Benefits street

[viagrafalls]

Anyone watching ?

[eslteacher]

I agree Nana, I get the impression Fungi is just unequipped to deal with life. wasn't he homeless before? Even if his benefits were taken away to try to motivate him, I think he'd end up on the streets again rather than that being a wake up call to 'pull himself together' and become a functional member of society.

Also, if being on benefits is a lifestyle choice...would any of us really choose to live like the people in this programme? If you had the choice to not work and receive benefits and a free house, but you also have to take the drug addiction/domestic abuse/learning disabilities/lack of motivation to clean your house/problem kids etc as part of that choice...who in their right mind would CHOOSE that FGS?

[Nancy66]

Fungi will be dead within five years.

All the heavy drinkers, drug abusers I have known have not made it to 50. That seems to be the age the body gives up.

[hickorychicken]

Very convenient

[JakeBullet]

An alcoholic man (sober for 20 years) once told me that breaking addiction has to come from within. I would imagine if you have a stable background that "something within" is far asker to find than if you have to deal with a life which is always non stable.

Not saying that people from unstable backgrounds don't get clean but I would imagine the cycle is harder to break.

[Grennie]

My boyfriend grew up on a street like this. The Council deliberately seemed to put them all together. It was full of people who struggled to cope with basic life. For example, the women over the road who was taken regularly to hospital by ambulance after another suicide attempt. My boyfriends mother who was an alcoholic and was bringing up 5 kids alone.

There are people who need massive support for ever, to have a reasonable life, or if tough measures are used such as eviction and withdrawal of benefits, will simply sink. My boyfriends mother would have sunk and ended up homeless until death.

I do think Dee is capable of much more and could be working with support to get into a job. But most people featured in this programme are never going to be able to hold down a job for long.

A friend who worked in the benefits office in the early 80's said they had an informal list of people that they knew were never going to be able to hold down a job. And they just left them alone.

[hickorychicken]

He had you didnt he? The ever giving good samaritan? Convenient that you made a big thing about this guy yet when someone pointed out that lets be realistic whos gonna give 3 vulnerable kids to An addict you had to say he was in a diff country. Meh. I could be wrong.

[hickorychicken]

Ok then i apologise.

[Grennie]

I also worked with a man who was a recovering addict who was in a supported job. He seemed capable on the outside, but was incredibly fragile. Any negative comment from a customer would leave him upset for days. Eventually he sunk into a depression and stopped getting out of bed. He was too fragile to cope with everyday life.

The resilience to cope with ordinary everyday life is I think developed in childhood. He hadn't learned that basic skill.

[salsmum]

I have seen the words 'selfish' and 'uncaring' posted here (although not directed at anyone in particular) I have been a carer since the age of 11 to my younger brother while my Mum worked her butt off.She was widowed (my Father died when I was 2). She had a mortgage to pay and in those days if a woman was on her own (for any reason) she got v.minimal help. I have been a lone parent for 12 years (9 yrs ago) when my disabled daughter was 7 and my DS was 11. I couldn't 'turn' to drink or drugs because I had responsibilities for my children not that I could afford to anyway. IF we are going to talk about selfish lets look at Fungi..he raised his son to the age of 3 and then CHOSE to take substances/drink alcohol leading to his son being adopted...that seems pretty selfish to me! Nana you mention Fungi has LD...I think if you have drug/alcohol habit for years that is what has messed his brain up not LD from birth I would imagine. After caring for my daughter for 25 years I'm getting a carers assessment soon feck knows why so if I come over as slightly unsympathetic please forgive me but I think Fungi comes over as very woe me when if you look at things logically he's done sweet F.A. to help himself.....Maybe in the passed he has 'forgot' to pick up his son and/or turned up to see him p*ed or out of his head....I think we are only seeing half of the reason why he was refused the visit...I'm sure if people had seen my alcoholic SF stumbling home people would have pitied him...His pockets would be empty from his 'addiction' and he would be spiteful and abusive to my Mum and my DB and I who weren't his fekin kids so I reserve my 'pity' for those who need care/help not through life choices.

[NanaNina]

Salsmom I understand your feelings and you have certainly had it tough but have managed to cope with some really difficult situations, and being a carer for your younger brother at aged 11 must have been hard for you, but I imagine you were quite a mature 11 year old. SO I ask myself why was it that you were emotionally and practically mature enough to care for your young brother, and I think this quality obviously came from your mother and the way you were parented by her.

