Did any Poly people watch Louis Theroux last night?

[PolyAnnie]

Just wondering what peiple thought of it as a representation of poly families.

I liked it.

I thought it showcased a lot of happiness and family ties. It showed that kids can be happy within poly families but it also showed the realities of it too. Such as a new person coming in to the fold or one person wanting a different living set up (experienced both)

I liked it because it showed normal poly families through good events and struggling just as all mono couples do too.

Watching it now with DP

Don't forget media manipulates you to think a certain way

"they decided not to assign it a gender.. either .. ."

Eh? I thought they just decided not to find out the sex at the scan.

Just watched on catch up. It seems there is always a hierarchy - one partner is going to be more desired than the other, so it does seem a bit sad. Feel a bit depressed to be honest. Although agree as someone else pointed out, that monogamy can be lonely and unsatisfying as well.

" I wondered how the set up of all of them living together in the co house ( for lots of Uncles and aunts she said) would work that once the baby arrived"

In the few societies where women have more than one husband, one of the explanations given is that it protects children as the parenting is shared and if one 'father' dies, there's another to take care of the mother and child.

Just googled and found the following
Studies (Beckerman and Valentine 2002) have revealed that at least 20 Amazonian tribal societies accept that a child could, and ideally should, have more than one father. Members of these societies believe that all men who had a sexual relationship with a woman during her pregnancy contributed to the formation of her baby. This concept of "partible paternity" ensures that each child will be born with several fathers to take responsibility for the child, increasing their chances of survival.

Prince Peter of Greece (1963), who studied information on the polyandry of the Kandyan Sinhalese, the Kerala Tiyyans, and the Tibetans, concluded that there existed a greater unity and solidarity of sibling groups among those practicing fraternal polyandry. He also emphasized the economic function of polyandry which intensified this unity and solidarity.

www.newworldencyclopedia.org/entry/Polyandry

Just watching it now. I agree with most of the comments on here. It strikes me that all the relationships are very unequal.

Is the woman who shares a bed with two men pregnant?

I didn't see any signs that Amanda, the IT woman was pregnant.

Maybe it was the way she was sitting. She looked a lot plumper around the middle at the end of the programme.

I found Amanda and Nick most unattractive and possibly very well matched. And Bob quite useful in bed but a social misfit. Very weird set up. And poor Nick not very happy about it.

I didn't pick up on Nick being unhappy to be honest. I did see one unhappy person in all the other setups.

I had initially thought Amanda was pregnant. They didn’t seem to be hurting anyone, I’d like to burn that greasy looking pit of a bedroom down though.
Heidi was a dreadful person. Selfish, immature and cruel, I hope Gerry finds the strength to leave her. I don’t think Gretchen was entirely pleased with the set up, but I suspect her interest in sex was less than she said and this is the arrangement that’s come about.

I can’t even be bothered to comment on the young lot, they were so ‘la la, we’re so alternative'.

I bet Heidi would hit the roof with Jerry actually found someone else...

Made me so uncomfortable when asked about their sex life, Gretchen was like 'more than I would like, less than he would'

So she's, like, having sex with him more than she'd actually like to. Very uncomfortable.

I too thought a few of them seemed unhappy.

theonewith Louis said at the start that Heidi runs a clothing business from home.

gwen at the end they showed a photo of the baby and said they hadn’t assigned a gender.

"I’d like to burn that greasy looking pit of a bedroom down though. "

With cheap children's blankets from the 80s!
You should be able to save money with this setup!

It was hardly an inviting prospect.

Thinking about it, has Louis Theroux ever made a documentary that made the subjects look good? It's always a bit tragic isn't it?

It made me sad.

I watched it last night.
If I’d watched it out of context I felt you could easily put Gretchen as Joes mother. He struck me as a moody teenager who’s been told his girlfriend has to go home.

Jeez watched this last night and agree that nobody looked particularly happy, except Heidi who was having her cake and eating it.

Beyond fucked up to discuss all this and be so open about it in front of their kids ….. Joes kids looked as miserable as sin.

The happiness of the kids doesn't seem to be high up on their list of concerns. It seems very selfish and immature.

Watched it last night. I agree that no one really seemed happy apart from Heidi and Joe. I also thought Amanda looked pregnant at one point. It didn't look as though any of them were concerned about the children and the effect it might be having on them, very sad.

Yes. It was all a bit me me me, with no concern for other people's feelings.

Yes did you see Joe and Gretchen's kid when Joe was kissing Heidi? She didn't like it was pulling a face!

The worst bit for me would be sharing a bed with 2 men, just no!

Seemed to em like both sets of younger people were using polyamory as a way of combatting insecurity and fear.

In the case of the thrupple, there was a big sense not just of depression and trauma, but of being awkwardness and being a misfits dad being grateful anyone could love you at all. . Like this was better than no-one loving you. They were clinging desperately to one another in an unfriendly world.

The eco-homestead lot. I got a sense this was a lot about how to form a viable enough social/economic unit to survive and to also raise a child. Like it’s just a bit too difficult to survive as a family formed of a couple and children, that the net needs to be a bit wider. That forging a variety of bonds based on your sexuality was a more secure way forward through life, even if you had to battle your own feelings about it at times, or glance out your insecurities in one relationship by feeling desired in another.

I knew some gay guys in London who did something similar in order to get onto the property ladder. A couple who split up but stayed together and both brought new partners in. They bought a one bed flat all together- one couple in living room, one in bedroom. They had occasional drug fuelled orgies all together. It kind of descended into a mess of jealously and violence after a while. The market went up a lot and they s-lit the equity eventually. Original couple got back together a few years later.

In the three-person marriage, one of the blokes blurred out towards the end that he’d like to be enough for Amanda by himself. I couldn’t imagine their very intense set-up could survive much longer with at least one of them feeling that way. I imagine with polyamory it’s crucial that you’re all on the same page. I don’t think the programme portrayed very functional poly set ups. They all seemed unbalanced and unfair and I very much worried about the children - especially Heidi talking openly about how it had all started due to her postnatal depression. That’s quite a burden that the little girl may end up feeling she has to carry.