Anyone else listening to the Observer podcast Foundling and wanting to discuss?

[DorsetCafes]

Not telly but I don’t know which category it belongs to!

This is about an Observer investigative podcast called Foundling - I am desperate to discuss it with someone!! Has anyone else listened to it yet?

podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/foundling-tortoise-investigates/id1590561275?i=1000755703771

I was wondering about that, too.

If I recall correctly he was a married 25 year old father of 2 when he impregnated Jess' birth mother, the teenager.

A fertile man having unprotected sex didn't think pregnancy might occur??? Erm...

I also find it very hard to believe that word of her being on the news with a baby (that he'd know was 9 months later) didn't make its way back to him. They ran in the same circles enough to have sex multiple times - Surely her parents, her friends, any of his friends who knew her friends - Everyone who knew of her would be talking about that crazy story?

You might enjoy the BBC sounds podcast series “ The Gift” which explores the consequences of DNA testing for some families.

I wondered about this too.

However, are we just so used to the 24-hour news cycle now that we forget things might have been different then?

I moved here in 1994 and I seem to remember that the TV stations went 'off' still at a certain point in the evening. I remember when Channel Five started.

If you missed the nightly news for a few nights (possible) and also managed to pick up the sort of paper that happened to have a different story blaring across the front page - maybe you could have missed it? Also, weren't things more regionalised then?

I think the more fundamental point may be if you are a married man with two kids having an affair - you're pretty darn good at compartmentalising anyway.

They could have stayed in touch.

The other point I found bizarre was - isn't it established she didn't 'really' leave the baby by the verge? She just said she did. Anyone else wondering the same thing?

Yes I wondered that about the verge. So many odd bits. Did she drive there at all? How did she call the police?

Also the fact she did it again?? Why hasn’t this been covered further.

Lewis sounds like he’s in denial.

The way the story is introduced on the podcast makes the whodunnit aspect sound more mysterious than it is. It becomes obvious that everyone in the village knew who was involved, and probably the father and families knew more than they let on as well. It’s really a story about revenge, I think. What a spectacular way to get back at someone you are angry with. Which means the more interesting questions about how it happened and why it happened twice will never be answered.

I just finished listening to this today after subscribing so I could binge it all.

It seemed almost like Jess was trying to ‘Wendy’ (to use a MN term) her birth mother by infiltrating the family but refusing to have contact with her BM.

Having said that I thought the BM’s behaviour was abhorrent. By all accounts she enjoyed and almost revelled in the media attention when she ‘found’ the baby, she then went on to dump another baby 14 months later, and I can’t believe she hasn’t been sacked from her work for gross misconduct, I found that part extremely disturbing. Also BM replying to Jess’ Facebook message, to deny having anything to do with it, when she could have simply ignored the message. Again like she was revelling in tinkering around in Jess’ head. So I think I can understand why Jess doesn’t want to speak to her. The Facebook message was the chance to come clean, or at least ask to meet up to talk in person. She just lied again and I don’t think Jess will ever get any truth from her BM. I think the BM is a deeply disturbed and malevolent individual.

I also don’t believe for a minute that Lewis knew nothing about Jess. He basically admitted keeping in touch with the BM over the years, and knew exactly who she was when she got involved with his other daughter. It wasn’t clear to me whether he is now separated from the mother of all of his other children, if I were Chloe’s mum I would never forgive him for being in part, in my opinion, directly responsible for what happened.

I didn’t take it as the hoat questioning Jess’s reasons. The hoast reached out to Jess first! I took it as she knew people who ask why, but I totally understood her reasons. We all want to know where we come from.

id love to know who the nanny / Jennifer is. It worries me she’s still working in a senior position in the NHS. I’ve not been able to find the old newspaper article about the nanny finding “Heather” as she was then.

@CanaryLibra what is to ”wendy”?? I have missed that bit of MN jargon…

I listened to this on Amazon. What suprised me was the fact that this occurred in the 1980's. If it had been in the 50's or 60's I could have understood the Mothers actions a bit more. And then for it to happen a second time!! I felt so sad for Jess and the whole family.

It’s like a 3rd wheel stealing a friend. Like yoko Ono but in friendships I think?

sorry, where are you finding free episodes?

i only get the first 2 on the different platforms i’ve searched.

thanks!

They were on Spotify, released weekly free . That's how I listened, have they been put behind a pay wall?

I just went on to check and they actually have been put behind a pay wall, I wonder why

@Member984815

yes, they’re not available under Spotify’s premium membership.

when i click on the episode I’m sent to the Observer’s membership page.

I'm adopted and used to get the Norcap magazine where all the stories were hopeful, where biological mothers had been forced to give away their children and always hoped to see them again. I was very disappointed to find out some biological mothers are horrible, selfish people, who care more about themselves than their children.

I had always wanted to find my birth mother, imagining she had been waiting for me to find her. Turns out she had 4 children adopted in 4 years with different men, and she made me feel bad. She wasn't nice to me at first when I found her, and I stupidly told her that I found my birth father and that he was nicer to me than her. Then she started blackmailing me to give her all his information or she wouldn't talk to me. She got jealous that I got on with him and told him that he isn't my father. She was angry I contacted my half brother who she kept, as would rather that he didn't know he had any family, and made up lies to turn him against me to make me look like a liar, when she had told him lots of lies. She even lied who his father is, as we found who she claimed the father is, and he said that she was already preg when she knew him, and claimed he was the father, when she had a full term son 4 months after meeting him. I haven't found all my siblings, so her name was Beryl Ann Lee from Sheffield if anybody is related to her.

I am listening and think the birth mother is a female sociopath, to do this once is just beyond most mothers imaginations but twice?

I do not think your experience is unusual @SusieSmth4 and I am so sorry you have been thru this, you deserved better then, and now.

The other abandoned baby had a different father. I wonder if they found him if they would shed any light. How old was she when she abandoned them?

Hi how do I listen to the rest of the episodes? I’ve listened to two. Must I subscribe?

Great post @Smorgs.

Agree with PP that Jennifer appears to be a sociopath. Abandoning two newborn babies in 14 months, appearing smiling in the news pretending to have found one of them, lying to Jess when she contacts her on Facebook (why did she reply at all? It's unbelievable that she sends chatty messages to Jess and then pretends she has no information for her when she is literally her birth mother), behaving in an extraordinarily unprofessional, unethical and deeply disturbing manner in relation to Chloe, holding a senior NHS mental health position working with very vulnerable young people given all this history - it was just so shocking.

Thank you to those of you on this thread who have shared your own personal stories about adoption and seeking biological parents/relatives. I don't think those of us without similar experiences can possibly understand Jess's situation. I disagree that Jess has "main character energy" and agree with the PP who said the podcast is about her life story so naturally she's the "main character". She doesn't owe the listener anything. It ended with lots of questions and loose threads - just like Jess's life itself.

A very gripping listen and expertly written and produced. But a very sad story overall and my heart goes out to poor Chloe and her family.

Wishing Jess all the best.

I subscribed to Tortoise for a month to listen beyond episode 2 on Spotify.