Puppy - at breaking point

[CrapDogOwner]

Possibly beyond.

Pup is 11 weeks. He is lovely - friendly, responds well to training.

I on the other hand am at the end of my tether. So sleep deprived I have spots before my eyes and I'm having dizzy turns. Spent first 10 days on floor near puppy, gradually moving further away. Thought I'd cracked it with 3 days in my own bed, but tonight he howled the house down.

So I'm on the sofa, fucking freezing, lying here thinking "this room now reeks of dog piss."

Because if he does go outside, I swear it's by accident. I spend half my life in the fucking garden with him. He has cast iron bladder and sphincter control - so long as he's outside. Come back inside - he immediately pisses and craps on the carpet.

My life is just a sheer hell of piss, crap and sleep deprivation and it's making me ill.

if it's any consolation, we are on 19 weeks tomorrow and still get wee accidents inside (mainly when he feels he will be missing out if he goes outside to wee!). I can tell he knows full well he should be doing them outside!

sleep deprivation is horrible - sounds like you've nearly cracked it and it was more to do with the one night where he got a bit more fun at night than the normal, you poor thing!

What age did he get it completely QuentinWinters? Weve only just started training with pup, going ok so far, but can't wait till its all done and dusted!!

as you can see from this thread there is a lot of opinion on how to bring up a puppy and also a lot of rubbish advice!

To save yourself anymore heartache conact an IMDT trainer who will give you advice correct for your situation and your dog. It will save you hours of trauma and stress and get you on the right track quickly. The trainers are happy to give zoom advice. It will be worth it.

Think about 16 weeks?

Veterinari - glad to say our dog came from a reputable breeder, both parents health checked, puppies really well socialised within the family before they left. Behaviour wise he's a dream most of the time - already have him happy to sit to get cuddles rather than jumping up, will sit while his food gets put down.

I never suggested he hadn't I just gave you constructive advice on toilet training, which is what you asked for. Not sure why so defensive 🤷‍♀️

Can I just clarify - the puppy will be 8 weeks tomorrow. I’ve read so many articles about it being okay to have the puppy at 7/8 weeks.

Why make such a big issue out of it?

@Hellin301 we got our pup at six weeks as he’d been dumped, alone. Maternal separation had already happened so not much choice, it was either sit in a crate alone at the shelter or come home with us.

He grew into a lovely boy, gentle and affectionate and placid. It’s not all doom and gloom, despite what some on these boards are keen to tell you!

@Hellin301

Can I just clarify - the puppy will be 8 weeks tomorrow. I’ve read so many articles about it being okay to have the puppy at 7/8 weeks.

Why make such a big issue out of it?

Because recommendations are that puppies should be rehomed at 8-9 weeks

Behavioural outcomes in puppies rehomed at 5-6 weeks are significantly worse than those rehomed at 8-9 weeks

veterinaryrecord.bmj.com/content/169/18/468.abstract#aff-2

It's also a sign of responsible breeding

www.thekennelclub.org.uk/about-us/about-the-kennel-club/the-kennel-club-codes/the-kennel-club-assured-breeders-standard/

Breeders that are choosing to rehome at 6-7 weeks are much less likely to be aware of puppy development, proper socialisation or the potential lifelong impacts of their decisions, otherwise they'd be making better choices.

Also for all those defending early sale of puppies - it's worth noting that it's actually illegal before 8 weeks of age.

So sure - feel free to defend irresponsible and illegal breeding and rehoming practices if it makes you feel better, but science and the law doesn't agree with you

puppycontract.org.uk/puppy-buyer/puppy-breeding-laws

I agree with @Veterinari and I personally would not buy a puppy from someone who thought it acceptable to try and palm them off earlier than 8 weeks. The longer they are with mum and siblings the better.

These threads always turn into a bun fight these days.

How much does he sleep in the day? Too much or too little could be an issue. More likely too little - at 11 weeks he should be awake for an hour or so and then back in crate for a nap. Repeat over the course of the day and by the time bedtime has come he's ready to settle properly.
Lots of outside time if possible - daylight good for circadian rhythm. I feed my puppy outside when not raining.
Make sure he's not too cold - presume he has a nice comfy bed in the crate? Also cover it with a towel or something to make it cosy.

@Seychelles98

Our kids would love to get a puppy but in all honesty I don't know how it would work with toilet training! It sounds like a lot of time needs to be devoted to that part and also I've heard that dogs get more lonely and need company more than cats do. Between school and full time work they'd be on their own most of the day which seems unfair but at the same time it would be nice to have a dog.

Do people really go out all day and leave the dog on their own?

I use daycare so my dog is only left for a few hours at a time.

Some people have a dog walker come in but for a few pounds more daycare is a better option for my dog.

And obviously some people leave them alone all day.

