Anyone watching Growing Up Poor?

[besmirchedandbewildered]

On BBC3 now.

Tough times, and they are so young :(

Totally agree impty, think Gixer would have a great deal to offer in a 1:1 situation - experience, knowledge and (by the sounds of it) lots of energy.

I meant to watch it but missed it Pleased its getting good reviews here. Some people think poverty is a thing of the past. There is always plenty of poverty.

gixer you say the country can't afford to counsel/support young people like the girls in the program. well i'm sorry but we bloody have to if this country stands any chance of breaking the cycles that leave so many of them all struggling on benefits. they aren't a different breed. they are our breed. our children. children that in a few years will be responsible for the decisions that affect your old age and what care will be available for you. we need to invest in these children.

Watched it on iplayer last night. Really felt for all 3 of the girls. Bridie hasn't been parented much at all by the sounds of it and is so angry. I just wanted to look after her and Shelby as they are so vulnerable and alone and both have such potential. It made me wish there was something I could do to help them and just be there to listen and help them keep themselves on track. Their lives are so joyless and hard.

Morris24: "A paper round pays £20 a week, approx £2 an hour to line someone elses pockets..theres no pride in that and its not going to get her anywhere. I think Bridie is more intelligent than you and is not willing to be exploitated? "

No, Bridie is just lazy. A paper round is a few hours each morning for £20 in your pocket. It's all about CHANGING your mindset to be more proactive and to start some sort of work ethic. She could be a glass collector in a pub, she could volunteer for any number of charities who need people to work for them, it doesn't HAVE to be a paper round. It's all about building up some "ammo" so that when you go for any sort of job, even if it's a low paid one in the first instance, a list of various jobs you've done or things you volunteered for, tells employers "I got off my arse and was proactive and didn't just sit around". I'd not have got the job as a programmer if I'd not got of my arse and learned HTML and then built websites for people on the side, that was my "ammo" and it landed me the job I wanted.

A paper round would mean getting up early and out for a specific time, doing a job with some semblence of pride, and getting some cash at the end of it. Not just staying in bed because you feel that a paper round is an insult not worth getting up for. Shelby was paid a pittance for her shelf stacking but she still got up and did it rather than stay in bed. If I was employing any of these kids as part of a scheme to give them a leg up and one of them said that they did a paper round or a job like Shelby did, I'd totally employ them over the Bridies of this world who CBA to do one single thing to get any money.

Booyhoo: "the country can't afford to counsel/support young people like the girls in the program. well i'm sorry but we bloody have to if this country stands any chance of breaking the cycles that leave so many of them all struggling on benefits."

I agree, but tell that to the people in power. It's all very well saying "yeah we have to do this and we have to do that" but where will the funding come from? The programme said that there are 300,000 youngsters claiming Govt money, and if they averaged that out at £8 a day that's £2,400,000 per day - which would go a long way to provide schemes and support for these people, but they need money on a daily basis to eat and live. Or in the case of some of these girls, smoke. And if there WERE more schemes to help these girls get motivated and get some training, they still have to GET OUT OF BED and come along each week, and WANT to do it, and have that passion and enthusiasm to at least TRY. I say again, lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink. The Entitled Generation wants the best of everything without working for it.

Get a voucher system going that is paired with an ID card, so the money given to them can be used for food, utilities, baby gear and other essentials only - with a small amount of cash for "other things". The ID card would stop them selling vouchers to others in exchange for cash that they'd spend on God knows what. And if they wanted more cash well, start job hunting....

voucher system for all benefit claimants?

Actually Gixar, I would hate to be given vouchers. ....its already bad enough having to give an NHS exemption card for prescriptions. I already feel judged enough quite honestly.

No what IS required are adult mentors for the Bridies of this world. Born to a mother addicted to crack she is exhibiting all the behaviours of someone not pulled out of her abusive environment as a child.

I watched this and was really moved by Shelby. I am going to try to find a way to sponsor her. I know it's only helping one person, but it beats sitting around doing nothing....I wouldn't donate cash.....maybe food vouchers or baby stuff.....I'm going to contact the BBC to see if they can help me with this and forward my donation and message of support on to her.

Just caught up on iPlayer

Shelby was so lost and lonely.

