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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

Original poster

Jakeyboy

33 replies

Awks · 28/05/2013 15:30

This is for me to get down how I feel, which right now is shit. Jake died about an hour and a quarter ago and as an end it was about as perfect as possible. He went to sleep with his head on my knee as the vet injected his leg. He just drooped and then went still. The kids and dh said bye to him at home (awful, awful) and I took him to the vets who were lovely - kind and caring.

I miss him already, can't bear the thought of not having a dog, of not walking him every day and not chatting to him as I work (from home). I just want to go and buy another one, drive straight to dogs trust or somewhere and fill the lonely space.

Dh and kids are gutted too and I dont want to make their pain worse by spilling my guts all over so here is where it will all be.

I know it gets better and I know it's raw but it bastard hurts.

OP posts:
ChickensHaveNoEyebrows · 28/05/2013 15:33

I'm so sorry, Awks x

hellonewworld · 28/05/2013 15:34

It's an awful feeling isn't it Sad Take it easy and give yourself time to grieve, you've had him a long time, it must be such a shock. He was well loved and cared for and you gave him a long and happy life. Take care xx

moosemama · 28/05/2013 15:49

I'm so sorry Awks.

He was a luck boy to have had such a lovely, loving person to take care of him and most importantly one who was able to make the right decision for him when the time came. My heart goes out to you.

Do whatever feels right for you and your family. Some people need time and space to grieve, others need the distraction of a different (not replacement) dog in the home. There's no right or wrong about it, we're all different in how we deal with our grief and whatever you feel you need is right for you.

Original poster
Awks · 28/05/2013 15:50

It is awful. I loved him and the thought of never seeing him again is so painful.

OP posts:
frostyfingers · 28/05/2013 16:14

It is so hard, no matter how right you are to have put him to sleep. Allow yourself to grieve properly, to some people he may "only be a dog" but he has been a much loved family member - he loved you and you loved him.

AtYourCervix · 28/05/2013 16:18

So sorry.

Original poster
Awks · 28/05/2013 16:40

Anyone who says only a dog to me is liable to have their teeth smashed in (only slightly joking, there).

Thanks for everyone's kind words. It does help x

OP posts:
Frettchen · 28/05/2013 16:44

Oh, Awks, I'm so sorry to hear that. I was so relieved for you on your other thread when there was that glimmer of hope that his heart was ok, and I'm so sad to hear that it came to this so fast.

Much hand holding and unMNy hugs for you.

About getting another dog - give it a week, then sit down with the family at the weekend and decide what you want to do. I know what you mean though - I can't stop thinking that my house is going to be hideously empty when Dog goes, and I know I'll get another dog once the initial grief has subsided rather than pack all her stuff away. It won't replace Jakey, and it won't stop the pain, but it might make your family feel whole again.

Original poster
Awks · 28/05/2013 16:46

To you too Frettchen x x

OP posts:
frostyfingers · 28/05/2013 17:32

Sorry, Awks, I hope you didn't think I was implying that - there's no such thing as "only a dog/cat/horse" in this household either.

everythinghippie29 · 28/05/2013 17:33

Aww I'm so sorry. So sad. Sad. Thanks xxx

Original poster
Awks · 28/05/2013 17:48

frostyfingers course I didn't think that, anyone that posts on this board is automatically lovely in my book. Thanks hippie

OP posts:
topbannana · 28/05/2013 17:48

So sorry awks :(
I posted earlier on fretts thread and mentioned my old girl who went in January.
We had a dog left who pined terribly on his own, prompting us to bring forward our decision to get a puppy. 4 weeks ago we bought home our working cocker puppy, a different breed, sex and just about everything else to BlackDog. I felt it was too soon (in my own mind) but absolutely see now that it was the right thing for us.
I now don't feel it's a disloyalty to her, which was a big worry of mone, and I enjoy the life a young pup has bought to our home. If you truly feel adrift without a dog in your life (I definitely would) and you and your family can agree then look at taking on another. It will never replace your old boy but will replace the missing piece of your family xx

1MitchellMum · 28/05/2013 17:53

So so sorry. It may help to write down a list of memories - things he always did, things he did once and made you laugh. You may be surprised at just how long the list is. You will feel better in time but in my experience (four times now) it takes a very long time indeed. RIP, you were a much loved dog. x

Wolfiefan · 28/05/2013 17:59

If anyone says "only a dog" then let me at 'em! You have lost a family member. The house feels bloody empty without them. Poor you. Hugs to you and your whole family.

