The A Word

[GetHappy]

Starts again tomorrow....anyone watching??

Haven't seen episode 2 yet but thought episode 1 was ridiculous.
Where were the meetings with the LA about altering the EHCP for the specialist placement?
Why did the parents have to chair a meeting to 'reassure' other parents (FFS) while the Headteacher and staff watched?
Why weren't the school not in massive trouble when they allowed him (and another child) to get on the roof a second time?

Agree that the makers could have given some thought to the fight it takes many parents to get their child into a specialist provision. There was one line in tonight’s episode where the mother comments to her husband that they are lucky to get Joe into the school so quickly as some children have to wait years. Also, the record shop encounter was weird. I thought they might be building up to the guy working there being on the spectrum.

They may have glossed over the fight to get a placement stage but they have highlighted well the ridiculous distance that children with an ASC often have to travel to find a suitable placement. ds1 does nearly fifty miles on a daily basis and that is hard enough for him.

Showing the battles families face to get provision doesn’t make for entertaining viewing!

I think a lot they have done well but other bits in the effort to keep it entertaining is inevitably going to make for frustrating viewing for people who are aware of the actual processes

From where they are living to the location of Joe's ' new ' school is approx 110 -120 miles. Therefore over 200 mile round trip daily. Surely it would have been deemed unsuitable. Would the child/parent really be expected to travel that distance ?

I think if they had wanted to highlight the distance then a school in Lancaster would have probably been much more realistic - still an hour in the car each way but one of the closest cities to where they are.

There is a guideline of 45 minutes travel for primary school age children but it is only a guideline so frequently gets ignored if there is no close suitable provision. If this was the closest provision then the LA would fund a taxi but if the parents choose a school at further distance then yes it would be down to the parents.

Many parents would also not want to put a child as young as Joe in taxi transport. The drivers have no training in ASC so it can be difficult for them to de-escalate problems like ds1 deciding the vehicle was moving too slowly so getting out and walking home instead. Luckily, he was not on the motorway at the time.

I know a lot of the programme is not realistic but the makers have to keep it entertaining to keep the viewers watching. It took 18 years to get a diagnosis for my ds, viewers wouldn't wait that long. Also all the assessments and meetings where people just didn't turn up would make very boring viewing. Joe is played by an 8 year old so a realistic portrayal of meltdown is probably too much to expect. I'm guessing this might be why the older ASD character has been introduced.

I agree the makers have to make it entertaining but a wee mention of the obstacles SEN parents face wouldn’t be that difficult or boring. A negative old school headmistress for example or an incompetent SENCO. Morven Christie’s character would be great locking horns with people like that. All the school staff have just been so nice and competent. The school caretaker was a breath of fresh air when he said ‘ you should control your kid’. I’m speaking as an LSA and I know how unhelpful schools and LAs can be. It wouldn’t have been that boring to have as part of the plot. Btw I love the character of Ralph (and the actor who plays him) and I love the interaction between him and Christopher Ecclestone.

I was pleasantly surprised by last night’s episode as it showed a bit more of the behavioural issues of autism. The meltdowns were quite realistic. It was still mainly ludicrous though - could you even imagine a parent driving from Kendal to Manchester for a school? You would have to waste the whole day there just hanging around to drive them home again. Surely they would have attempted a 1:1 LSA in his current school first?! But on the whole I enjoyed it.

I wish they'd let us all in on how they magically got Joe into a specialist unit? Oh that the rest of us with ASD kids should be so lucky.

I quite enjoy it and it is good to see a show that includes ASD, Downs Syndrome, breast cancer, marital breakdown/ disharmony etc.

There is closer specialist provision to where they are supposed to be living than Manchester.
60- 75 mins in a taxi is what usually happens, after you have been to/ threatened a tribunal that is.

Yes I do agree that more battles with the authorities, education, health, benefit system etc would help the programme. I could supply the writers with a fair bit of material there.

Me again... soz!!

Watched the episode again... I love my godson and want to take in stuff which relates to him....

...but....

The record shop scene :( Even if she didn't know he was on the spectrum...why the flirting? As a mum who apparently didn't seem to be unhappy or dissatisfied with her personal life?

I can't fathom it. And adding that to her remark that he/she/all were to some extent broken ... well ....

I cant get my head round it... but am willing to defer to anyone with more direct experience than me... I'm a non-parent with a godson with these challenges....

And I hope my takings from the programme will be of help... these are the takings of someone with a vague/semi-certain knowledge of autism....completely not a specialist though...
The comments I've made are things that really disonnated with me ]
xx

Tonight's episode hit home for me.

Didn't get the flirting with the record guy. I did think " Is he Autistic?" but the show didn't dig deeper into that.

Their journey to and fro from the specialist unit resembled mine and DS's journey to school. I just don't have a car !

I wonder if anyone noticed the dynamic between the mum, dad and the sister's lives revolving around Joe and his needs. Even when Joe's grandad told the mum "......everyone has responsibilities you know...". Highlights...well to me, as a mum of child who has special needs..is my life revolved around my DS, am I neglecting my needs/ dreams ?

Did feel for the boy having a meltdown ? When DS has his, I do wonder what's going through his head at that precise moment.

Surely they would have attempted a 1:1 LSA in his current school first?!

He did Joe had a 1:1 LSA at the mainstream school.

With the flirting, I thought she was just mucking about.

She went in for a song.
He teased her (which she could have done without), and kept mentioning his girlfriend.
So (when she came back?) she turned the tables I thought?

Maybe I'm misremembering.

I thought she was just mucking about too.
I think you are all too harsh on the Mum. It's the Dad I can't warm to!

Did anyone else cheer when Eddie told his wife that he was seeing someone?

I dislike the Dad this time round but the Mum is a bit peppy now. Maybe showing a bit more grief and what it’s like for the parents. Even a mention of battling the lea to get specialist provision would have been good. I appreciate the older boy Mark as he is giving a realistic look into how parents struggle to work, the meltdowns etc. I warmed a bit more after the last one but disliked series 1 but will keep watching.

"The aunt and her vicar-father irritate me".

Yes.

Is he supposed to bring a bit of comedy?

As for the Aunt.

She's horrible!

How Eddie stuck her without the affair is beyond me!

I'm also wondering if there will be an affair between Sophie(?) & Paul.

Hope not-bit cliched!

I was going to put that she's far too young for him-but she seems to be only 4yrs younger!