Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

Original poster

9 week old puppy hates being left alone when I do the school run

53 replies

FantasticMax · 10/12/2020 18:09

I have a 9 week old lab and struggling a bit. Puppy won’t sleep in his crate, only on the couch beside me or near me. I’ve been sleeping downstairs with him as I thought it would help him transition to being in a new house but as I said, he wants to sleep on me. But I can’t do that forever. I miss my bed! If I move him to his bed once he’s fallen asleep, he’ll simply wake up and crawl out to be with me. He tolerates the crate being locked for a few minutes and then starts to whine/bark.

The problem is I need to leave the house a few times a day to do the school run, which takes about 30 minutes. If I take him in the car, he whines and barks and tries to get beside me. He has toys, treats etc but they only keep him occupied for a few minutes and the barking starts.

If I leave him in the crate (with treats, stuffed Kong, etc), where I know he’s safe and not chewing up my furniture, he’ll start barking. I can’t say for certain he’s barking the whole time I’m away but I’d guess so given he also barks in the 5 minutes I disappear to shower.

So what’s the lesser of two evils? Do I keep taking him in the car and hope that he calms down with time. Or do I continue to leave him in the crate for the school run and hope he gets used to it. I know there is crate training but obviously that takes time and the school run needs to happen.

Any advice would be much appreciated. I’m concerned about pup developing separation anxiety and I’m really trying my best to get this right.

OP posts:
Snackasaurus · 10/12/2020 18:20

Where is his crate? If it's in the kitchen, could you shut the room off with a baby gate?

Imissmoominmama · 10/12/2020 18:23

Could you put a blanket over the crate, so he’s not seeing you walk away from it?

Original poster
FantasticMax · 10/12/2020 18:27

The crate is in the living room at the moment, which is where we spend most of our time.

OP posts:
Original poster
FantasticMax · 10/12/2020 18:28

I could try the blanket. So over the whole thing, including the door?

OP posts:
QueenOfLabradors · 10/12/2020 18:31

You'll need to get a car crate for him, and you might as well get the size he'll need when he's adult now. Having an unrestrained dog in a vehicle could lead to a fine of up to £5000, quite apart from the fact that as you've already noticed it's a PITA. There are also harnesses and doggy seatbelt extensions available that fulfil the legal requirement, but a crate is best as it will help keep the mud that is obligatory with Labradors away from the passenger area Smile There are various designs and price ranges available. I got mine a few years ago now from a firm who did eight different sizes and shaped to suit most makes and models that dog owners are likely to have. It fitted neatly into the space behind the rear seats of my mid sized MPV and had a sliding door, so opening the boot to get something else out didn't result in a dog hurtling off into the road. It was big enough for two Labradors or three spaniels to travel in comfort, and cost about £50 plus delivery.

swimster01 · 10/12/2020 18:33

I think young puppies are like babies - you know, the whole controlled crying thing?

I think you just have to be strong and try not to give into him too much. Instill the habits now, you're just making a rod for your own back.

if you need a bit of support, it might be worth getting a reputable dog trainer round. We did that with ours and it was £65 very well spent.

QueenOfLabradors · 10/12/2020 18:37

With the car journeys, he needs to start associating them with FUN!!! as soon as possible. Putting on my professional dog walker hat, we have several clients who are distinctly wary about getting in the car with their own family, as it's quite likely to be a long boring journey or worse still a trip to the vet, but are perfectly happy to hurl themselves into our Doggy Funbus (I swapped the MPV for a van the moment I no longer needed to have room for children on school runs) as we always go straight up to the woods for an hour's running around. Maybe try and do something fun at the end of each journey, or a quick walk if it's safe vaccination wise?

lulahloo · 10/12/2020 18:40

Yes, you need to leave him in the crate. Pop him in, give him a little pat on the head, and leave. You have reinforced the behaviour because when he has cried, you have responded (come to him).
Start off putting him in for a few minutes at a time, several times a day when you are there and returning so he doesn’t associate the crate with being left for ages. Try to return when there is a pause in his noise so he doesn’t associate his noise with you returning. Dogs learn by association. I highly recommend a book called “gun dogs and their learning chain”. It’s about training gun dogs but it will help you with the basics of training a puppy, and help you understand how they learn, and how you need to behave too. 😊

Original poster
FantasticMax · 10/12/2020 18:47

He’s not unrestrained in the car. That could be a disaster! He has a little seat on the backseat of the car which he’s clipped onto. Unfortunately the length of the straps means he tries to jump out towards me. It’s not very practical so I need something different.

