Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Telly addicts

Cutting Edge: Pram Face

199 replies

VanishingLadyAppears · 11/08/2006 09:49

Monday 9.00pm channel 4

I'm definitely watching this and I hate to admit it but years ago i was infact one of those ignorant people who thought young girls had babies to get houses, benefits etc etc. I saw the clips for the show and felt so sorry for the girl who was upset about her child living in a cold house, but i suppose there are going to be folk who say you made your bed lie in it. This is going to be a very interesting and sad watch

OP posts:
chocybickie · 16/08/2006 21:39

I lived like this too.
Horrible. Completely demoralising.
When my son was a week old I went to wash his moses basket bedding and found a line of thick mould covering it due to the damp conditions. Our clothes and carpets were ruined. When you live like that with nothing to look forward to, when you are totally on your own with no transport or money and expectant little eyes on you ready to be entertained there is little but those faces to keep you going.
I smoked. I'm glad I did. What else did I have exactly?
No one to talk to, nothing to do but go to the park 2, 3 times a day, every day. Horrible, horrible, horrible.
I couldn't face watching the programme.

Beetle73 · 16/08/2006 23:34

Chocybickie, how awful for you. Sorry you had to go through that. I hope (I assume), that you're in a better situation now.

expatinscotland · 16/08/2006 23:46

'When you live like that with nothing to look forward to, when you are totally on your own with no transport or money and expectant little eyes on you ready to be entertained there is little but those faces to keep you going.'

Although I am an immigrant here, my experience has been that the degree of housing inequality and social isolation here is a MAJOR cause of this society's ills.

When my DD1 was born, we lived on a very deprived estate, so I know how you feel.

And how those girls feel.

Like you let them down.

That kind of sadness is terribly hard to qualify.

And then all you hear is how it's ALL your fault for having htem in the first place.

Talk about kicking someone when they're down!

fattiemumma · 17/08/2006 00:10

i agree.
i have heard so many people say "well why have a second child if she can't afford the first?"
ermm because in life shit happens.

i doubt anyone plans another child when in this situation but when accidents (however happy they are) what is the girl to do? terminate?? i am sure you would have plenty to say about that as well.

so what if she went out for a night. because hs4e is poor she should be miserable at home the entire time?

Pendulum - if you contatc your local HV or Homestart centre they are able to donate these items to the women they see. you could also try and contact your local womens aid refuge as many women who flee their homes leave with nothing (i know i did) and they are incredibly gratefull of items like this.

pendulum · 18/08/2006 06:47

thanks for the tip re Homestart, I will look into it.

UniSarah · 18/08/2006 22:15

You can try and find people to give stuff to but they don;t have to take it. IME chatting with other mums at our surestart centre, families living in poor houseing often have so little space to store anything that clothes and baby kit isn't passed around as it can;t be stored, people buy what they can when they need it and if its broken its chucked out. As someone willing to clean and mend and store things I have been passed on up all kinds of stuff for our lad from families who are probadly worse off than us.

chocybickie · 18/08/2006 22:38

i agree.
we got given so much stuff that it was a hinderance.
we needed heating, help with practical things that 16 year olds know nothing about, i desperately needed company. things that can't be provided by strangers. but you get by. it made me a better and more thankful person for it.

ameli · 19/08/2006 17:18

when i was watching this programme i really felt for those young girls. No one should have to bring up children in those awful conditions. It made me very very sad for both mothers and babys. i have grown up in a poor family and found that as a child never really had luxuries, i will say, that every single mother wants the best for her children, however in the long term comeing from a family who had very little has made me a better person. If i was one of those mothers i would also have been extremly offended by anyone pointing out the music system and questioning how i could afford it. At the end of the day we are all mothers and know how it feels to be judged, yet it's easy to take the moral high ground.

ChicPea · 19/08/2006 17:46

I didn't watch the programme as I knew it would be really sad but have read a few of the posts in this thread.

I am surprised that many of the postings express shock that there are people living in poverty and dire conditions in the UK. There has always been what has been termed as 'an underclass' whether you like the term or not. I am always surprised when people go on about Africa as being a third world country and starving, and keen on raising as much money as possible for those charities - who does the money reach? - etc and my attitude to that is 'I bet that within 5-10 minutes of your home you will find people living in abject poverty...'. Who do we help first, British citizens who live minutes from us or people on another continent?

Have I gone off on a tangent?

NattyandThomas · 19/08/2006 20:22

can i just say that even when u both work, you still have no money.
we couldnt afford to put the heating on this winter, and we live in a one bedroom flat (me my partner and baby) as we cant afford anything else.
we live on economy meats and reduced veg, and sometimes i have to hand wash clothes to save electricty...
the council wont house us as we work, and housing benifit wont give us any money towards a bigger place.
we are 20 and 21.. young to be parents maybe, but having kids are expensive, wether u are council or not.

charliecat · 19/08/2006 20:28

Natty, the council wont put you on a waiting list? You are overcrowded surely?
What about housing associations?

colditz · 19/08/2006 20:30

I think what might be helpful is a buddy system - not patronising, just someone with kids a similar age who does have a decently equipped home. by that I don't mean loaded, just normal

cos I personally would provide lunch every day for an adult and two small kids just to have someone to talk to and someone for ds to play with. He has too many toys and not enough company!

drosophila · 19/08/2006 20:47

So what do you think of the theory that the best way to tackle child poverty is to get these Mums back to work and the Child Tax Credit system being the way in which you can motivate and make it easier for these Mums to so it.

