'Bedlam'- ch 4 Next week (thursday)

[Tiredemma]

www.channel4.com/info/press/programme-information/bedlam

looks interesting - hope that it is an attempt to reduce stigma/raise awareness as opposed to possibly being a tv 'show' that people can mock and take the piss out of.

I wondered if it was real or not (mother shouting)?

I was hesitant about watching it as work in that sector but am pleased I did.

Kathryn agree it DOES take itstoll, but to call a child with a disability stupid is not on,

mine has things like this, yes ive lost my rag at times but never in afit of aaaaarrrrgggghhhh have I EVER called her stupid or wahtevr,

it hurt ME, and shes not my mother!

Erm. I get the impression you think I was excusing her behaviour which I find quite offensive after my previous post sharing about my own family.

Kathryn apologies if you took that the wrong way,, I was actually agreeing with you, in that it takes it toll.

I didn't for a minute think you were excusing it.

Kathryn just read your last post too and the way you decribed your parents and the fact they never spoke to you like that.

agree it DOES take itstoll, but to call a child with a disability stupid is not on,

This is the part that I took exception to. It came across as if you think I'm not aware it's not on to do that just because I explained why she had. I just wanted to clarify that I know it's not on to do that especially, as I already said, if my family had said stuff like that to me when I was ill, I wouldn't be alive anymore. Just don't want people thinking I would defend that kind of behaviour :(

I watched this nearly in tears.
those poor people, OCD is an awful debilitating illness and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.
so glad James got well.

I remember when dd2 was a baby, I was sitting in the chair feeding her - she was being perfectly good, perfectly well behaved and I suddenly thought 'what if I just bash her against the fireplace', or throw her?' I had no intention of acting on it of course, but I discussed with friends who said they too had the odd completely irrational urge. It's frightening but I think not uncommon.

watching this at the moment but not entirely sure why, far too many memories, have been in a psych ward 17 years ago

watching it though makes it feel like yesterday, maybe I am silly watching it?

yes that is what I felt, a real need to watch it, sad to see though that things haven't changed in 17 years, that could have been the psych ward I was on. MH is still very much a taboo subject

I think James' mother in episode 1 very bravely released an earlier recording and I would imagine most parents in that position at times do shout at the child.

On episode 2 last night it was sad to see the family with 4 children and the impact there too.

It is very helpful of those who have agreed to be in it that they let themselves be filmed which will help lots of others realise more about mental illness.

The man who attempted suicide twice made me :(
His daughter saying she didn't want him to come home from the hospital. It must have a huge impact on the me patient's families.

I really felt for that whole family. They obviously loved each other, but that wasn't enough for him. Such a sad and stressful case.

Just caught up with both episodes. Very moving particularly the man who was suicidal. At first I thought the daughter was being a bit precious saying she did not want him home but she is very young and teenagers find their parents embarrassing even when they are acting normal so it must have been very, very hard for her. Thought it was very insightful when the wife said his happy, wild, free spirit was was one of the things she liked about him but what you can get away with when you are young but not when you are 45
Going back to the OCD episode I think a lot of us have the intrusive thought but don't take much notice of them it's when you start getting totally pre occupied with them. I often worry I am going to laugh when someone is telling me something serious, going to say something when it is supposed to be silent or post an inappropriate comment after someone has put a daft or indulgent comment on Facebook. I have not yet though!

I surprised myself by being intensely annoyed with the man with the 4 childfren. I thought his wife was under-reacting to all that had happened- and totally glossing over how traumatised her children were. I found the girl saying she wanted him to stay in hospital very moving- as she wanted to keep her father safe instead of the constant worry he was going to relapse again...

I was worried about the sister who didnt say anything. Poor loves. Poor chap, he didnt want to feel that way.

Yes, Still. That's the trouble. Whilst we always have sympathy for the person who is sick (the father of 4) I never think enough is said about the impact on the family and how in some cases sadly for the good of 5 others it might be better in bad cases if he were not around in the home anymore. I am not saying that is always so but I know someone who excluded her husband on his latest release from a secure unit and I am certain it is the right decision for the family (and it is the man I know - friend of a friend not the wife so if I was going to be biased you'd expect it to be in favour of him). It can be a very very selfish disease, not something people are responsible for but ruining lives of others without the capacity to give to the family. Very difficult.

It is really horrible isn't it - mental illness can devastate the lives of whole families and you are right, the whole family should be considered in the treatment plan.

You are right- the family should be an integral part of any treatment plan, they can be crucial in Recovery and in keeping someone out of hospital.

Where I work we encourage our service users to develop a 'plan' prior to discharge which is then shared with family/gp/ any other person deemed necessary to aid the recovery.

All to often service users are just discharged from hospital with no stringent plan in place and unsurprisingly, things fall apart.

Another friend took to bed for months (depression) given the strain his (not hers) affair had on his marriage. He used to call for an ear to listen and I did listen and I hope I helped, but in the back of my mind was the thought - what about your poor wife - her life thrown apart by your affair and indecision (he left her in the end) and you have gone and taken to your bed for 4 months with severe depression. How very convenient whilst she has to do everything. I didn't say that but it was vastly unfair on her that his misconduct led to his breakdown and leaving her to deal with everything.

The man in question clearly wanted to go home though didn't he? I don't think it would be right personally to not let him come home if he wanted to. It is very hard on a family if a person gets sick regardless of whether its a mental or physical disease such as cancer. My father had a breakdown and was on tranquillisers and did not work again. His moods were hard to live with but he was my dad it was his home.

I am not sayuing it's at all easy but if you've suffered 20 years as my friend's wife had of a husband who is up and down and all over the place and breaking things and making the children's lives a misery when he was at his worse that you decide the end is there - you cannot go on in the marriage then I am afraid sometimes even just for the physical safety of the children is can be the right decision to divorce (despite the better for worse promises). Not easy for anyone. I think what most annoyed me about those two cases I knew was that the person who was ill when better seemed to make no effort to make up to their spouse - they didn't say okay I'm feeling better now and I realise you had 100% of the cleaning sand childcare and earning and I was horrible to you even though I did not realise it so now I'm going to do 80% of all of the worst stuff at home to make up for it. In stead they just thought it could be brushed under the carpet under some kind of heading that they had been ill so it could all be forgotten.