You mention that you couldn't turn to drink or drugs when you were a single parent because you had responsibilities but the difference between you and some of the people on the programme is that you had been brought up by a caring mother I assume, and you were emotionally mature enough to know that when you became a single parent that it was your responsibility to do the best for your children, presumably in the way that your mother had done for you and your brother. There is of course the nasty SF you mention and his treatment of you and your brother must have had an adverse affect on you and could have left you with low self esteem. I sincerely hope that not too many years of your childhood were traumatic because of your SF.

I know it's difficult to understand but there really are some people who can't (rather than won't) cope with life on any level and this is always related to something traumatic in their childhood and/or because they have LDs or mental health problems. I thinkFungi is one such person - ok yes he made the decision to take drugs and abuse alcohol but people like him are trying to "buy themselves" a few hours of oblivion from the kinds of lives that they have. As riverboat said which one of us would choose to live like Fungi and in a filthy house. OK the drink and drugs may well have affected his functioning but I would like to bet he is illiterate and seems to be functioning like a young teenager (or younger) I think one of the things that I found in my work time and time again, is that there is almost always a really big gap between the chronological age and the emotional age of the Fungi's of this country. So whether he was born with LD or acquired them is a moot point.

We don't know at all that he brought his son up to the age of 3 years and I would seriously doubt this. There is a lack of clarity about Fungi's background and he probably can't remember himself.

I really hope that your carer's benefit is not affected and I think it is diabolical the way this govt is cutting benefits to disabled people and their carers, and blaming the poor and disabled for the deficit in the country. They didn't cause it, that was the greed of the bankers.

[hickorychicken]

I find you so patronising its painful nina. People have horrenndous childhoods but dont turn out like that, there does not have to be underlying reasons for everything.
Shooting drugs into his veins was a choice the first few times. Doing it now is a choice too since he is also taking methadone. Some people are junkies, some are not.

[NanaNina]

Aaaah would that I had your knowledge HC .........if only .....tell me where and how did you acquire such certainty about your fellow humans, and their motives for specific behaviours.

Just because I say that adults who are generally ill equipped to cope with life is because of something traumatic in their childhood and/or LDs or mental health problems doesn't mean all children who suffered trauma in their childhood will turn out this way. Indeed I think there are some people who make a conscious decision that they will treat their children better than they were treated.

"some people are junkies - some are not" wow such a profound statement. I'm glad you told me as I'd never have realised that.

Yes I know sarcasm is the lowest form of wit but to be honest I can't even be bothered to be annoyed by you, as you appear to be a very judgemental person with an intense dislike of anyone who opposes your fixed opinions.

[hickorychicken]

I am very judgemental and selfish, i am not ashamed to admit it. This whole thread is full of judging what we see. I would rather be like this than naive and stick my head in the sand. Or patronising people suggesting we are stupid and are not looking at the whole picture.

[Goldenbear]

I just found out today that my Mother lived on this street until she was 3 and actually lived in Fungi's house. My Mum's life is very removed from their existence and myself and my brother in particular is the other extreme to Fungi's life- how things have changed over the years!

[Grennie]

Bear an elderly man on the programme said it used to be a good street. It has changed dramatically

[Goldenbear]

Yes I think it was by all accounts- they lived with her maternal grandmother.

[marzipanned]

Sadly that's been the way with so many neighbourhoods across the UK. I wonder why that is, if these problems have been around for so many years.

I suspect the woman whose front patio had been so beautifully decorated for Britain in Bloom remembered quite a different James Turner street, too.

[marzipanned]

Holey why do you think that is? Given that these kinds of chaotic lives tend to be multi generational... I don't subscribe to the view that it's anything to do with current economic situation as (a) things have been deteriorating since well before the latest recession and (b) we had recessions throughout the 20th century, anyway. So is it that communities have become less cohesive? (Which doesn't seem to the case IME, nor from what's presented in this program) Or is it the council has tended to lump the more troubled families together?
Sorry...thinking out loud here!

[zizzo]

That sounds grim, Holey :(

Why aren't the Council stepping in and running youth clubs? Why aren't they holding free night classes or social events to promote community and cultural cohesion among the immigrants and locals? Why aren't they improving leisure facilities, and cutting rents on business premises to encourage trade to grow again in the area?

Grrr. It's going the same way in my hometown too and I despair of it.