I know the Tax Credit system is far from perfect in it's execution and administration but the idea is to bump up earnings to a reasonable level as long as you work 18hrs (I think) a week. I noticed that at the end of the programme one of the women had got herself a job in a call centre (I think) and I truly hope that the money she get with a little help from tax credits helps move her out of poverty.

I would love to hear from people where the tax credit system has been a success.

charliecat · 19/08/2006 20:50

heres lots os storys where tax credits have made people worse off
And the thing about tax credits is you go back to work thinking you will be getting more money, then they tell you that they have over paid you by 1, 2, 3 ,4 grand and you end up in a worst state than you were in the first place

expatinscotland · 19/08/2006 20:57

'Natty, the council wont put you on a waiting list? You are overcrowded surely?
What about housing associations?'

Natty, I REALLY, REALLY feel for you, hon.

AND, empathies.

Charlie, in some places, like Edinburgh - the second most expensive place in the UK for cost of living in relation to income - the waiting list is a BIG joke.

How much of a joke here? Try over 157,000 sitting on it.

They sold over 200,000 properties in right to buy. NONE were allowed to be replaced.

Overcrowding. Haahaahaa. My social worker friend finally got a client re-housed. This lady has one leg. She was living in a 3rd floor one-bed flat with her husband and three children.

The only reason they finally got rehoused is b/c they were nearly murdered in a case of mistaken identity.

And where they are now, man, it's not nice. It does have a lift, however.

Another case in the paper in the past six months was a woman whose husband stabbed her multiple times. She was put on the priority list. Only to be offered a home in the same tower where he lived, on remand before his trial. She had to get her MSP involved to get her housed elsewhere. Then two weeks ago, the case of the disabled man stuck in hospital, fit to leave since November, w/no suitable accommodation available for him and his carer.

Edinburgh is a virtuoso at hiding its pockets of staggeringly deep poverty.

Yes, we both work and are always skint.

Tax credits? We racked up £3000 worth of debt to avoid becoming homeless after they cocked up, demanded repayment of 'overpayment' and left us to live on £13,000/pa. Before tax and NI. With a two-year-old.

And I was pregnant.

Only w/my MSP, MP, a welfare advisoer and GP intervening - b/c I had to go see a psychiatrist I got so depressed -were we able to sort it.

Imagine if we hadn't had the strength or will to fight?

charliecat · 19/08/2006 21:02

Didnt realise that were that many on the housing list!!!
So are they building new places? They are down here in the south east, theres no room for them, but they are building them, for every new housing estate so many are half rent/half mortgage and some are offered to those on the housing register. Not loads. But some.

expatinscotland · 19/08/2006 21:04

They're doing that here, charlie. But the demand is SO great it's like why bother.

Besides, it's ALL flat w/NO outdoor space here.

We walked about a mile and a half down the shore to the new development.

Just towers. Looks like a scheme in the making.

Fugly as all get out.

All flats.

Time to start looking at moving away for us.

expatinscotland · 19/08/2006 21:05

NONE is 'half rent/mortgage' affordable. Max is 30% here.

charliecat · 19/08/2006 21:17

Yeah, ive noticed what they are putting up here is stuff that in 10 years time people are going to be saying OMG its overcrowded and unhumane and we cant get a double bed in the bigggest bedroom, and theres no green areas, or anymore places in school etc, yet they keep building.

expatinscotland · 19/08/2006 21:20

Over 70% of the housing stock here is flats. Well over.

You should see the places they're throwing up here!

Ugly as sin, for one. Pokey, pokey, pokey.

There's just one built on the site of an old council tower that went to rack and ruin. Dunno where they rehoused all the occupants, but this one starts at £179,000 for 2 bed flat.

And it's in an 'okay' neighbourhood.

charliecat · 19/08/2006 21:26

if you click on site plan on this page they have sqqqquuueeezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzeeeeeeedddddddddd al these houses/flats/maisonettes on a piece of land that would take you less than 10 mins to walk round, at quite a speed Note the pink ones are socail housing.

expatinscotland · 19/08/2006 21:30

Wow! I see green! And edifaces that look surprisingly house-like. You'd be hard-pressed to find that here.

Here's what's going up here:

itaintallcastlesandhillspeeps

\linkwww.edinburghforthside.co.uk/\MOREFLATS!}

Yeah, I'd really want to live in a tower on a man-made bit of land in the middle of a Scottish firth/bay!

That sounds ace!

'If you don't like it, get out.'

Believe you me, we're working on it!

I'm an expat. A firm believer in voting w/the feet and walking the walk.

Even better to pay over £200,000 for the 'privilege' and 'opportunity'.

expatinscotland · 19/08/2006 21:31

sorry, here it is:

moreflats

charliecat · 19/08/2006 21:35

That green is on paper not in RL, in front of the houses shown is....a road...right on the doorstep. Like tickle your nose when you get the milk in ..right there road.
But, now ive looked at your link OMG, thats awful

expatinscotland · 19/08/2006 21:36

They're hideous!

We walked over there today just to see them up close.

Ghastly.

16 floors high, one of them.