RedwingWinter · 28/05/2013 18:49

I'm so sorry, Awks. Sad

Leverette · 28/05/2013 18:53

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fengirl1 · 28/05/2013 19:16

Awks - my Jake was 'Jakeyboy' too. He loved having cuddles. There's a beautiful passage called Rainbow Bridge about pets passing away (it is guaranteed to make you cry though) which has a lovely ending. Your Jake is at peace now, in no pain, and had someone who loved him enough to know when it was time for him to go. Thinking of you and yours.

tanfastic · 28/05/2013 19:20

I'm so sorry to hear your news, it hurts so much doesn't it. As a dog owner I can imagine what you are going through, you love them so much don't you Hmm

toffeelolly · 28/05/2013 19:36

Awks, so sorry to hear about your little jake. We to had one who was alway's nicknamed jakeyboy, he passed away 3 years ago it was awful sad we had him almost 16 years he was a little westie, I know how you are feeling about people saying pull yourself together he was only a dog they do not understand. How old was he, what breed of dog was he ? Again so sorry. Take care.

Original poster
Awks · 28/05/2013 20:15

Hi all, thank you so much for your kind words and thoughts. It means a lot to me. I would look for another dog straight away but dh is very much saying never again as he's gutted too. That scares me as I work from home and Jake was company for me. Dh works long hours and Jake was my sort of hobby really - I walked him and cared for him and chatted to him and now I am going to be so lonely on my own all day. I sound so self pitying, I know but I won't say all that to dh as I don't want to burden him but I am absolutely dreading tomorrow - 8 hours at work on my own.

I like hearing about other Jake's and your dogs and experiences and suggestions for going forward and am grateful to you all for posting.

Toffee Jake was a field cocker and was nearly 13 - we'd had him from a puppy. He was much loved.

OP posts:
moosemama · 28/05/2013 20:31

We had a Jakeyboy too - lost him 11 years ago. He was a huge great almost 9 stone boxer x gsd and a really special boy, one of those dogs that grabs your heart and keeps it forever. Smile Sad

Give your dh some time, he'll probably come round when he's had time to grieve. I've said never again many a time over the years, but I could never stick to it. When we lost our first dog went I went a bit loopy and removed every trace of her from the house - right down to every last hair. I couldn't bear to be reminded. That was 20 years ago and this time, oldgirl's lead is still hanging in it's place, her favourite toy is on the lawn and her bed is there for lurcherboy to snuggle in. These days i find it comforting to have them around me and a month on they can even raise a smile when they bring back the memory of something daft she'd got up to. There are still plenty of tears, but the happy memories are starting to win out.

I was only saying earlier this year that when oldgirl went we wouldn't get another, but here I am planning for a rescue pup come September. Even with lurcherboy in the house things are too quiet around here these days and he is really missing having a canine friend to play with.

1MitchellMum · 28/05/2013 20:31

I hope the right dog will come along for you. When I've lost one I've been lucky always to have two left behind - I just couldn't bear it if I had no dog at all.

Original poster
Awks · 28/05/2013 20:35

You understand, that's a comfort. TY

OP posts:
punter · 28/05/2013 22:12

Feel for you, lots of hugs, horrible time for you and family. We lost our Barney last September, 12 year old rescue mongrel, we could not cope with the idea of no dog in our home, so within a fortnight we had picked out our puppy and he came to us 4 weeks later. Possibly too soon, but a puppy took all our energy and thinking time and so we perhaps coped better. Hope you can get the decision right for you.