Dog jealous of DS

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I have two staffies, aged 4.3 and 3.6. The older one (male) seems to have developed jealousy for my 10mo DS. He growls if the baby comes near him and won't come near me if I am with the baby, but is all over me at other times. Same happens with DH. Or he will try and sit on the baby to be in front of me or DH when the baby is having his nappy changed. Don't know whether this is relevant but he has also started crapping on the carpet (previously fully toiled trained).

A trip to the vet suggests no underlying health issues. He has always been a dominant and energetic dog, but usually very friendly.

It is strange as he is the one I used to trust implicitly with the baby (obviously would not leave them alone together) - my bitch is a bit neurotic and nervy, but she tolerates the baby and even seems to like him.

Admittedly now that the baby is mobile I am having to babygate the dogs on the other side of the living room, eg, if I am in the kitchen making lunch and the baby is in the living room (adjoined) and they stay there while the baby eats, but if I or DH are in the living room with DS they are allowed to roam as they please with us, and we try to pay them attention (although of course they get less than they did pre-DC). They are walked regularly and we make sure to give them lots of cuddles and attention on the sofa after DS is in bed. They aren't allowed in the bedrooms but this was implemented while I was pg. We do try to keep up their training which is food reward based.

Any thoughts? The vet seemed adamant that I should either have the dog PTS or attempt to rehome him (but said that it would be difficult, as I am well aware of the situations with staffies in rescue). The dog is also DA. the bitch is not. What are my options here?

Sorry, on iPhone and lost the end of my post.

Of course I do not want to have the dog PTS or rehomed. I love him and he is my responsibility, but I am worried for my DS. I can honestly say that I have never left DS alone with him and allowed him to pull his ears, tail or anything else. If I see DS creeping towards the dog I remove him. I don't understand what has suddenly made the dog act like this. It was important to me to keep my dogs and to train them AND the baby to live in harmony together, started to do everything I could even very early on in my pg to accomplish this. Tbh I'm a bit gutted that all my hard work seems to have gone to shit, at least as far as the male dog goes.

Am probably being stupid, but DA stands for?

Wrt the dog, you say this is a recent thing, did it begin around the time ds became mobile? I ask as it is at this point when dogs can suddenly see the baby as something very different.

I think you need a good behaviourist to actually come and observe the dogs behaviour they will then have a much clearer idea of what is going on.

Hopefully re-homing isn't something you will need to consider, with help you should be able to change how your dog is viewing your ds, but I really think you need proper help.

Try here to try and find someone registered in your area and good luck, hope you sort it out.

Thanks for replying.

DA = dog aggressive. He has attacked dogs before but never bitten a person purposely (have been caught in the firing line of his teeth once or twice myself when playing with a toy etc).

How much would a behaviourist cost roughly? I think you're right, this does need looking at by someone with expertise. We're broke, I'm not working and DH get paid fuck all. I'm scared of paying someone to come and work with him and it turn out that they are crap/a chancer. Is there an accreditation register or something?

Blimey what sort of vet do you go to!

First of all change your vet.
A growl is not aggressive behaviour it is a warning of the dog being unhappy or uncomfortable or leave me alone growl. How else can they communicate to us.

You are right to separate baby and dog and I would call a local member of the adpt to help you. This can be sorted but obviously the professional will need to see the situation on the ground to give correct treatment.

This is the sort of enquiry I get daily and all cases can be sorted without needing to pts or rehome

link to adpt trainers

Oh, sorry, yes roundabout the time the baby became mobile I suppose. Well, he was fine with him for a while, and then a month or so ago the growing started. He'd already been crawling etc for a while by then.

A crap one, minimuu. My old vet left the practise and this is one I am not so keen on. Will definitely be changing vets anyway.

APDT list is a good place to start, could you post a rough idea of where you are in the country, someone might have a personal recommendation? I could certainly recommend someone if you're in Shropshire.

I think WhereThe is on to something there. If dogs have never been around babies before then the stage at which they become mobile could be quite alarming to them - they move erratically, they make loud noises and shrieks, they bang and throw things, have noisy toys, the dog is admonished more and more for being in the same space as this noisy wriggling thing...

