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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Finances when child does an apprenticeship

55 replies

Welshmum2010 · 22/07/2025 21:22

I’d always thought my child would go to university and I’ve been saving up to help fund this. They are not starting an apprenticeship at 16. We are both very happy with this as it’s a great opportunity with prospects and will be better for them as they aren’t enjoying formal education. The slight issue I have is the financial side. I am a single parent and my child maintenance and benefit will stop. her dad pays the maintenance but has made it clear once that officially stops he won’t contribute Personnally. I want them to able able to keep all their wages for things they need and to save for car etc. however it will leave me a little short for bills etc. they will continue to live here for 3-4 years and I dont want them to have to contribute. They have An isa of several £1000 that will pay out at 18. I have savings that I was keeping for university in my name and they are not aware of how much this is. I feel guilty about dipping into this for monthly costs but it’s not needed for the original purpose. I think I can use a little and still have a lump sum to go with the isa. What would other parents do or have done in similar circumstances .

OP posts:
cestlavielife · 22/07/2025 21:23

It s your money. Use it.

BeMellowAquaSquid · 22/07/2025 21:25

Sorry if I’ve misread this are they or are they not starting an apprenticeship at 16?

Dearover · 22/07/2025 21:26

How short will you be each month? You could charge a token amount for rent & bills which would teach them the importance of budgeting, prioritising & adulting.

cyvguhb · 22/07/2025 21:26

I haven't been in a similar situation but why would you not use the savings? What would be the alternative, to go into debt while having money in a savings account? That wouldn't make any sense

AvidJadeShaker · 22/07/2025 21:27

How about asking for 10% of take home pay for housekeeping?

Original poster
Welshmum2010 · 22/07/2025 21:27

BeMellowAquaSquid · 22/07/2025 21:25

Sorry if I’ve misread this are they or are they not starting an apprenticeship at 16?

They are starting this sept

OP posts:
BeMellowAquaSquid · 22/07/2025 21:29

I’m sure child maintnenace has to continue until they are 18 if it’s an approved apprenticeship? Anything can happen in two years I’d wait and reassess it then, your ex will have to pay regardless.

cornflourblue · 22/07/2025 21:30

Ask for a small contribution from their income - this will help with their own money management.

And dip into the savings that you specifically put aside for the next stage of your child's education, which is what this is - just reframed.

But absolutely don't get into debt when you have money in the bank, that would be madness.

Fearfulsaints · 22/07/2025 21:30

I think i woukd use the savings they dont know about. Its still supporting their education/training as it would likely have gone on accommodation or food if uni was in the mix. Its still going on accommodation and food.

Especially if the get £1k and a small lump sum.

I am saying that assuming it's a low apprentiship wage so its better they keep it all.

Michele09 · 22/07/2025 21:31

If you dont want to take part of the wages I would use it to fund their rent/bills/food. This would be the same as it would have been used at uni except you are the landlord instead of the hall of residence/rented house.

Iloveacurry · 22/07/2025 21:32

How much will they be earning? They should pay small percentage to housekeeping. You also should use the savings which they won’t be using for university.

Original poster
Welshmum2010 · 22/07/2025 21:33

Dearover · 22/07/2025 21:26

How short will you be each month? You could charge a token amount for rent & bills which would teach them the importance of budgeting, prioritising & adulting.

I’ll be getting 500 a month less but there won’t be costs associated with school. I could ask them to pay £25 a week to help and do some budgeting

OP posts:
Almostwelsh · 22/07/2025 21:33

It's your money. Use it. Better going to your household than into the pockets of a student landlord, which what was originally going to happen. Your teen wasn't going to directly benefit - the landlord was.

Original poster
Welshmum2010 · 22/07/2025 21:35

Iloveacurry · 22/07/2025 21:32

How much will they be earning? They should pay small percentage to housekeeping. You also should use the savings which they won’t be using for university.

About £1000 a month, I feel bad about it for some reason but I could ask them to pay a little each month and take a little from the savings

OP posts:
Gcsunnyside23 · 22/07/2025 21:36

Welshmum2010 · 22/07/2025 21:33

I’ll be getting 500 a month less but there won’t be costs associated with school. I could ask them to pay £25 a week to help and do some budgeting

Show quote history

I would do this, it's good for them to contribute when they start earning. I don't think you're wrong using the savings either as you'll be down alot

Original poster
Welshmum2010 · 22/07/2025 21:36

cornflourblue · 22/07/2025 21:30

Ask for a small contribution from their income - this will help with their own money management.