I think you’re right about just leaving him in the crate anyway. I have ignored the barking and whining and only let him out while he’s calm. As soon as he sees me in the room again he stops. Most of the time!

OP posts:
BiscuitDrama · 10/12/2020 18:49

Aw. How long have you been trying for?

SimonJT · 10/12/2020 18:50

Do you just put him in the car when you’re going on the school run, or have you spent time training him to like the car?

FreshFreesias · 10/12/2020 18:52

Get another dog so that he has company. I have 2 dogs now and 2 is easier than 1 as they give each other companionship when I’m out.

Imissmoominmama · 10/12/2020 19:09

Yes, blanket over the whole crate, so it’s like bedtime. It worked for our pup. Good luck!

Original poster
FantasticMax · 10/12/2020 19:13

I’ve spent time with him in the car, feeding him treats, without going anywhere. He’s better when the children are there actually because they comfort him. But they are only there for one half of the journey. Today’s return journey was the best one yet, but as I say my daughter was comforting him at the time.

OP posts:
IToldYouIWantedTheUnicorn · 10/12/2020 19:15

Our pup liked having CBeebies in when we were out and she was in her crate

JazzTheDog · 10/12/2020 19:19

Our puppy is 10 weeks now. The first night he cried in the crate for about 10 minutes on and off (it's in our room). After a couple of nights it was less than 5 minutes. After a week I put a blanket over the 3 sides and he doesn't cry at all now.

In the car he cries in the crate for the first part of any journey but he's getting used to going on a variety of trips.

kennythekangaroo · 10/12/2020 19:21

You can get an iPad app that links to your phone so you can check up on him and see if he is barking for very long.

Original poster
FantasticMax · 10/12/2020 19:25

Oh god I don’t think I could cope with two dogs! Already feeling overwhelmed with just the one.

OP posts:
bloodywhitecat · 10/12/2020 19:27

It's probably completely the wrong thing to do but I used to take our pup with me when he was that age, I didn't start leaving him until he was much older. I think it is a big ask to leave a young dog, I think it is like leaving a small baby. Once our pup was older I slowly started leaving for longer and longer periods, initially in his crate but now he is 15 months and I can leave him for 2-3 hours un-crated and he is as good as gold.

Windinmyhair · 10/12/2020 19:29

I’ve got a 4.5 month old springer x lab. My advice? They need to be car and crate trained, so do a bit of both.

Take puppy on car runs a lot, crate in back. The whining is horrendous to start with. Ignore it. It gets better if you stick with it. Mine jumps into the car now. My child was primed to throw treats into the crate in the boot regularly to start with, or I left a few in her crate. I left a chew toy in there as well.

Also, you might find that puppy whines when you are in the shower because he can hear you. When you are gone he can’t hear you. Set up a device to record once just so you can tell (phone or tablet or something) But also, leave him in the crate more when you are popping into and out of the room, so he can learn you come back? Come back in a room, let him out, loads of fuss.

These days are hard. Keep going!

Wicker382 · 10/12/2020 19:49

As soon as they start to associate the car with walks he whining stops (that was our experience anyway).

I'd leave him in the crate and set your phone up to film him while you're gone. See what he gets up to. Our pup liked a puppy pen with his bed at one end and toys, water etc at the other.

Original poster
FantasticMax · 10/12/2020 20:02

Thanks all. Some good things to try. He’s a good pup, toilet training is going well (mostly!) and he is eager to learn - taught him sit and down commands so far. But I do struggle with the whining and barking. Sounds like crate for car and persevere. I’d be happier to let him have a freer roam of the kitchen for example but he’s such a chewer, I fear for my table legs and kitchen units!

I think I’ll wait till the weekend to do some tough love training with the house crate as the barking/whining will wake the kids and don’t want them tired at school. But tomorrow I can definitely try with some day crating for smaller intervals.

OP posts:
paiop · 10/12/2020 20:22

Buy the happy puppy handbook. Pippa Mattinson who wrote it also has a super helpful website called the labrador site. You have to be firm. Labradors want to please, they are one of the easiest breeds to train. But they can also learn that you are a pushover!
https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/0091957265/ref=tmmpapptitle0?ie=UTF8&qid=1607631651&sr=8-6

newpup123 · 10/12/2020 22:08

Have a look for crate games on YouTube to get advice on how to make it a fun safe place to be.

Also AbsoluteDogs have a range of games and ideas about boundary training and puppy training in general. Follow them on Facebook for a taste of their style.

Funf · 11/12/2020 05:43

Back to basic crate training play time, feeding time quiet time etc. Personally I wouldn't get another as we did it and the two never bothered with eachother.
You must crate him in the car or seat belt as its an accident waiting to happen