Yes I can absolutely see that point. I hate how uptight I have become when he is anywhere near the baby now. Not fair on the dog, but I would never forgive myself if he bit the baby. I don't tell him off for growling as I can appreciate it is a warning sign and I don't want him to learn not to give warning, I tend to remove the baby from the situation, but I don't know whether this is making things worse because the dog sees the baby as 'forbidden' somehow. Which I suppose, in light of the dog's behaviour, he now is.

I'm in the south west. I would be grateful if anyone did have any recommendations for behaviourists.

Still don't know how much these services cost though. I hope to be able to scrape some money together from somewhere (got some stuff to sell on eBay etc) but I hope it will be enough. I don't imagine they come cheap.

Do you have insurance? Mine has covered a behavioural treatment before, it's worth a try. You would need to be refered by your vet though, so you may want to find a better vet first if that is at all possible.

"I would never forgive myself if he bit the baby" In my work I recently saw a small child bitten my a "totally trustworthy" staff. It was absolutely dreadful the child will be physically scarred for life. God knows what mental scarring has taken place. The owners of the dog ( the childs grandparents) were absolutely devestated, the police and social services were involved. Ultimately it was an accident not the dogs fault but it was destroyed. Do you want this to happen to your child you and your dog. You owe it to both your DC and dog to give it to some sort of staff rescue.

I don't really have anything to add that's helpful but seriously happy give the dog to a staff rescue??? Do you know how many staffs are in rescue? Surely she owes it to the dog, the baby and herself to try and work it out before rehoming becomes an option.

No you owe it to your child to provide it with a safe environment above anything else.

Which is what she is doing. The baby and dogs are never alone and always separated.

Loads of posters on here and on a pet forum I use get flamed for getting rid of the dog when the baby comes without trying to sort out the problem.

The OP is making the right decision by not getting rid of her dog.

Over and over again I see accidents happen (including accidental deaths) when parents say "my child is separated" "my child is never allowed out that door" "we never leave the door open." All of these parents regret what they have done none can put the clocks back. One father I know whose child died (not through a dog bite) launched a campaign for parents not to assume things like this. He told us "the door was never left open" tragically his baby died because someone accidentally did leave the door open.
If you child is injured or killed through what is basically a tragic accident those parents will have to live with the consequences of this for the rest of their lives. I know from experience that if in the worse case scenario their child died they would never get over it. The sadness caused by either destroying your dog or rehoming it fades in to insignificance compared with this.

Happy gardening put every dog that growls in rescue - bonkers I am guessing you have no experience of dogs and dog behaviour. I can recommend some reading material if you would like to know why this is a stupid idea.

I am interested to know where you live or work to see many accidental deaths by dogs

Not accidental deaths by dogs accidental injuries/deaths in children by a variety of factors but everyone tragic. The OP says she never leaves the dog unsupervised with her DC; but I recently saw a large teenage boy badly bitten by his girlfriends dog who was jealous of him. He was not alone with the dog it suddenly turned on him whilst they were watching TV it took three adults and a spade to get it off! The dog was taken away by the police and destroyed. What chance would a baby have in this situation. As parents we must put our children before anything else and lets face it we would not let a sex offender into our house because we would be concerned about what they could do to your child even if you supervise them so why would let a jealous dog near your child however well supervised. I'm not necessarily saying the dog is at fault or it should be destroyed but it is unsuitable and unhappy in their situation particularly bearing in mind that she has stated she doesn't have the money to employ the services of a dog trainer.
The OP also needs to ask herself how she would feel is she had to explain to the police and SS that she knew the dog was jealous and growling but felt that she could train it to respond differently.
I am a mother of two children and work with children and have two dogs but we must make protecting children in our family and society a priority over everything else.

So you will have your dogs destroyed if they growl a couple of times?

As far as I'm concerned all other avenues should be explored before it gets to the point of having the dog destroyed.

I never said the dog has to be destroyed I don't think the dog is in the right home it is putting a child's like at risk and that to me is unacceptable.

I will check my insurance terms. Just upgraded the insurance actually so it could cover it. I am registering with the RSPCA vets as soon as I can get together the paperwork anyway as we qualify for help with vets fees. Hopefully they will be some cop.

Happy, what is it you do? My worst fear is that my dog will injure (or worse) my baby. It is not in the dog's usual nature to act this way which is why I am thinking about going down the behaviourists route rather than rehoming immediately.

