How to get on child’s iPhone without password or deleting the photos?

You can't.

Doesn't Snapchat delete once sent? (That's my knowledge limit, I'm 👵🏻)

I don’t know how you can. But just to say that if the photos have been taken/sent in Snapchat they won’t necessarily be in her camera roll on her phone unless she has specifically saved them. And they won’t even appear in the chat within Snapchat unless her or the recipient have saved them.

You can't. Just take the phone off her.

Unless she saved the snap chat photos they won’t be there anymore.

unfortunately many teenagers do this sort of idiotic thing and then live to regret it. For me it would be no more phone use until they can prove they have matured. Part of that would be sharing what she’s done with the appropriate authorities and allowing you to closely monitor her phone use once allowed it again. If she won’t then no phone, ever.

Why won’t they believe you if you just tell them?

Because she’s a teenager and doesn’t want her mum snooping around in her phone?

but due to how she’s acted she’ll have to put up with it for the time being at least. If she won’t give you access then she can’t have it back. Simple.

Maybe she doesn't want you to see who she's sending snaps to or to see snaps and messages before she gets a chance to look. so if you log in and a there's a dick pic then there's a high probability that it's a person that she sends pics to.

There is an area of Snapchat where you can save pics but the default is set to disappear after you send.

Take her phone off her
Delete reset and set up a screen time passcode so she can't change the settings, passcode, or use Snapchat or down load any apps without your permission. Or even use safari

I just did this on my dc I pad it's really easy to do.

Just take the phone away from her? I don't really understand the issue if you say she doesn't normally have a phone anyway but that you keep trying to wean her back onto it in the hope that she realises how dangerous it is? If she has been sending these pictures for years (which is pretty shocking given that she is only 13 now) and you keep giving her the opportunity to do it again why is she going to learn from that? Why not just tell her she is not Getting the phone back until she at least tells you what the current password is?

When she does get her phone back reset it and put it on family sharing with you as head of the family. She will need your permission to download anything so won’t be able to sneakily snap chat anyone as she won’t be able to download snap chat.

Is it a password or does she have thumb/face biometric lock? If it's the latter then you could unlock it when she's asleep.

Moral and ethical arguments on whether it's right to do are for you to work through.

Does she ever access her iCloud/apple account on her computer? If yes her password may be saved to her computer internet browser.

If you fog up the phone screen, can you see oil marks on the screen where she has repeatedly pressed the same letters/numbers/shape for the password. That might give you a hint on what password she's chosen.

If you get past this then you really need to do a better job of sorting parental controls on that phone. If you have an iPhone too then you can set up your DDs as being part of your family, and can control pretty much all aspects including preventing her from changing the device password without you approving it and entering your password.

It depends in their individual settings.

A child instigating and sending nudes should be raising all kinds of red flags and for the possibility she's been abused. I'm shocked the people who are supposed to spot these red flags are being so dismissive and calling it a one off. It's not safe regardless and she clearly should not be weaned on to smart phone usage, but i would want to be sure she's not sending her photos to adults as well as peers.

You as the parent know your child has done this a few times already, did you not take time to find out the way around the phone and how to access it and apps should she do this again?

This really isn't healthy behaviour and you saying she's instigated it all over the last few years and support workers think it's only once is concerning. Does she have any diagnosis or is she attending any therapy to learn the root of what started it all? Did anything bug change in her life? It could be something that doesn't seem big to you but to a child is, like a parent meeting someone new and blending/extending/moving etc?

I think you need to make access to her phone a condition of having one at all. But a phone-free period for a while may make sense. Don't give it back unless she is prepared to have you accessing it whenever you choose. I told DD when she got a phone that this was the condition and that she could not install anything without asking me. In fact, I had also set up parental controls, but she didn't know that and I wanted to know that she would always ask me and we could have a conversation about risks/benefits when she wanted something. She still asks me most of the time, and she is almost 17 now.

With regards to support workers/school wanting to sign off I would put it in writing that you very much don’t agree that this is resolved and that they have a duty of care to your DD and if they go ahead and sign off without your agreement you will take it further.

Which authority has provided the support worker? Is she qualified to determine if your DD has any mental health issues? Who will be reading and actioning the report that she is writing?

A healthy and happy 13 year old would not be compelled to do this repeatedly. She clearly craves the attention and validation that sending this dangerous content brings her. You need to building her self esteem and I would say that she urgently needs some talking therapy. Do you think she would engage?

If you do get on her phone, make sure you have another phone handy. Apps like Snapchat can be set to delete any messages so if you don't photograph or record your DD's phone while looking, you will have no proof because the evidence will disappear.

Glad to hear you took the phone away. I think that is the right thing to do. I'm sorry these people are letting you down. I'd be complaining to someone in your shoes, I think. Yes, privacy, but sometimes that needs to be overridden in favour of safety IMO. 13 is far too young for unrestricted and unsupervised access to everything the internet holds and your daughter has absolutely proven that she doesn't understand the dangers.

My DD is the same age as yours and this breaks my heart. I’m glad you took the phone away, and I wouldn’t give it back to her for a very long time, I would probably be scared to ever give it back tbh, I would be cautious until she’s 18. She needs to show that she is using social media appropriately, and from what you’ve said there’s no doubt it will happen again if she is given free rein using the internet unsupervised or unmonitored. I would no longer trust her with social media. You really need to get to the bottom of the reasons why she feels the need to instigate and send inappropriate pictures, could there be any trauma or self esteem issues ect that’s causing her to need validation? I would go to the GP and ask for a referral to CAMHS.