Page 2 | Fleabag - I'm disappointed

HunnyCaramel · 08/04/2019 07:34

What would we call the alternative show? 'Mrs. G. Twoshoes (happily married to rev. Twoshoes) Gets To Work On Time'?

Connieston · 08/04/2019 07:37

She doesn't say that she finds the anal sex painful as far as I can remember and she's a sex addict essentially, making bad choices as a crappy coping mechanism. In series two she reflects on it and tries to make better decisions.

SmiledWithTheRisingSun · 08/04/2019 07:38

You don't have to like it OP 🤷🏻‍♀️

RuffleCrow · 08/04/2019 07:41

Yes, in the first episode she says she loves everything about sex "the anticipation, the chase....not necessarily the feeling of it" or something along those lines. So sex itself isn't necessarily something that feels pleasurable to her but it makes her feel wanted/important to another human being. Gosh, I was so like her in my early twenties

chardiej · 15/07/2021 22:19

Thank goodness for sanity. All over the world, the minute they hear my accent, men want to know if I like Fleabag...I wonder why...not.

bibliomania · 16/07/2021 19:49

I don't quite get Fleabag, tbh. Or Girls.

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 16/07/2021 19:53

@Tehstean

I wanted to like this, I really did. It sounded great, with strong female leads - yay!

I have only watched the first two episodes but can't get over the anal sex stuff in the first episode. I hate that the writing normalised this. And normalised her finding a sex act painful but carrying on anyway. I don't want my kids to see this as standard issue casual sex, which starting a new programme with this scene does.

I'm really saddened that a programme I thought would be great for women has to feature painful casual anal sex, carried out by someone who doesn't even ask explicit consent in it. It has stopped me wanting to watch more as I now can't empathise with the lead character and also feel her role model status is significantly compromised.

Is it just me being an uptight killjoy, or did anyone else think - what a shame?

I had the same reaction the first time I watched it. However, a good friend whose judgement I normally trust told me how good she thought Fleabag was, so I gave it another go, and I'm glad I did. I found both series really touching and thought-provoking as well as funny.

BIoodyStupidJohnson · 16/07/2021 19:57

I think we have to get past this limiting idea that every woman on TV has to be a role model.

chardiej · 16/07/2021 23:11

All this, and Fleabag, reminds me of Germaine Greer's most famous statement about women having very little idea of how much men hate them.

IdblowJonSnow · 16/07/2021 23:28

Yabu op! It's amazing! And she does have some successes and triumphs at various points.
The last episode broke my heart.

StiffyByng · 19/07/2021 20:10

The first series is about grief and how damaged she is by it, and the second series about her journey out of it through building relationships, in my opinion. The original play/monologue is funny but heartbreaking.

She's not meant to be a romcom heroine.

TheMarzipanDildo · 20/07/2021 16:23

I love Fleabag. As with others on this thread, didn’t particularly get on with the first episode, but something hooked me in and it got better and better. She’s not supposed to be a role model, she’s damaged and doesn’t really value herself at first.

It’s very sad for a sitcom actually!

whistlers · 22/07/2021 08:50

@LittleBearPad

She’s pretty broken and makes some terrible decisions -particularly about sex. It’s not a kids programme!

Yes and she addresses this later on.

Not every programme has to be a beacon of guiding light.

MissTrip82 · 22/07/2021 08:57

She’s never presented as a role model.

And I disagree that a woman isn’t strong because she finds herself in the position you describe.

I don’t know what your kids have to do with it as this is clearly not a show for children.

BlijEi · 22/07/2021 09:04

She hates herself and sees her body as her only commodity, only way to feel desired or loved, and the only distraction from her crushing guilt and loneliness.

Season 1 is particularly sad and hard to stomach at times but funny and heartwarming in equal measures. Season 2 is the sun behind the clouds for me. Some would interpret the ending as sad but to me it's the perfect promise that Fleabag will finally find self forgiveness and self love.

It's a very clever and human show, I think if you give it a chance (and watch it alone maybe), without expecting it to be a sitcom, you will enjoy it. Of course it's possible that it just isn't for you and there is nothing wrong with that, but for anyone else reading this and in doubt: it is not a sitcom!