He's getting plenty naps - hour on, hour off is about right. Though I've noticed he's already more alert and seemingly needing less sleep than when he first arrived. I think we're also both going a bit stir crazy stuck inside (though I do take him out for a "walk" in a sling every day to get him used to traffic noises and other sights, sounds and smells. He'll be allowed down on the ground next week. I'm thinking quiet walks to start with and maybe a couple of short, quiet doggy play dates with friends with very calm, unreactive dogs.

A dog trainer does sound like a good investment.

@CrapDogOwner

He's getting plenty naps - hour on, hour off is about right. Though I've noticed he's already more alert and seemingly needing less sleep than when he first arrived. I think we're also both going a bit stir crazy stuck inside (though I do take him out for a "walk" in a sling every day to get him used to traffic noises and other sights, sounds and smells. He'll be allowed down on the ground next week. I'm thinking quiet walks to start with and maybe a couple of short, quiet doggy play dates with friends with very calm, unreactive dogs.

A dog trainer does sound like a good investment.

That all sounds good OP

What breed is he? Some toy breeds are notoriously tricky to toilet train and he's pretty young still so if you can give more info that would help

@CrapDogOwner Congratulations on getting your puppy!

Where is your crate? Ours is in the kitchen and our puppy HATED being in it. He'd cry and howl and it was just horrendous

On the first night, we let him have free roam of the kitchen and thats how he slept for 10 weeks. On the first night, he cried for 10-15 minutes but slept right through after that and every night since has been a dream! However, his chewing became really bad (as expected) so we tried him in his crate overnight and that's where he's happily slept since!

I can promise you things WILL get better. Do you have a good relationship with your neighbours? If you do, I'd recommend going round and explaining the situation and warning them about the puppy crying. Both of ours were so understanding which we were thankful for.

For bed time, I'd settle him in his crate with one of his favourite toys. Use this specifically as his bed time toy and hopefully, he'll get used to that being in his routine. Once he's inside, I'd sit in the room with him and have a cuppa or something and he'll hopefully relax a lot more knowing you're there and will hopefully sleep

Hopefully this makes sense x

Try giving pup a hot water bottle and a tucking clock. I rem wrapping an old fashioned ticking alarm clock up in a blanket for our dog when we first got her. She was used to sleeping with her mum and her litter mates, so we were advised to replicate that with the hot water bottle and alarm clock.

As for toilet training, get some puppy pads, spread them everywhere she’s liable to wee. Put her outside after every meal. Once she goes on a puppy pad, praise her. It’s hard work but you’ll get there.

Yes I'd also recommend a 1-1 dog training session. We. Pulsar make puppy classes so we had a recommended positive trainer to the house instead (2 years ago) and it was so so helpful as they see your situation.
I also had her back every 6 months or so until he was about 18 months. Worked on taking him out etc.

I brought my puppy home at 12 weeks and he never cried at night, at all. I do think that was because he was slightly older when he left his litter. Still had the usual toilet training etc though.

Are you on Facebook? If so join the group Puppy Training, Help & Advice Uk , it was a life saver for me and such a great support. You're going through the normal feelings of someone with a 10 week old puppy! Hang in there, it will get better.

@Veterinari my pup was born at RSPCA, we were given him at 7 weeks 2 days. They said by 6 weeks he had weaned and then until 7 weeks they monitored to ensure ok without mum, they were happy and contacted us to collect him. I trust they know what they're talking about there!

Obviously it's too late for this now but with both our puppies we put them in the crate from the get go and they learnt it fairly quickly, sadly puppy depression\regret is a real thing and it's so hard but it does get better and that's what you need to concentrate on, there's some puppy survival threads on MN which should help x

[quote zoomiecraziness]@Veterinari my pup was born at RSPCA, we were given him at 7 weeks 2 days. They said by 6 weeks he had weaned and then until 7 weeks they monitored to ensure ok without mum, they were happy and contacted us to collect him. I trust they know what they're talking about there! [/quote]
@zoomiecraziness

Yes shelters will often rehome early, that's because it's almost impossible to provide adequate socialisation in a shelter environment where people are only around 9-5, and are busy. Puppies in shelters have no opportunity to be socialised to normal home experiences that can be potentially stressful triggers e.g. TV, hoover, different flooring, children etc.

That doesn't make rehoming at

I just wanted to try give a message of hope that it does get better even though it feels like it’s endless now it really will work out eventually.
Our puppy is 5 months now and so many times I thought we’d made a huge mistake and have to rehome him in the beginning. We keep his crate in the bedroom with a hot water bottle and a t shirt with my smell on and cover the crate with a blanket. He’ll sleep through now from around 10-7/8. I’ll take him out to the toilet then he’ll happily come into bed with us for another hour or so to snooze.
He rarely has accidents now and if he does it’s generally our fault for not noticing he needs to go out.
Once you can take them for walks to tire them out it becomes a lot easier as well. Also make sure you have tonnes of chew toys for them, things like spilt antlers and yak chews are really good. Finally our dog seems to be out of the biting stage now he’s got his adult teeth through!

When I got mine he slept in a bed next to my bed.
Why are you out in the garden with him all the time? Can you not pop him out himself?