What on earth to do with my dog??

[JoinTheMicrodots]

I have a deeply neurotic spaniel who has separation anxiety - whenever she’s left alone she barks/howls the entire time, raids bins/tables/anywhere she can smell the vaguest trace of something interesting (including vegetables, birdseed, live insects, tissues... 🤢) and pees upstairs. She is never, ever left for more than 4 hours, and usually less than this. In the last year or so I’ve started working part time, but my daughter is at home the majority of the time and so is here to keep her company (though she still displays anxiety and will raid and pee if DD is asleep/upstairs).

The big problem is that
A) my work is steadily ramping up and they want to employ me for more hours.
B) from June onwards, DD will not be anything like as available to dog sit.

I need to find a workable solution, but I’m wracking my brains to think of a solution I can see working.

Dog is an idiot on walks - she doesn’t like other dogs, rolls in disgusting things at every opportunity, whinges constantly unless you’re playing her favourite game, and is likely to run back to the car at any point but always towards the end of the walk. A dog walker walking her with other dogs absolutely would not work - she’d hate it. She’s also dreadful on the lead, natch. 🙄

She’s not hugely interested in people other than us, though she might settle with someone once she got to know them, and will whinge constantly if we leave her with someone. She would need to be with someone who is pretty hot on security - she’ll run out of a door, given the slightest opportunity, and would get out of an insecure garden to go looking for us.

All the dog walker/doggy day care solutions only seem possible if the dog is happy with other dogs, and ours isn’t.

I don’t want to turn down a great work opportunity because of the dog’s anxiety, but I’m struggling to know what to do - everything I think of, I immediately think of reasons why it wouldn’t work.

Thanks for the ideas.

I'm not wild about having someone in the house when I'm not here (understatement), but I'm making myself consider it as an option.

@Namechangeforthiscancershit I don't know anyone with an aupair - nobody I know could afford one, I don't think. That's a really good idea (if I could bear them being in the house) though, as would fit with school hours when they're probably free. Thank you!

@aidelmaidel your idea is particularly appealing as it gives the possibility of aural revenge on my very loud neighbours and their drummer son.

@crazycockerlady and @namechangedforanon thank you for the suggestions. I'm in the Hampshire/Surrey/West Sussex region.

Derby I'll have a look at that, thanks.
Villainous I'll talk to the vet again, and Bitey I'll give that some thought. Thanks.

@JoinTheMicrodots I'll pm you

I've seen/heard about lots of 'behaviourists' whose methods I vehemently disagree with. I would be willing to get a behaviourist in if I found one that I could trust, but I don't have any faith whatsoever that her behaviour would change significantly and permanently.

Which county do you live in? I'm sure I can find someone appropriately qualified in your area, who will only use positive reinforcement methods (not pack leadership tosh)

We had one session with a behaviourist (albeit for a different issue) and found it very helpful. You do have to put the work in after the visit, however!

Ours does an initial phone conversation where she takes history, doles out initial advice etc and charges £25, which is deducted from the cost of an in person visit. That would be a good point to have a conversation about how much improvement is realistic to hope for.

Depending on your pet insurance provider, you may find that a behaviourist is covered (eg PetPlan do cover it)

Sorry just spotted your location. You've got lots to choose from, luckily!

APBC and CCAB are the two gold standard qualifications for behaviourists. I'd be happy to use anyone on these lists
www.apbc.org.uk/need-help/
www.asab.org/ccab-register

Before you take on more hours, how about getting the dog used to being walked on a long lead? Not an extension lead. There are 20+ metre leads that are great. The dog can go and explore, but won't have the restrictions of a shorter lead. The dog won't even realise they have a lead attached (unless they try to run off!). The 1-2-1 dog walker is a great suggestion, but if not possible the very long lead could be a solution for a group dog walker. Could you perhaps provide the dog with some more mentally stimulating things to do In the house such as a snuffle mat, filled kong, etc? Just ideas as these things can be be settling and will re-focus the dog onto a meaningful activity they will enjoy and tire them mentally and something that doesn't involve tearing the house to bits (or your sanity)!

Regardless of what you do about the sep. anxiety, I would start to try and get her to be more comfortable apart from you.

Get a baby gate and put the dog one side, and you the other. Now sit there with a book. When she stops whining/pacing etc and settles down, reward her 'good girl' and throw a treat.
Stand up, sit down. Again, when she settles, reward her.
Try and sit a bit further away (but still in sight).
Each time, reward her calm settling behaviour, ignore any whining and barking etc
Do it for a little while, and after a few successful goes, let her back into the room and get on with normal routines etc.
Repeat this over and over until she is able to settle without being right next to you. Build up her confidence on being apart from you - but still able to see you.

Depending on the success, you can then try one of you leaving the room for a few seconds/minutes. Once she doesn't whine at that, you could move on to one leaving the room, then a few minuets later the pother leaving. But always returning shortly after.

Just slowly slowly build up her confidence. Can you sit up to table so that she is not able to lie on/next to you? So she has to settle elsewhere?
She should really be able to cope with one person leaving the car without having a panic attack.

You need to invest in the behavioural expert in order to make your dog able to go into regular dog daycare.
There is no day care that will work if things really are as you describe them. The behaviourist isn't to train the dog to stay home alone. It's to train the dog to cope with/ enjoy if possible- regular day kennels or care with other dogs.

Unfortunately your dog has one of the most difficult behavioural problems. Sadly, training alone does not help all dogs.

Fluoxetine (Prozac) is worth a try, talk to your vet about it. It doesn’t help all dogs but it can work for some.

Another possible solution would be to find someone who could stay with your dog through Borrow my Doggie, provided your dog could adjust to a new person.

Do you have a local Facebook page or even a local magazine you could advertise in? I would bet there are quite a lot of retired people out there who have had dogs for years, have said farewell to their last dog but hesitate to take on a new 15 year commitment at their stage of life. Perhaps one of them would be happy to have a regular visiting dog. I know if I lived near you I'd be on your doorstep asking for an introduction to your ddog

Get chatting to other local dog owners. See if you can find one that has a dog yours can cope with that also needs a dog sitter for theirs. Then arrange reciprocal dog sitting.
One of my neighbours has a dog with issues, but that gets on with my dogs ok, and because I know how careful she is with her dog, I know she will go the extra mile for mine. It works brilliantly, I have hers when she's out and she has mine in return.