:36

I would advise lots of cuddles & kisses and concentrate on getting through the day and the reason why you are doing what you’re doing, but most of all remember your dog hasn’t got a clue what’s going on - he’s just living in the moment and is aok.

I couldn’t do any big goodbye or eye contact, just hold him close, tell him how much you love him and everything is good.

I took mine in a big cushion doughnut thing so I could easily carry her, both in & out of the vets.

If you are taking him to a crematorium and his collar is important then take it off so they don’t lose it.

After the week you’ve had don’t be surprised if once you have done it you may feel instantly better/relived.
Also, you may not, so just go with how you feel.

I have immense sympathy for you tonight & will be thinking of you tomorrow

Snowymcsnowsony · 01/03/2021 09:35

Thinking of you today op..

Original poster

RoseyOldCrow · 01/03/2021 14:30

He's gone, it was very peaceful. He is no longer in pain, nor is he anxious or scared.

We feel an immediate & huge sense of loss, a deep sadness, but at the same time a developing sense that a weight has been removed, one that we were sharing with him.

Thank you for listening & supporting me through these few days.

OP posts:

Diddumz · 01/03/2021 14:33

So sorry...

My parents had to make the same decision for the same reason and it was very sad but the right thing to do.

Earlybirdcatches · 01/03/2021 14:40

you’ve done the right thing op. Sorry for your loss.

shouldistop · 01/03/2021 15:15

I'm so sorry op, you've done the right thing though.

Hettyhopper · 01/03/2021 15:21

Oh OP, sending you all lots of love

NoProblem123 · 01/03/2021 17:00

You were very brave and put the dog first so in time you will look back and be proud of today.
Hard at the moment though I’m sure

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