protecting our children

[thekidsrule]

carry on please

They will have such a sense of abandonment. Toby will never be adopted.

I don't understand why we don't have open adoptions in the uk.

there is no way on earth I could do that job!!
hats of to social workers

Don't think that was the right decision. She loved them, with support and encouragement she should have been given the chance to try again on her own and been monitored to see if she could have managed imo.

He's never going to be adopted- I'm actually quite angry now.

One of the saddest things I've ever seen.
Poor Toby
Poor Tiffany

Who the feck makes the decision to split them up?

Surely the new parents of baby girl must have known of older SN brother

Its a series. There was a five second clip at the end of the parents in the next episode

I am hoping that maybe as a result of the programme they may be able to place Toby with a family. That last screen info was unbearable.

He'd have a brother his age here and a big brother and a baby sister.

there is another programme is what i mean

Think about it though, who would take on a newborn and a 4yr old with sn ? I think it was better that they were seperated, for both of them.

Sob, sob, sniff. Poor Toby, poor Tiffany. What a heartbreaking decision.

If it had just been her and Toby I think the outcome would have been different.

She had been given 3 years chance with Toby. So there was already enough evidence to remove the little girl even if she had not consented to adoption.

I think that if she had not had a baby SS would have given her more support to keep Toby because he was so hard to place. BUt very hard to remove a baby and leave another child.

So Toby is the biggest casualty of the whole affair.

That is not a criticism of SS. I just think its the way it goes.

Poor poor kids - and there are thousands like them we don't know about.

Brave and right decision (IMO) by Tiffany - she knew she couldn't look after her children.

So sad - makes me want to go and wake mine and give them a cuddle.

I'm crying from watching this :(

She most definitely made the right decision. If only more parents were able to see and accept that sometimes they simply cannot do the job of parenting and offer their children a much better future. I think she's wonderful for being able to do that.

Unfortunately though, the little boy will probably suffer many years in the care system. I didn't quite grasp what his problems were. Does he have a medical condition or is he behind in terms of development because of the neglect and lack of interaction from his parents?

Of course, the cameras probably film what they want, but it was lovely to see him turn from such an angry little boy into much happier child.

But SS HAD been giving them support and nothing was changing? I don't think she would have coped on her own with even one child.

Toby is likely to stay in Foster until he is able to talk clearly and fully toilet trained.
Waiting a year and stabilising who he is will probably be for his long term benefit.

Interesting that she gets to write to them twice a year until they turn 18.
Presumably they will be told about each other at some stage but will grow to understand that being treated as individuals will be important.

The fact that the dad talked about the six babies who had not lived spoke volumes about the physiological issues both children will face.

I so hope Toby gets the love he deserves. Harrowing, i have a pain inside.

What a decision to have to make. I can't help but think if the dad hadn't been around, and Tiffany would have had good support, they could have made it as a family.

The children split up, so sad. The older i get the greater my capacity for pain.
I don't think i'll watch again.

OMG, wish I had had my PC when I was watching this....

I HATED the meddling social workers. I feel so angry. Poor poor poor Toby, poor poor poor baby and poor mum - how terrible to be badgered to the point where you feel your only option is to adopt because you are not a good enough parent.

Where is the help for the parent? Creating a list of tasks and leaving it with them? Are you joking?????? Why not invest some of time clearly spent pen pushing and office politicking in spending time with the mum, upping her parenting skills. Where are the classes to support her?

Observing Toby, why not get involved instead of just judging?

God, I am so f'ing angry about this.

I do worry Tiffany will be lost in the system now she is off the child protection radar, who will help her? Very difficult to watch, very brace decision I hope she gets proper long term help not just passed from one person to another if at all.

If he isn't placed, can tiff get him back if she improves?

They were given help oneliein. They bought a bed for Toby and the parents didn't even take it out of the wrapper. They were told exactly what to do to keep the house clean, and yet they didn't do it.

Tiger are you kidding me...

"If only more parents were able to see and accept that sometimes they simply cannot do the job of parenting and offer their children a much better future. I think she's wonderful for being able to do that."

Where is our responsibility as a society to teach people parenting skills? To help people become parents? there is no "simply cannot do the job" - it is a series of complex skills that people learn.

She is not wonderful, she is clearly heartbroken