StiffyByng · 22/07/2021 09:14

@BlijEi

She hates herself and sees her body as her only commodity, only way to feel desired or loved, and the only distraction from her crushing guilt and loneliness.

Season 1 is particularly sad and hard to stomach at times but funny and heartwarming in equal measures. Season 2 is the sun behind the clouds for me. Some would interpret the ending as sad but to me it's the perfect promise that Fleabag will finally find self forgiveness and self love.

It's a very clever and human show, I think if you give it a chance (and watch it alone maybe), without expecting it to be a sitcom, you will enjoy it. Of course it's possible that it just isn't for you and there is nothing wrong with that, but for anyone else reading this and in doubt: it is not a sitcom!

Having watched it a few times now, I've come to the conclusion that the end of series 2 is perfection as you say. It's not a happy ever after with Hot Priest, but her relationship with him has helped to rebuild her from where she was in series one; the love she's (re)found is with her sister, who through that has found the strength to break out of her own bad situation. So the future is bright.

Pagwatch · 22/07/2021 09:15

the two series are a complete piece. Fleabag is supposed to be a mess and particularly dreadful in terms of poor choices and risky behaviour including around sex.

I don't think its possible to tell her story without this backdrop and PWB does this brilliantly. its shocking but its meant to be. you're not even meant to like her until you get some sense of everything shes working through.
if its not for you thats ok but i think the two series are one of the best bits of storytelling around womens lives ever. her relationship with her sister is brilliantly done and the first episode of season 2 is just...

StiffyByng · 22/07/2021 09:19

It's not post-watershed Miranda, even if it does have a female lead character who breaks the fourth wall.

The number of times I've seen the two programmes compared is depressing.

chardiej · 16/08/2021 20:38

@Tehstean

I wanted to like this, I really did. It sounded great, with strong female leads - yay!

I have only watched the first two episodes but can't get over the anal sex stuff in the first episode. I hate that the writing normalised this. And normalised her finding a sex act painful but carrying on anyway. I don't want my kids to see this as standard issue casual sex, which starting a new programme with this scene does.

I'm really saddened that a programme I thought would be great for women has to feature painful casual anal sex, carried out by someone who doesn't even ask explicit consent in it. It has stopped me wanting to watch more as I now can't empathise with the lead character and also feel her role model status is significantly compromised.

Is it just me being an uptight killjoy, or did anyone else think - what a shame?

Just saw this:

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4156810/

"Our findings suggest that coercion could emerge as a dominant script for anal intercourse at these young ages if left unchallenged."

Interesting. I couldn't watch another minute after the anal sex scene at the beginning, it made me feel physically unwell. I'm not a prude but I do care about what girls are having to put up with these days, and to come, and how we seem to be unintentionally solidifying that for them.

Kanaloa · 16/08/2021 20:41

It does actually deal with that though - the second series sees her taking a step back from sex and trying to sort her life out a bit.

I didn’t love the first series but enjoyed the second. Thought it came to a lovely bittersweet ending, and I loved seeing her and her sister’s relationship develop.

Kanaloa · 16/08/2021 20:42

I do think there was a bit of an issue in the marketing for it though - it was played a bit like a typical bbc 3 comedy when actually it’s more like a drama with some darkly funny bits.

16purplecolour16 · 16/08/2021 20:51

@Kanaloa - agree that it is a drama with funny bits. Your comment has compelled me to give the show a third chance.

ShowOfHands · 16/08/2021 20:57

You have to stick with her and watch her grow. It's brilliantly written and speaks to female experience like nothing else. It's dark and hilarious. You shouldn't like her at first. You should love her eventually. The other characters are similarly well written.

It's superb.

Kanaloa · 16/08/2021 21:00

@16purplecolour16

It’s definitely good, although I did find the first few episodes graphic and uncomfortable to watch, but I think that’s the point. It isn’t supposed to be really funny, it’s a character piece dealing with a woman at a very difficult time. I don’t know if you’ve seen it all, but when it comes out later what happened to her friend, it makes the earlier episodes a lot more understandable. It’s like she is deliberately trying to punish herself/make herself unhappy.

So many people I’ve talked to see the second series as a love story between the priest and fleabag but I saw it like fleabag’s love story with herself, her long journey to self acceptance and self love.

hahahayoumustbejoking · 16/08/2021 21:42

Don't like it you say? Damn you I say!