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Original poster

A Home For Maisie

75 replies

alwaysaskingquestions · 11/04/2011 21:05

Trying to watch this programme but unfortunately I'm being distracted by the nose hair.

OP posts:
MarionCole · 11/04/2011 21:06

I think this is going to be tough going

hellamallella · 11/04/2011 21:15

I think so - she is so damaged - poor little girl :(

paulapantsdown · 11/04/2011 21:43

these people are amazing
its pretty crap though that people who take on EIGHT damaged children, love them and give them a future, get no financial help

Alambil · 11/04/2011 21:54

it is totally amazing - the family, the therapists... poor, broken Maisie :(

I hope she finds peace one day, I really do

ThatVikRinA22 · 11/04/2011 21:57

i am heartbroken for that little one, but her adoptive family are so amazing. they deserve medals.

i cannot believe that social services cant fund family therapy for 3 years at 15k a year but would put her in a secure home for children who cant fit into family life at £290.000 a year. madness, absolute madness.

they could make the difference in that little girls life,

MarionCole · 11/04/2011 21:59

Wonderful people

ThatVikRinA22 · 11/04/2011 22:01

im so glad they adopted her. im sat here blubbing like a baby. jeez.

Alambil · 11/04/2011 22:02

me too, vicar

they have a calling. You can't train people to be like that - they are unique.

auntpetunia · 11/04/2011 22:04

that poor little girl, the things she has been through in her young life.. I thought those people where amazing how much all the other children loved them. Social Services should give them the funding for as long as they need it, up to the amount of the secure unit.

franke · 11/04/2011 22:06

What Vicar said re funding. We seem to see this skewed thinking about funding across the whole issue of care and adoption (I'm thinking of Riven's case too).

I'm so glad they took a chance on Maisie. What an amazing couple. Very humbling.

franke · 11/04/2011 22:07

And the other kids they had adopted were so lovely.

Original poster
alwaysaskingquestions · 11/04/2011 22:08

We need more of them in society - they were fantastic.

I was shocked that they get no funding, they should at least get carers allowance, but I agree with you auntpetunia, they should have funding of a place at secure unit, because they are doing a much better job.

OP posts:
BellaMagnificat · 11/04/2011 22:13

What a truly amazing couple. Oh God I hope they get the support long term that they all need to help her heal.

The cost of the therpay is as nothing when compared to the cost not just of the secure unit place but the likely permanent damage that would inflict.

How utterly cruel that one of the other mummys who she was closest too collapsed before her eyes when she was only 4 and was rushed off to hospital, resulting in a change of home. That alone - quite apart from the other unspeakable things she has seen and endured in her short life - would have been enough for a lifetime of emotional disturbance.

Good luck Maisie and my utter admiration to your amazing new family.

lilolilmanchester · 11/04/2011 22:24

what an amazing family, and shocking that it's so hard to get funding for the therapy, which is a fraction of the alternative secure placement. It would be great if this programme could help bring a bit of logic to those proceedings.I really hope it works out, of course primarily for Maisie who deserves some consistency and security, but also for the parents who put me to shame

ViolaTricolor · 11/04/2011 22:54

I was doubtful about filming children in this situation, where they are so identifiable, but the whole family were amazing. I was also sobbing when they adopted her. I was very touched by the other children; they were such a testament to their wonderful parents, and so eloquent and clear-sighted about what adoption had meant to them.

anyachaika · 12/04/2011 07:28

I feel it is important to point out that the practice shown in the documentary seems to be a version of a a controversial practice known as Holding Therapy or Attachment Therapy. A first-hand account of this can be seen at anyachaika.wordpress.com/2011/04/05/a-first-hand-account-of-holding-therapy-in-the-uk/
The blog also contains discussions and a history of HT in the UK

anyachaika · 12/04/2011 07:33

I feel it is important to point out that the practice shown in the documentary seems to be a version of a controversial practice known as Holding Therapy or Attachment Therapy. A first-hand account of this can be seen at

anyachaika.wordpress.com/2011/04/05/a-first-hand-account-of-holding-therapy-in-the-uk/

The blog also contains discussions and a history of HT in the UK

SaggyHairyArse · 12/04/2011 09:27

I am in awe of the parents, real life angels. What an amazing family!

ThatVikRinA22 · 12/04/2011 12:14

anyachaika - i dont think they were using anything like what is described in your article!!!

they did not hold her down and force her to do anything.

when she became violent or aggressive (and her mum certainly got the brunt of that) she simply restrained her in a non violent way. Was she supposed to just get bitten and spat at and hit? in the documentary i saw, (i say that because we were either watching two different things or you havnt watched it) they never pushed Maisie into anything - she needed to speak about what had happened to her, only AFTER they had gotten to the point in therapy where she actually talked about what had happened to her did the aggression and violence stop. it helped her. she needed to talk and ask questions, and i dont think they ever forced the issue - it came about quite naturally throughout the course of therapy.

she carried on asking questions about her birth family in the car after the sessions had finished.

That little girl had been subjected to, and witnessed, the most appalling violence from the day of her birth. At 8 years old she was coming to terms with that.

i think what your suggesting happened from that article is, quite frankly, bollocks.

go and troll somewhere else.

ThatVikRinA22 · 12/04/2011 12:21

www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b010fq2d/A_Home_for_Maisie/

its on iplayer for anyone who missed it or for anyone who would like to see that anya is talking rubbish.

anyachaika · 12/04/2011 12:32

I would be glad if people watched the programme again carefully and then did some research into Holding Therapy - wikipedia (on holding therapy) for example gives a very thorough account . Most clear thinking people may well be completely shocked by what they find. I just think we should sometimes question the way things are presented

ouryve · 12/04/2011 12:32

I blubbed all the way through the program. My heart was breaking for poor Maisie. No child should have to endure what she's gone through :(

I have a child with ASD who has protracted meltdowns, but not even half as intense and violent as Maisie's were and it is such a difficult and exhausting thing to deal with - Maisie's mum and dad are pretty special people to see the child through the behaviour.

ouryve · 12/04/2011 12:35

Anyachaika - you're making huge assumptions about the type of therapy that maisie was undergoing. And of course, wikipedia is a well known accurate and unbiased resource for everything, which only experts are able to add to and edit. Not.

anyachaika · 12/04/2011 12:52

Ouryve, If you don't feel that Wikipedia is reputable then perhaps it would be useful refer to The British Association of Adoption and Fostering (Position Statement 4). This article, which effectively calls for Holding Therapy to be banned, can be found at www.baaf.org.uk/webfm_send/2066

I think the onus is on us to look into a highly intrusive treatment that is not scientifically proven and without meaningful governance. We are paying for it out of our taxes after all

ThatVikRinA22 · 12/04/2011 12:58

stop harping in about holding therapy when this was clearly clearly NOT the therapy being used in this programme!

i have a 19 yr old son with autism - at times, he needed to be restrained during a tantrum or he would have hurt himself, its not "therapy" - its stopping a child from punching your lights out.

the therapy sessions on this programme are there for all to see and im watching it again - maisie is walking around, on the floor drawing, playing with toys - she isnt being held in any way.

the times that she is laying on her mum and dad on the couch she is free to get up and go - her mum even starts to cry and says" im not touching you" - the child in this film has issues with being touched when she feels sad and has issues around mums because she had 10 of them in 4 years.

you really are talking rubbish - there is no holding therapy in this film.

what were they meant to do? her parents i mean - just let her kick shit out of them? they went on to successfully adopt her, the therapy was working and ensured that child a normal life with a secure happy family.

you are way off beam on this and using this programme and thread to hijack it with your own agenda.