I can't sponsor any of the girls but it has helped me decide to see if Homestart will have me as a volunteer. I've been thinking about contacting them for ages but this has given me a boot up the bum. I've got a grown up DD who is getting married and has lots of support, a good job etc but so much depends on which bed you're born into in life. I would really like to be there for someone going through a tough time not because I'm paid to but because I want to help out a bit. I keep thinking about those girls and how rudderless and hard things are for them.

I feel so sad for Shelby that after working hard for a pittance there was no job for her at the end. Working for £1 odd an hour when she had to get the bus there is just awful.

The stories were all so sad but Bridie's story got to me the most....I got a sense from the other two that there was either a parent around or their inner resources were strong. Bridie had neither of those things and is evidently growing up from an abusive childhood (mother addicted to crack etc), you can just see she is going to end up in more and more trouble .

Shelby's story was so sad...now is it right in this day and age that she was in a flat with nothing and had to appeal after being turned down for a community care grant. Even then it just stretched to a bed, a fridge and a microwave. It was heartbreaking seeing the bare floorboards....and even after working for 6 months she had nothing...not even the price of a cheap carpet for her living room. Dreadful.

Zukie that is just unacceptable! No change in the policy in 85 years? How on earth can they justify that? I feel I need to do something about that. Maybe a petition to have it reviewed.

I got the impression that Bridie is suffering from a mental disorder - another example of being 'maintained' through school with no-one addressing the real problems. Her mum is an addict and couldn't look after her, and obviously has huge psychological problems herself. To say Bridie's childhood was fucked up is an understatement. She has a temper that she can't control. Her problems are manifold, a product of genetics and her disfunctional upbringing.

I imagine (I may be wrong, of course) that she was excluded and/or played truant at school, which must have detrimental effect on learning how to deal with the world (e.g. ability to concentrate, turning up for appointments, work ethic, respect for authority, etc.)

She had no idea about money, or the cost of things, was glue-sniffing and unable to see beyond the next hour. And she was only 17.

Bridie's story is so depressing (and distressing) - her utter ignorance of how to live within the boundaries of our society. Who will teach her how to conform?

Now that's an even more depressing question, because my guess is that she will get absolutely no help from anyone......ever.

Big Society my arse.

I find it fascinating in these programmed that they all know what they're entitled to and never stop to think where the money actually comes from, ie. the rest of us working and paying taxes. I felt for Shelby as she really seemed to be doing her best to help herself. I was disappointed to read at the end that she was pregnant. Why, oh why, would she do that?

I missed the back story on the pregnant girl. Was her mother working? Was there a boyfriend on the scene? God, teen pregnancy is a scourge isn't it? Maybe there's a case for compulsory contraceptive implants... I know, I know, it's their human rights...

Bridie just seemed so incurably troubled. How do you fix that damage? She was so sad and apathetic.

I have to admit I had my judgey pants on when I first watched it, but the stories really moved me.

Seeing a teen get excited about a carpet, and another excited about making a bit of soup really hit hard.

These girls have very few positive role models in their lives, so where would they start.

And yes they shouldn't be smoking, but they also shouldn't be worrying about budget shopping and cooker cables either.

"I find it fascinating in these programmed that they all know what they're entitled to and never stop to think where the money actually comes from, ie. the rest of us working and paying taxes."

ask yourself honestly that if you were living off £8 a day would you have space in your head to worry about, let alone feel guilty about where the money came from?

i am a LP on benefits. beleive me i know where that money comes from. i have it drummed into me every time i come on MN or open a paper or switch the tv on. all i hear these days is "tax payers' money" "benefits scroungers" that is me they are talking about so believe me i know where the money comes from. that doesn't change the fact that right now i have no other choice. i cant give up the benefits until i have found work. do you think those girls should walk around with a placard on them thanking tax payers' for enabling them to eat?

These are girls abandoned to the system tbh. Obviously Amber has her Mum who seemed lovely and supportive. How sad though that she was pregnant at such a young age.

What will happen to the Shelbys of this world when housing benefit is stopped for the under 25s?

And yes the CCG is ridiculous. ..she needed everything. There does indeed need to be a protest regarding the rules governing it. Likewise it needs to be available to women and children fleeing domestic violence.

Am sad but not surprised to see she was pregnant at the end of the programme. She seemed very sensible though and I can see her doing well in life.

Shelby talking about drinking coffee to stave off hunger just killed me

Shelby's situation is disgusting. 10 months with no cooker etc. if she was a care leaver she'd have all that

I felt for Amber's mum. Older and wiser and still helpless to change her situation.