The example you give about the child bitten by a staff is interesting as it often seems to be the case that it is a relative's dog that attacks the child, rather than a dog that actually lives with the child.

Regardless, I take your comments on board. My dogs are important to me and part of my family, but my DS is my priority over everything. I just want to find a solution that is fair on all parties. I am not ruling out rehoming if other options don't work out.

He is a loving dog but very strong willed. I have often wondered whether I am being fair on him by keeping him and actually think there are probably other people who could do a better job with him than I can (he was my first dog) but actually it isn't that easy to rehome dogs just like that, and in rescue there is a strong likelihood that he will be PTS before he finds this amazing owner he deserves, which would not be fair, so I am just trying to do my best here, really.

If you are near Bridgwater I can recommend a fantastic vet.

For training, I have used this lady in the past and she is fantastic. We took on a GSD with known aggression who would have been PTS if we hadn't helped. With us he is the cuddliest most obedient dog going, but with strangers,, he isn't. When Faye came to see us, we couldn't even touch him and he terrorised my son (teenager). Now the pair of them snuggle up on the sofa most evenings.

www.dogtrainingsomerset.co.uk/dog-livestock-obedience/

She's in the Bath area. If you contact her tell her Monty's Mum sent you

that your vet suggested this. As previously suggested a good behaviourist should be able to help you with this. I'm sorry happy but if everyone had your attitude the rescues would be under even greater strain. There are very very few dog attacks on children the few that happen get lots of publicity so we know about them. In 13 years in veterinary practice I have only encountered one dog who really was truly dangerous, who knows what the poor dog had been put through to end up where it was.

Lizcat that you can be so concerned about the dog and unconcerned about a child is unbelievable I only work part time but see at least 1 serious dog bite a month and in the last 12 months about 4 dog bites in children serious enough to warrant surgical intervention. We all have a moral and legal duty to make the safety of children a priority. It doesn't matter why a dog bites a child or what it?s been through to cause it to do this the welfare of children is in this country more important than that of a dog.
Many parents have this "it will never happen to me" ethos whether its drowning in ponds, being bitten by dogs or accidental poisonings but if you talk to anyone in an A and E dept or a children?s ward they will tell you it happens and it happens to any family regardless of race economic status or education and in all cases the effects on those that love that child are absolutely disastrous.
The teenage boy who was bitten had been living with the family for a few months the dog had been slightly jealous at the beginning but seemed to be improving and was friendly to the boy. The dog had no history of aggression in fact quite the opposite and as far as the family could tell the attack was unprovoked. The bite was horrendous but his sheer size saved him and the fact that there were adult males around strong enough to get the dog off prevented the bite being much more serious a baby would not have survived such a bite. Again I not advocating destroying the dog it?s the wrong dog for this family; the OP is expressing doubts about her ability to manage it. I appreciate rescues are full but I will reiterate again a child?s welfare is more important than a dogs.

happygardening The op was asking for help about her dog, she has been given lots and hopefully with help she will have a happy outcome.

The dog has not bitten her child, it has growled and shown her that, at present it is feeling uncomfortable around the child, the op now just needs guidance from a professional to work out how best to adapt her dog to this new situation.

I do not have my head in the sand wrt dogs, my ds was extremely badly bitten in the face by a dog a week ago today, (there is a thread on here should you wish to add more stats to your arsenal of doom). Even in light on that I still think the op should try and work with her dog.

I agree that the child's welfare is important. However as a behaviourist who has this sort of enquiry several times a day I have very rarely seen a dog turn on a child or owner. Usually because they come and get advice follow through the behaivour required to ensure dog and child/adult are safe.

This is a really common problem that can be solved very easily as long as advice is given by a trained professional. No need to go mad and rehome the dog etc but obviously it is sensible to keep baby and dog apart until they have all been assessed.

Maybe as you have seen many cases of aggression in dogs your advice is not correct whereas I see cases which do not turn into aggression - maybe my training, experience is correct.

Lotterywinners if you have problems find a good behaviourist (within price bracket PM and I will see if I can help find one near by)

sorry about bad typing I've got freezing cold fingers from being out with a clients dog!!!!