And dip into the savings that you specifically put aside for the next stage of your child's education, which is what this is - just reframed.

But absolutely don't get into debt when you have money in the bank, that would be madness.

I wouldn’t go into debt it would just mean extra money for things like holidays but I’ve also realised the saving will stop

OP posts:
TeenLifeMum · 22/07/2025 21:36

My mum always took 10% of my salary, which felt fair to me.

Poobs2022 · 22/07/2025 21:41

I used to pay my dad £40pw 20 years ago and I was also paying for my uni house rent as I'd dropped out but still went back at the weekends to party.

Original poster
Welshmum2010 · 22/07/2025 21:44

BeMellowAquaSquid · 22/07/2025 21:29

I’m sure child maintnenace has to continue until they are 18 if it’s an approved apprenticeship? Anything can happen in two years I’d wait and reassess it then, your ex will have to pay regardless.

I will check again but the cm site says it’s stops unless it’s a foundation apprentiship or traineeship which this one isn’t as it’s fully paid

OP posts:
AllHoityToity · 22/07/2025 21:57

His much is the apprenticeship paying?

I think you are giving a false picture of reality to your child by saying that they should keep all of their wages.

Zanoni · 22/07/2025 21:58

Use your savings, you can’t afford not to really.
My son did an apprenticeship that lasted for 4 years and we did…
First two years on a very small wage, he had to pay for his own phone bill.
Year 3 was the phone bill and a contribution towards the food shop. (He’d half fill the freezer and probably spent around £60)
Year 4 was the same but he was living a lot more independently by then (now 20 years old)
Often staying at girlfriend’s and sorting 99% of his own meals.
As part of his apprenticeship he had to learn to drive (electrician)
He payed for his own lessons but I did manage to buy him a cheap second hand car, he had to pay for to run it though.
He is qualified now so gets a company van and fuel card.
He is still living at home and is saving towards a deposit (so he says a lot of his money goes on travelling) fine by me, your only young and free once.
He earns around £4000 per month now and he pays for his phone bill, the council tax bill and his own food shop.
Of course there are people out there who can offer there children lots more uni fees/house deposits/massive trust funds. But not all of us can and it doesn’t make you less of a parent.

BeMellowAquaSquid · 22/07/2025 22:09

Are you still paying into the savings that you have so far accrued? If so definitely stop. If you’re feeling guilty about using it then maybe have a conversation with them and let them know your intentions and that you’re doing it in lieu of them paying you anything.

my dd starts an apprenticeship on 19 August and I’m not going to personally charge her house keeping mainly as we have an agreement that she must prove to me that she is saving money herself. She’s been really good so far. From her Saturday job she’s saved enough to pay last years car insurance and this coming year. We are London based so am assuming the wage may be slightly higher than Wales but she still has a sizeable travel bill in and out of London. I think after she’s saved she will be left with around £800 a month. She’s paid for all her own clothes, toiletries etc (unless she wants to use my radox and economy stuff!) so the way I see it yes I won’t receive child maintnenace for her anymore but she’s standing on her own two feet. I think personally all parents (myself included) need to accept that child maintenance does eventually stop.

Original poster
Welshmum2010 · 22/07/2025 22:14

Thank you for the last 2 posts that’s really reassuring, I pay for her phone and gym so it would be a good start she pays for those herself

OP posts:
DorothyStorm · 22/07/2025 22:26

I dont understand how using the savings will help. That money isnt coming back. This isnt short term. What happens when the savings run out? Surely the answer is look at increasing your incomings as well as decreasing your outgoings.

Original poster
Welshmum2010 · 22/07/2025 22:29

DorothyStorm · 22/07/2025 22:26

I dont understand how using the savings will help. That money isnt coming back. This isnt short term. What happens when the savings run out? Surely the answer is look at increasing your incomings as well as decreasing your outgoings.

Because it is short term until they move out or earn a full wage when they can contribute. I don’t think your statement is very helpful or kind. I’ve received child maintance due to raising a child alone. I cannot earn more than a full time wage

OP posts: