Getting a dog advice

[crappyday2018]

I've been desperate to buy a dog for a long time now and hope to get one next year. I'm already trying to do as much research as possible so I'm prepared.
My working hours would mean I would be home by 3.30 (Mon-Wed), home by 6pm on a Thurs and my oldest would be home by 2.30pm on a Friday.
I intend to get a dog walker to come in around lunchtime every day (even on my short days).
Do you think getting a walker to do a 30 minute walk at lunchtime will be enough if I take it out in the morning and then straight after work too?
I'm looking to get a Labradoodle.

An interesting article about Wally Conron... www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/canine-corner/201404/designer-dog-maker-regrets-his-creation

Thanks. Will have a read.
Just wish somebody (won’t be KC) would sort the BYB from the puppy farmers from the decent breeders who don’t do it for the cash.

Honestly Wolfiefan you are not obliged to make a comment if you don’t know anything about a topic! The guy bred and trained guide dogs. He had a specific request from a person whose husband was allergic to dog. He tried numerous poodles, none made the grade as guide dogs. He then thought the solution would be to breed the temperament of the Labrador to the coat of the poodle. Didn’t work for the client, and caused this ridiculous situation with designer mongrels.

Unfortunately I know far too much about poodle crosses, puppy farms and the idiots who get sucked in by the hypoallergenic bollocks.

Honestly? I wouldn't go for a basset. We have a beagle and he's hard work though much, much better now he's one.

Hounds are pack dogs and really don't enjoy being left alone. They need company, be that of other dogs or people - they don't like being alone. And like @Floralnomad said, they howl and bay and it's incredibly noisy.

Bassets are also prone to back, joint and skin problems because, despite appearances they're large, heavy dogs that only have small legs!

Just wanted to put my thoughts in. Heres what we do;
DH and DS work full time mon- fri but both home 4.30
I work 3 days a week 12.30-8pm
So the only time pup is alone is 4 hours x 3 days a week. My mum comes in on those days and sits for 1-2 hours.

sometimes it's not 3 days if I work a weekend as DH home then.

When I go shopping he will happily stay in utility room with a kong (I have a doggy cam)
The breeder has offered to have him back if we go on holiday or long days out.
It's all working well so far! He's so adorable.
He's scared of the cat, just looks the other way when it walks by

Also, the suggestion I would be 'dragging' children out of bed in horrible weather is a bit over the top. People are quick to judge when kids don't get outside to exercise and play but apparently we also can't expect them to go out for walks with a dog now either

Why do you think it’s ‘over the top’?

You are the one scheduling a 45min-1hr walk every morning, as a single parent. Rare is the 6 yo that wants to get up an hour earlier, in the middle of winter, to walk the dog for an hour, especially if their sibling is allowed to stay in bed.

After school, weekends, not always the fun family outing you have in your mind, but yes, it won’t hurt them to do it. But don’t expect them to do it happily. For most kids walking the dog twice a day, day in - day out is boring but as a single parent you have to make them (at least the youngest) go with you, they don’t have the option of staying home with the other parent. Unless you intend to leave the 6/7 yo with the 11/12 yo?

Being ‘tied’ with children is very different than being ‘tied’ with a dog and given you can’t see that, I think you need to listen to the advice you’re being given. You can take your children to a lot more places than your dog. Your children go to their Dad’s, the dog will not. Your children are being looked after all day by others, the dog will not be. Every time you plan a day out with the kids it will need to be dog friendly, either something the kids can do without you once you’re there or something the dog can do - that rules out a lot of things as a single parent.

Just because some people leave them all day doesn’t mean it’s good for them. One dog walk in the middle of the day doesn’t make up for hours alone, especially for a young dog.

It is massively unkind to leave a puppy alone for hours on end, no matter how many people at work have done it ‘successfully’.

Very well put IncrediblySadToo but I suspect it's falling on deaf ears.

You could go ahead with your plan. It may work out or it may not. What will you do if it doesn't work out, if your dog gets separation anxiety/is destructive?

OP, @IncrediblySadToo's point really helps point out some useful research you could do over the next year, while you work out if you are going to get a dog or not.

A year is a great time to:

• consider each day what you would (have to) do differently if you had a dog. For example, if you are invited to a wedding later in the year, think about what you would do with a dog for the day. If you want to take the children to a theme park, think about where the dog would go. If you are at the children's park, think about what you would be doing - especially considering dogs are often not allowed in children's areas so would you not go, go but stand away from the children with the dog, leave the dog at home? Holidays. Staying with family. Having family stay with you. Going out for meals. etc etc. A year would be brilliant for really thinking about how a dog might change your life and reflecting on whether or not you are up for that.

• consider what it would be like to walk every day, even in the dark and cold. I stress this point often because I think it can be easy to imagine all the sun-filled, wild meadows and cool breeze in your hair type walks, with your faithful and steady companion dog by your side. That is the dream. But as a dog owner, you only really get those kinds of walks every now and again (and treasure them when they happen ). Mostly what you get is the dragging your butt out of bed when all you want to do is snooze, wrapping up to go out in the wind and the rain and the dark, kind of walks. Muddy walks where you have to change when you get back. Rinsing your wellies off for the umpteenth time kind of walks. You've been up all night throwing up but still need to drag yourself out walks. With a young dog, you also get the added 'fun' of the walk being more about training the dog than enjoying it for yourself. In your case, maybe imagining what it might be like to teach a young, strong dog to walk nicely on the lead whilst also keeping an eye on the kids? If you don't naturally like those kinds of things then it does become a ball ache. Of course, put the effort in during the early years and the latter ones become much easier. You might even try waking the kids for an early morning walk a few times, in preparation?

• Reading up on what the puppy weeks, months and adolescent years are likely to entail. I wouldn't expect a labradoodle, or a lab, or a poodle to be fully adult mature until getting on for 2-3 years old. Pippa Mattinson's Happy Puppy Handbook is a great read for someone BEFORE they get a puppy. Pippa is especially knowledgeable about labradors so it is even more useful for those considering a lab or lab cross. It would not be a waste to buy a copy now and have a read.

That all sounds negative, but I think that's because most people can easily imagine all the positives of owning a dog - the snuggling on the sofa, the play times, the companionship etc. And there is plenty of that. It's the tough stuff that many people don't think about or don't know about. Starting to think about all aspects of dog ownership a year before getting one is brilliant, more so if you're able to be critically honest about what you want, what you can cope with and what you cannot.

OP you say kids are a tie but the dog is an even bigger tie.

You can't take the dog to a theme park, to the zoo or to the beach in the height of summer. Who's going to look after him then? A lot of daycares and walkers don't work weekends or charge a premium for those days. Kennels for day places get booked up months in advance - what's going to happen if you just fancy a day out? You'll either have to take the dog or arrange daycare (which needs to be done well in advance).

What if your kids have activities after school but the dog has already been alone all day? You'll need to take the dog and fit a walk in around that. What about if both kids are sick, you're sick and it's pissing with rain outside? The dog still needs a walk - while you can probably skip a walk with a much older dog, young dogs need to get out everyday else they get bored and destructive.

They're a huge tie and you still have a young child at home. Please consider how you'll fit walks in around it all - it's a lot of work and most children will get bored of being jumped at and bitten very quickly - and all puppies bite and it bloody hurts! They also won't be very keen on getting up early to walk the dog, no matter what the weather or how well or tired they are. The novelty of a dog (or any pet) for small children wears off very quickly!

Oh come on this is getting ridiculous now!

"What if you want to take your children to a theme park..." then she takes the children to the bloody theme park!!

Dog is walked before and after and maybe the dog walker pops in half way through the day.

So you can't leave a puppy a whole day while you go to a theme park...Maybe she leaves off the (suddenly vital apparently!) Visit to the theme park until the dog is older and can be left alone for longer.

And what is she doesn't get a dog with separation anxiety (which can be dealt with by the way, and doesn't have to last forever) and it all works out fine??!

But by all means keep posting to make sure she never does get a dog and misses out on all the happiness it could bring her and her children....better that than miss a day at the theme park.

Ffs

OP luckily you don't need the approval of people on this board before you get a dog...who knew?!

You have been given some very good advice about things to consider before getting a puppy - see battendogs post above

Also sorry battendog the theme park thing first appeared in your post then was picked up on again, and I realise you were just citing an example. I actually think you post a lot of sense and a very balanced view on these threads.

Nothing to do with that

Far, far too many dogs are dumped in rescues because people don't realise how much work they require when they're young.

Lots of family days out are not dog-friendly days out. It's something that needs to be considered. She has a five year old. Five year olds enjoy things like beaches, zoos, farm parks, soft play centres, amusement parks - none of those things are dog friendly. So OP does need to consider what she'll do with the dog on those days. A puppy can't be left all day - so someone needs to come in and sit with it, or look after it. Puppies need feeding 2-3 times a day, they need regular toilet breaks - you can't just stick them in a crate and leave them on their own while you carry on with your life.

People aren't being ridiculous - they're being realistic. There is currently another thread running in here about a lady with a teenage dog (I think around 13 months of age) who leaves it all day while she works and wonders why the dog is anxious and destructive and chews a lot. She's considering rehoming the dog because she didn't realise how much work it would be and is struggling to fit it all in.

I have a young dog and work full-time so I'm not against people working and owning dogs. But I also don't have a 5yo to worry about. I can go out at six am to walk the dog and I'm not having to drag a child out with me or find childcare for them. Likewise I can take the dog out last thing at night without having to worry about leaving a small child at home. I also have a partner who can take the dog out if I'm unwell or need to work late. I also live somewhere very dog-friendly and I can take my dog anywhere (except the supermarket). Most places aren't like that.

No offence taken @Notrusthere

fwiw, I think everyone on this thread does genuinely have the dog's best interests at heart and I cannot find in me to criticise anyone for that. I also suspect most - myself included - did a shed ton of research and STILL found the puppy months to be harder than we expected. As a result, whenever anyone comes along who might appear to be entering it willingly and a bit naively (as we were) it can be very hard not to react with a resounding "No!".

My own breeder spent as long quizzing me about emergency dog care as she did the normal day-to-day plans we had. She wanted to know what I would do if I was sick, in hospital, broke my leg, lost my job and so on. It was a depressing conversation, thinking about all the disasters that could befall me, but I think she was very sensible to do so.

Despite that, a happy, healthy, well adjusted and well cared for dog is a true delight to have in the family. They will bring with them far more than they will take away. The dogs I had as a child developed a lifelong love affair with the species and I still think about them in one way or another almost every day. Their very presence made any bad days 100x better and I would hope child-me also helped fill their lives with fun and activity.

I just would caution anyone to be clear on what it takes for a such a dog to exist.

Well said miss! I did years of prep and I have found the puppy stage to be really bloody hard. And adaline is right. Some days are really hard. This morning I had an appointment with eldest and needed to get youngest to school but somehow needed to fit in a walk long enough to tire anxious dog out so she wouldn’t chew her feet whilst we were out. I know she’s abnormally sensitive/difficult/neurotic and the OP could get a totally chilled dog. But it’s not daft to think what you would do if .....

somehow needed to fit in a walk long enough to tire anxious dog out so she wouldn’t chew her feet whilst we were out. I know she’s abnormally sensitive/difficult/neurotic and the OP could get a totally chilled dog. But it’s not daft to think what you would do if .....

Thing is Wolfie, even if OP's dog is chilled, ALL young dogs need a good walk before they're happy to be left for hours. All teenage dogs need a good walk in the morning - mine is currently sprawled next to me asleep but he was out for 90 minutes this morning and that included a trip to his favourite pet shop!

As an aside, I'm so pleased you've managed to get to the stage where you can leave yours though, I know you really struggled with her

I’ve had seven puppies since I left home many decades ago and seen hundreds, if not thousands, in training classes. Each one is different, you never know what you are going to get, but what almost all require is room in your life to fit one in. If your life is very full it is difficult to make the adjustments a puppy requires (or make them with good grace). Something has to give and, for most people, the priority is their children and their jobs, which is why so many adolescent dogs are always looking for new homes.

Yep me too! She was a baptism of fire though @adaline and I must admit our life revolves round her even more than I thought it would. Even our vet says she would have ended up being rehomed if she had gone to a household where everyone worked.
I didn’t leave her longer than a couple of hours this morning but still it required forethought.
Good job I bloody love that dog.

I am just grateful that I have a flexible job and big pockets to pay to outsource the care when I need to.

However, even with that the biggest problem I have come across when working is all the illnesses and accidents he's had when he had been unable to go to daycare or be walked. Basically we have been confined to the house with no exercise for several weeks at a time. No amount of research I did prepared me for that.

I am just grateful that I have a flexible job and big pockets to pay to outsource the care when I need to.

Same, and a flexible daycare who will accommodate the fact that I need to work different days each week!

I’ve had seven puppies since I left home many decades ago

Anyone else got the collywobbles about doing the puppy thing SEVEN times?

Hi OP! We have an almost 2 years old cockapoo (a mongrel, some would say ) and she is the best thing ever. Very hard work though, she follows me everywhere, all the time, which can be too much.
I'm also a dog-walker and most of my clients work full time. If, most of them have an hour run around midday, they are fine.

I wouldn't worry to much about the unhelpful comments. As you do now, after a research and lots of consideration, I would go for it.

Miss I’m lined up for another one next year and I’m having wobbles about just that. and may be the way forward. Can’t be as hard as madam. Can it?

You're brave wolfie

Also, how big must your car be to fit TWO wolfhounds??? I am totally looking forward to seeing the photos and hearing the stories...