Nikki Grahame - Who Is She?

[manysummersago]

Has anyone seen this? Catching up now.

Just extremely sad

I'm so pleased someone made a thread about this, I've been thinking about it since Thursday. I loved Nikki in BB, even though she was complex, I just got her.

I have never heard anorexia described so succinctly, I've never been able to put it into words myself but when Nikki said it was like her friend, I just cried and cried because it's so true. It's your comfort, reassurance, companion and the only person in your life that understands.

The psychologist was right when she said it's not about just eating a sandwich, you physically can't eat. So many people don't realise that.

However, it was irresponsible of her to say that a BMI of 16 is healthy, it absolutely is not. Even me, with a BMI of 18, felt twitchy when she said it, anorexia makes you competitive.

I thought it would be an exploitative show about fame and reality TV but it was respectful and informative.

I can't imagine what it must have been like, growing up in a rehab centre like that, it's almost inhuman.

Going into the BB house in her bunny girl outfit, heartbreaking.

Bless her Mum too.

I didn’t like Nikki in BB. She had a mean side, esp wrt Sam (who I think was transgender) - - Nikki was so derogatory referring to them as ‘man beast’ and repulsive etc. I couldn’t really get over that and like her.

However, she was young and immature at time so… that’s mitigating.

I agree, the documentary was heartbreaking :( Such a cruel disease. I really felt for Sue, her mum. And Nikki of course.

I agree with @Lovethatforyou and thought Nikki was really nasty to people. I watched a clip recently where she was just horrible to someone. Her death is a tragedy for those that loved her, of course.

It is really sad to think that the two most recognisable BB housemates are gone, and were both so young. They both divided opinion too.

Her mum

The bit where she talked about how she hangs the dress up when she goes to bed and cuddles the Teddy - I'm tearing up again just thinking about it.

She was in institutions for 11 years or something before being on Big Brother and had significant emotional developmental delay. I used to think she was playing to the cameras but not realise she wasn’t. Just so sad.

So absolutely heartbreaking
And so utterly scary. One of the things I'd be most scared of my child getting

And the pictures of her were so shocking

I haven’t watched it yet but for those parents/ friends on here for those with/ in recovery from an ED, I’ve just watched the Taylor Swift documentary on Netflix and she explains beautifully how she was drawn into restricted eating. It’s around 22 minutes in to save you watching the whole thing. I work with ED and I’ll use it (with permission) in groups looking at social media.
Sadly Eating disorders have the highest mortality rate in young people in the UK and it’s incredibly hard to treat. My heart aches for patients and their families to the mums in here

So how do we stop eating disorders developing in our children?

It really scares me

gunnersgold that is shocking, a sheet of paper with what foods to eat, Jesus that has really shocked me. Yes I can only imagine now she's 18 how you have less input. My oldest DD is 17 and I see myself she is very much now her own person, which is great, but I just don't know how I'd cope with something like this. I have 3 dd's and I have to say this really scares me. My heart goes out to you Gunner and your dd & all the other mums & dds on this thread. It must feel like a nightmare.

I also picked up on the “healthy BMI is 16” - it really isn’t and agree incredibly irresponsible to show that comment.

@purpleme12 speaking as a mum of a DD recovering from Anorexia, I really don’t know! With my DD it started in lockdown. But I think that was the catalyst rather than the whole reason why. Sadly I think it’s all down to my DD’s personality type. A high achieving perfectionist who is her own worst critic. She has always had an inner voice that tells her she is not good enough, not deserving and a bad person. That inner voice that has always been there eventually manifested in to her eating disorder inner voice that told her she shouldn’t eat.

I think the sole thing I have come to understand about eating disorders (from DD) is how the not eating is really just the by product. The psychological aspects of it are utterly terrifying. The only way I can describe it is that the sufferer is completely consumed by another entity that lives inside of them (the inner voice). Like an abusive partner that controls their every move. There is the person and then there is the eating disorder. The more entrenched they become the more the person become just the eating disorder. At that point they are unable to choose to help themselves, to choose to just eat. Even if it means they die.

NHS provision for ED’s are woeful and not fit for purpose. If the sufferer is under 18 you are referred to CAMH’s ED services. But they are so overwhelmed and it’s a lottery postcode. GP’s, which are often the first port of call, are very poorly educated and ignorant when it comes to ED’s. They simply don’t know enough about them. Very often people are turned away because they aren’t “sick enough”. Adult services are even worse. It really is up to the families to get their loved ones better. It’s utterly dire.

@Rollergirl11

NHS provision for ED’s are woeful and not fit for purpose. If the sufferer is under 18 you are referred to CAMH’s ED services. But they are so overwhelmed and it’s a lottery postcode. GP’s, which are often the first port of call, are very poorly educated and ignorant when it comes to ED’s. They simply don’t know enough about them. Very often people are turned away because they aren’t “sick enough”. Adult services are even worse. It really is up to the families to get their loved ones better. It’s utterly dire.

Sadly it's a lack of suitably qualified staff. Money has been thrown at mental health provision but they literally can't get the staff to expand services even as agency on £££s. It needs a huge overhaul to make it an attractive career for one thing that actually retains staff, and improves services for all, but there isn't an appetite for it in government which is sad. A tragedy even.

It was a very hard and sad watch

She was so young. I’m about 10 years younger than her and watched her when BB came out.

Not seen this yet but will do.

A cousin of my SIL has bulimia and is an actress and is about 5 years younger than Nikki but she’s been very pressurised in her life with social media and the desire to be a certain look. Luckily she’s retrained in her career recently and her bulimia I think is under control.

Her flats on right move it's so sad ,

@Bedsheets4knickers

Her flats on right move it's so sad ,

How do you know it is hers? Genuine question - not snapping!

I think it's worth mentioning that, although some of Nikki's behaviour / personality could have been due to years of hospital/ ED unit stays etc, there is also increasing recognition of strong links between anorexia and neurodiversity - so it's also possible that her ED and the "outbursts" / "tantrums" (as they were described during her time on BB & later media appearence, if my memory serves me correctly) were due to / intrinsically linked to being a neurodiverse person.

I found it almost terrifying when talking about her anorexia, Nicky told her therapist, emphatically, I'm very good at it. She had found something she could excel at. This terrifying, dangerous thing, she excelled at. It's a monstrous disease.

The really sad thing is that I don’t know what could have been done to save her. I really don’t.

Where can I watch this please? Sounds like a heartbreaking but interesting and informative watch.

It’s on More4