How much monthly allowance do you give your teenager?

[mismomary]

Our eldest DD is 17 and in sixth form. Last year we started her on a monthly allowance but it's not working. She's really down about money, says she hasn't enough to buy Christmas presents for friends or clothes. We give her £80pm and pay for phone, gym, and basic toiletries. (Rule is if Tesco stock it she can have it). Clothes I buy the basics.

She's been trying to get a job but struggling, has applied to local pubs and supermarkets etc.

I'm starting to think we have got this allowance totally wrong and she should be on more like £200pm or more. We can easily afford this but don't want to be over generous as want her to learn to budget and value money etc But perhaps we've gone too far the other way.

I'd be grateful to know what you give. Maybe we are way off!!

It has to be in exchange for some work you need her to do. Don't just give her money.

My kids got 20 pound a week.
Until they got a job.
But it made them get a job.

I know the job market sucks currently

Can you give the money you want but find something for her to do

I think that, if you can afford it, you give her what you reasonably think she needs. I really don’t understand the ‘they need to earn it’ stance. Family money is for meeting the needs of all the family members - it’s mean to withhold money from teenagers just on principle. My DC are grown up now - I still help them out if I can see they need it. They’ve always worked hard , are genuinely grateful and haven’t taken anything for granted.

A job would be the ideal I agree, for her self esteem and to learn about money. And yes we could employ DD around the house etc, maybe that's a better temporary position.

They get £20 a week but we pay for phone, eating out with friends, clothes, car etc. they use the £20 for little treats really or save it to buy presents (we do give them money at Christmas to buy presents though). They have A Saturday job to top it up.

Young teen £50, older teen £100.
I buy all essentials so it's just fun money.
They do daily chores without nagging.

I think if you can afford to, give more. Realistically £20 a week doesn’t go far in 2025 if she’s using it for other day to day things, transport, food out, etc

I think if it’s affordable I would increase to £120 a month ie £30 a week. But she can earn an extra £50 ontop doing extra stuff at home like garden/ mow lawn/ clean car/ batch cook simple meals for family for freezer/ easy decorating

I would also probably give her extra one offs before Xmas/ one of your birthdays to buy any gifts

And in meantime help with job search

I must admit this reply makes me breathe with relief. I do feel we are holding back with her allowance to try and make sure she takes nothing for granted. But by doing this she seems less well off than her peers and genuinely struggling.

DS in Upper Sixth with no job gets £30 per week allowance. I buy necessary clothes but expensive things like trainers are Xmas/birthday presents. I also pay his termly county-wide travel pass, phone, toiletries, and driving lessons.

He can top up by babysitting his younger sister (£15 maybe twice a month), and tutoring her in a language he is good at (£7.50 weekly). £7.50 for lawn-mowing, general gardening or car washing. In a good month from his perspective that’s nearly £200 and he has enough money.

My 15 year old gets £100 a month, for that she has to babysit her sister when asked, usually 2/3 times a month. It covers clothes (not uniform, coats, shoes or undies) and toiletries, plus all fun money. We have a large tescos nearby I expect her to go and work in at 16!

None. They all have jobs. And as for jobs being paid for in the house? No. They live here therefore they chip in.

Ours have free bus travel (Scotland) and we paid for school lunches, some clothes etc but this way they have a better understanding of money than I ever did and will hopefully not end up in the same debt cycle I have.

Eldest two are currently paying their own way through Uni / rent / shared car etc I send an occasional supermarket shop / but the odd pair of trainers etc but that’s it.

DC3 will be expected to do the same.

I didn’t give my teens any money other than birthday and Xmas, they had to earn it.
We did pay for their phone and dinner money while at school/college. Basic clothes and toiletries we bought, anything else they paid for.

I'm so grateful for your replies and all the ideas of ways teen income can be topped up around the house. Decorating, tutoring and cooking one meal a week are great suggestions for us thank you.

We are going through her budget this morning. She's off to Christmas markets tomorrow and out for dinner with boyfriend tonight so very keen to get this sorted!

DD in year 11 gets £10 a week from us chore related and earns £15 a week from a small job she has. Grandparents also put £40 in her account each month so she had around £35 a week. I pay phone and gym and toiletries unless fancy expensive ones. One of her friends had a credit card from her dad and seems to be able to spend what she likes but the rest of her friends seem to be in a similar position to DD. I do give her some extra money to get Christmas presents but not loads.

Mine got £60 a week in sixth year which was supposed to cover any lunches not bought at school, his gym membership (fairly cheap) and haircuts as well as spending money. We paid his phone and bought most of his clothes / toiletries on top of that. So if you take out the gym membership and haircuts it probably did work out about the £200/month you are thinking about. He certainly didn’t seem to have any more money than most of his mates.

Dd £50 a week
Dsd £10 a week

edited to add differing amounts due to dd needing to cover more

It’s hard because £80 is a lot of money but everything is so expensive now!
Its £7 a pint where I live so with taxis her £80 is probably gone after one night out

Oldest is 15, she only gets £30 but we pay for everything anyway so it's mainly for odds and sods.

13 year old gets £20

Dd(18) and dd(16) - they both get £65 per month, and phones/gym/toiletries/most clothes/hobbies paid for.
Dd(18) has a well paid spring/summer job and cleans 2hrs a week for us in autumn/winter - she cleans well and I pay her as I would a cleaner.
Dd(16) also has a well-paid job so they’re ok with money.

Work has been so valuable to them - learning to work in a team, communicate with others and being treated as an employee has all benefitted them and increased their confidence so much.

Mine too! I couldn't afford £80-100 per child like a lot of these posts

I got £0 a month. I had a job from age 13. At 17, there’s absolutely no reason that she can’t get a job.

I don’t agree with pocket Money for normal
day to day chores, as yes every one in house contributes

But going beyond normal day to day like with extra cooking, or decorating or car or tutor makes sense as it’s a valid way they can choose to earn extra, whilst helping you out also.
My Ds is too young yet, and there’s no way I would pay him to hoover or laundry normal stuff.
But if he had option to wash and dry sort all curtains or actual duvets and cushions in summer , or deep clean sofa or batch make a load of soup for lunches, or help me organise paperwork for taxes, I would happily pay him extra for it especially if they are normally a helpful child and struggling for paid work.

Seeing them struggle to make a point isn’t a life skill. I would prefer they had spare money and could afford to help someone else out with time or money than miss out themselves

Does she need to pay for all social activities from her allowance? How often does she go out with friends, to the cinema, for coffee, for dinner, etc?

There is if there aren't any jobs to get. The OP said she's struggling to get a job

There are plenty of jobs about if she bothered to look

Bloody hell. I'm super mean as my dd gets 10 a week but we pay buses school food. Most clothes gym phone.

I dont pay for takeaways we don't eat together or nights out. Im trying to encourage him to get a job so the least money he gets the better.