Reported Missing BBC1

[Toddlerteaplease]

Anyone watch this. It's fascinating. I felt really sorry for the mans wife, her life can't be easy with a husband with such severe PTSD. The police obviously thought he was very dodgy from their comments about not knowing who the real person was.

Yes I was applauded at the police woman’s comments about the couple’s benefits. Very worrying attitude.

I was also a bit at the policewoman's comment about the benefits.

I love this programme though. It's so well made and utterly gripping.

You mean when she said 'they're on all that?' incredulously? It was rather strange!

Basically it's just what you claim when you can't work and have children and are a carer so not sure why she was so incredulous! Just cos they get those things doesn't mean they get loads of money after all

Yes I got the impression the police thought he was dodgy too

It was when she said. "We May never know who the real xxx is"

I watched this twice. She did go on about not knowing who he was. I really thought he would have been a fake / never served / had taken the money. I felt so bad afterwards.

The wife had a total makeover afterwards I was sure they must have split.

The wife looked like a completely different woman, didn't she?

I found the whole thing quite strange. I thought everyone was dodgy, or potentially dodgy, including the workmate who reported him missing.

I suppose we'll never know but I wouldn't mind betting there's far more to this than meets the eye.

You're right. I wonder if his work mate would have told police he had made contact.

Yes. I found it very odd. And also expected it to all turn out to be a scam. But I presume the reason they put the post script about the MOD increasing his pension, to prove he was genuine. I don't know how on Earth his wife coped with his behaviour. Caused by illness or not.

I googled it and he was arrested for suspected theft but cleared after an 18 month investigation. It felt like the first officers who were looking for him were far more sympathetic about his mental health issues than the female sergeant. Some of her comments were judgemental. The comment about not knowing who he really was was unacceptable in a public forum given how heavily he'd been trolled.

Oh Sheilas husband, what a lovely man.

Oh I'm glad to see this is back as I found series 1 fascinating.

I seemed to have missed series 2, does anyone know if it's available anywhere?

We also watched the last 2 episodes of this, thank goodness the 2 people with dementia were found so quickly. I thought the police might use search dogs in this kind of scenario, particularly with the man who had wandered off from home and lived quite rurally.
Last week's episode was confusing, I thought there were 2 different woman at first, but then realised it was the wife before and after.

I watched this last night, the gentleman who was registered blind and cared for his wife with dementia was lovely. Such a heartbreaking situation for him. I thought the police were brilliant the way they supported him until she was found.

I was surprised with the second case that the wife had left him alone for hours. Of course carers need and deserve a break but as they had family I'd have thought they couldve come up with an excuse on why someone would be round while she went out. Even if they pretended they were doing the garden or something.

Yes. Particularly as she commented that he hated being left on his own.

Oh god I cried at the end when John (I think that's his name) talked about Sheila 😢😢
I want to give him a hug

@purpleme12 Heartbreaking.

I remember the last series and a woman with dementia wondered off and they found her body in a field. Such an awful disease. I feel for the elderly more than any other group.

'I remember the last series and a woman with dementia wondered off and they found her body in a field. Such an awful disease. I feel for the elderly more than any other group.'

Yes and for relatives the stress is huge, witnessing their loved one deteriorate and suffer. There of course isn't a fail safe solution and people will wander off but I do think leaving a vulnerable person alone for hours is an accident waiting to happen.

My grandad lost my grandma after 65 years of marriage. He didn't have dementia but wasn't used to being alone. My mum made sure either her her husband her kids and their partners made him lunch and tea and put him to bed. I know some people don't have family or live too far away. Totally different scenario. My grandma did start to wander off and kept walking to the doctors every day. Luckily she didn't get far. I think she was at the early stages.

I think Ring doorbells would be a good idea so you receive an alert if someone walks in and out.

I suppose the logical thing would be to look someone in who was likely to wander off? But that seems wrong and potentially dangerous.

I got the impression with the second couple the husband wasn't in such a bad way. Of course, John took Sheila with him, and she still wandered off.

My grandmother had Alzheimer's in the 1980s and nobody knew much about it then; I'd never heard of it before. She wandered off out of her house a few times. Reminded me of her and what my poor old grandad went through.

*lock someone in not look

What an absolutely lovely man Sheila’s husband was - so devoted to her. I just wanted to hug him.

' I suppose the logical thing would be to look someone in who was likely to wander off? But that seems wrong and potentially dangerous.'

Absolutely it would be wrong, also we wouldn't lock children in the house and presume that would keep them safe. I just think if you need to leave someone alone for 7hours you'd arrange for a relative (of which this family had, I know not everyone does) to pop in after an hour or even be there the whole time on the pretext of doing household jobs so the person with dementia doesn't feel they are being babysat.

Really difficult case tonight. Can't believe he was able to abscond from the MH unit. And the poor son. He really needs a better care plan.

His poor son......

Can't imagine what he goes through.