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DH wants to rehome puppy - how will it affect him?

92 replies

AppleStroodles · 17/02/2013 20:13

By him I mean puppy, not DH...

He is 10 months old and a labradoodle and is just lovely but DH would like to re home him due to excessive shedding (about half a carrier bag full every 2 days which he says it making DS's eczema worse), separation anxiety (can't be left alone for more than an hour) and nervousness (he wees everywhere whenever a man he doesn't know comes into the house)....

He has said we can keep him if it's going to upset me that much to re home him (it will) but is it fair to keep him when DH doesn't love/want him? I love him so much but I want him to be happy so I'm really torn.

He has been well socialised, has lots of friends and gets plenty of excercise. He is great with our DC and other dogs so I don't think it would be hard to find him a loving home, but how would re homing affect him?

I can't bear the thought of him being in kennels even for a night so would want to re home him to someone we know or someone close by where I know he will be happy, safe & loved.

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needastrongone · 18/02/2013 14:25

Fair enough agatha, my post was more replying to Lilibel, as she raised the issue of people being negative about cockapoos or doodles etc. I have no issue at all with them personally, know a few lovely ones, but have issues with the whole designer breed industry making a packet out of selling renamed crossbreeds, however lovely! I just wonder what's wrong with the original breeds too!

Hope op is ok today and manages to sort out her situation so all concerned end up happy, including the dog.

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LadyTurmoil · 18/02/2013 14:33

i'm sure you're trying lots of things for the eczema already: cotton clothes and bedding, non-biological washing powder, limiting cheese/chocolate, various creams and bath oils. But have you tried Pure Potions Skin Salvation? It's an all natural cream formulated by a mum who had a daughter with severe eczema www.purepotions.biz/ You want to get some and try with a patch test - many people have recommended... (not working for the company, honest!) but think it's worth trying alternatives to steroid creams.

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AppleStroodles · 18/02/2013 17:31

We are keeping him!!!

I just can't bear the thought of losing him and DH knows that and has said he will make an effort to bond.

He has short hair and I brush him daily, wondering whether he is going through a coat change of losing his Winter coat?

We are as on top of the eczema as we can be, will ask doctor about getting tested for dogs, although he was fine before our dog started shedding so heavily.

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AppleStroodles · 18/02/2013 17:35

LadyTurmoil - Thank you for all the eczema advice, that's really kind Smile

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Floralnomad · 18/02/2013 17:50

Even if he has a short coat it may be worth speaking to a good groomer about a clip , mine is short haired ,it just gets thick but I keep him clipped so that its easier to manage when he rolls in crap and gets muddy everytime I take him out .

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AgathaF · 18/02/2013 17:54

Apple Poodles get their adult coat when they are around a year old, give or take a little, so maybe yours is shedding so much because this is happening, and it may hopefully settle down a bit in a few weeks? Obviously with Poodles, you don't get the shedding part when this happens, but maybe that comes from the Labrador part of him?

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frustratedworkingmum · 18/02/2013 18:46

wahooo :) thats great news stroodles!! You are making the right decision. Its very easy to say that you want to rehome and animal, quite a different thing to do it!

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TwelveLeggedWalk · 18/02/2013 19:03

Good to hear it stroodles. Lots of advice here and in the Doghouse on finding a good trainer, so if you can cure the separation anxiety - is he crate trained - and work on the nervousness/weeing then you'l have a much happier family dog for everyone to enjoy.

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AppleStroodles · 18/02/2013 19:13

Thanks guys. Yes he is crate trained but he actually doesn't like his crate much, he prefers to be in the thick of it with us, he (reluctantly) slept in his crate up until last week he now sleep son the sofa and seems much happier. I leave him out of his crate when I go to the shops now too and he seems happier with that arrangement!

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AppleStroodles · 18/02/2013 19:15

We did do all the right things with the crate training, he just doesn't seem to like it, unless he feels scared (of a strange man in the house e.g plumber) then he will head for his crate.

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DizzyHoneyBee · 18/02/2013 19:16

if it's causing problems for your son's health then you have to rehome the dog. He will settle; we got a new pet from a rehousing centre, at first she was shy with us and with the pet we already had and was very quiet but we got her during the school holidays and after a week she was fine. Now you wouldn't know that we hadn't always had her.

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tabulahrasa · 18/02/2013 19:47

He won't know or care whether your DH actively wants him or just tolerates him...as long as your DH is not unkind to him, he'll just get on with being a dog.

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needastrongone · 18/02/2013 19:55

Good news! Glad that there is a happy ending in sight. I am sure you can work on the other issues with some additional help if required.

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GreatUncleEddie · 18/02/2013 19:57

Is the recent move to sleeping on the sofa what has exacerbated your son's eczema? (Presumably he sits on the same sofa?)

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LadyTurmoil · 18/02/2013 20:23

BTW, does DH have eczema? I do and my daughter (not my son) has inherited my rubbish skin to a certain extent. There is guilt involved in knowing you are the parent that's passed it on to your child, iyswim, maybe your DH could be feeling that, but passing it on to "blame" the dog? Good point uncleeddie about the sofa - makes huge sense if it does correlate. Also, have you had the heating up higher than usual recently, could increase dog shedding and is crap for dry/sensitive/eczema skin...

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Inthepotty · 18/02/2013 20:40

OP.

I have a 18month old 'doodle', who I took of my stupid SIL when he was 16 weeks.

He sheds. Loads. I keep him clipped regularly, mop the wooden floors daily, Hoover 2x daily, damp dust every other day, wash vet bed bedding 2x weekly at 60. My DSS is allergic to some dogs, but fine with our boy.

Labradoodles are very quick, clever, dogs, who require lots of mental stimulation as well as excerise. This means I do a wee bit of training every day, whilst waiting for the kettle or whatever. Formal obedience classes 2 hrs a week, WT training 3hrs a week. It is a lot, but I made a commitment and it keeps my dog (and me!) happy. It means he sleeps the days away at home, so is fine to be left.

The anxiety with men can be worked on, easily. Every man he meets from now on, ask them to throw food on the floor. This way your dog associates them with good happy things. (Hotdogs chopped up good for this!) Basically revisit socialisation, don't shove him into situations, let your your dog feel confident and happy. For the love of good (and get ready as this is a big big bugbear!) don't let men lean over him to rub his face, or belly, pat him or generally get in his space. My rescue collie bitch is very man-nervous, I get fellow dog walkers to feed her, window cleaners/postie to offer treats, and any visiting male to my house is provided with treats at the door to scatter around. The following men to lick at them sounds like what my bitch does when she's nervous, appeasement behaviour to say 'I'm not a threat! Don't hurt me!"


Labradoodles are a dream to train, food led, playful. Lots of threads on reducing SA. Is your dog crate trained?


This has been a long rambly post, sorry, but every time someone says 'oh a young labradoodle will be easy to rehome' I think that that labradoodle would be taking up a rescues space and resources. Of which there are very very few.

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Turniphead1 · 19/02/2013 19:50

Stroodles - try rubbing him with Petal Cleanse (google it - suggested by Allergy UK) each day. Groom him outside. Ensure your son doesn't cuddle him wearing his pjs. Don't allow dog upstairs or at very least not in your son's room. Damp dust all areas dog is in each day or as often as you can.

HTH re excema.

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