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I just need to tell you about Jack *Content warning MNHQ*

29 replies

RememberingJack · 24/08/2020 23:13

I met Jack before he was born. A friend was pregnant and, while we were chatting, we looked over at her dog and realised she was also pregnant. He was born on 25th August 2007.

Captain Jack Puppomatic (soon shortened to Jack!) came to live with me 10 weeks after he was born. He was beautiful - a little ball of fluff with a little pointy collie nose. He toilet trained himself, loved everyone and everyone loved him.

Over the next 13 years he took everything in his laid-back style - new puppies, house moves, many visitors, cats, horses, goats and chickens. He was once caught with a chicken in his mouth but I swear he was putting it back in the coop.

Earlier this year we realised his hips were troubling him and he was on medication for a heart murmur but his eyes were bright and a thrown ball took away any pain, at least for a while.

6 weeks ago Jack jumped into the back seat of our truck for a ride back from the stables. My partner opened the rear door for Jack to get out, then I asked him for a drill so he drove to to the yard, picked up the drill and came back to the house, closing up the truck.

About 4 hours later I wanted to put the dogs - we had 7 - into the shade for the afternoon as the temperate was pushing 40c but I couldn't find Jack. Then I looked into the truck. He was stretched out on the floor and looked asleep. He wasn't. I can't get that sight out of my head. My beautiful, soft, fluffy, loving, gentle Jack was dead.

My partner made a simple mistake, a tiny mistake, one we all make every day. He was distracted for an instant but in that instant he killed Jack. He was so, so distraught I couldn't - and can't - bring myself to blame him. We buried him in the garden that evening and we've planted so many flowers - roses - on his grave. It's beautiful. But I miss my boy so much and I'm not coping.

Every time I close my eyes I see his body - that split second of realising that he's been in a hot car for hours and he's dead.

I can't tell anyone IRL what happened, everyone thinks it's 'natural causes'. I want to hate my partner but I can't. It was a tragic accident and my best buddy died.

I don't really know why I'm posting this. I just need to put it into words.

OP posts:
Alexandernevermind · 24/08/2020 23:19

That's so sad. You are right of course, accidents like this are no one's fault. Try to focus on the good times with Jack. By posting you are raising awareness that we should check and double check the whereabouts of our dogs, particularly in hot weather, so thank you. X

RememberingJack · 24/08/2020 23:24

Jack

I just need to tell you about Jack *Content warning MNHQ*
OP posts:
Alexandernevermind · 24/08/2020 23:28

Sweet dog. Allow yourself to grieve properly in whatever way feels right for you. You have lost a really important member of your family. Flowers

stayathomegardener · 24/08/2020 23:34

I'm so,so sorry.

It was a tragic accident, please don't blame yourself or your partner.

I totally understand you replaying the what ifs and I would consider counselling to overcome these intrusive thoughts and remember the gorgeous Jack in happy times.

If it helps I can be quite judgmental and I pass no judgement on either of you. Thanks

bloodywhitecat · 24/08/2020 23:34

What a beautiful tribute to a beautiful boy, I am so sorry for your loss.

StillMedusa · 25/08/2020 00:09

I'm so so so sorry for the loss of your boy. A tragic accident and I can only imagine how your partner must feel.
He was loved, and that's what matters most.
Be kind to yourself and each other xxx

AvocadosBeforeMortgages · 25/08/2020 01:49

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Roodog · 25/08/2020 08:19

So sorry for your loss. Sounds like you had a real bond with Jack.

OwlInAnOakTree · 25/08/2020 09:18

Beautiful boy. So sorry for your loss. Thanks

Comefromaway · 25/08/2020 09:21

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BeingATwatItsABingThing · 25/08/2020 09:32

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halfmoonbay · 25/08/2020 09:33

So so sorry for your loss. Jack looks like he was a wonderful boy, you gave him an amazing life and he knew he was loved. Don't beat yourself up - this is tragic and my heart goes out to you x

Giggorata · 25/08/2020 11:23

So sorry for your loss. Flowers

vanillandhoney · 25/08/2020 11:36

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vanillandhoney · 25/08/2020 11:36

I am sorry for your loss OP. Jack was a beautiful boy Flowers

Ludo19 · 25/08/2020 11:40

RIP Jack x

petalflowercherrybomb · 25/08/2020 11:40

I'm so so sorry. He's gorgeous. I'm sure you have so many happy memories and hope that in time you can remember those fondly. Please don't blame your partner. Mistakes happen however tragic.

Eyesofdisarray · 25/08/2020 11:42

Massive sympathies to you OP.
What a gorgeous dog- remember you had 13 beautiful years with him and he knew he was loved Flowers Flowers

Eyesofdisarray · 25/08/2020 11:43

Sorry OP- meant sympathies to your DP too

FiveShelties · 25/08/2020 11:45

I am so very sorry for you OP. He was a beauty and very well loved I am sure.

Fromadistance1 · 25/08/2020 11:49

He is lucky to have two people that love him as much as you and your partner do. Be as kind to yourself as Jack would be to you. ThanksThanksThanks

redpinkgreenyellowbluee · 25/08/2020 11:50

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villainousbroodmare · 25/08/2020 16:40

AvocadosBeforeMortgages
I hope that if you ever find yourself griefstricken and wracked with guilt, and reaching out for comfort, that you are treated with kindness and not with the pointless viciousness that you've produced today. Unforgettable.

OP, what a beautiful dog. All my sympathy to you and your partner.

MyBabyIsAFurBaby · 25/08/2020 16:59

Your post made me cry OP, it was so beautifully written and such a wonderful tribute to your lovely boy.

I am so sorry for what has happened to you. I wish I could give you a hug.

ArcherDog · 25/08/2020 17:03

Why was @AvocadosBeforeMortgages comment deleted? It hardly breaks talk guidelines, it’s insensitive (most of MN is) but factual.